Ex MIL keeps asking me for money

What? Are you projecting? Or OP’s MIL?

OP’s ex-MIL is a cheeky chancer. And? Should that prevent OP from ever getting married? And there’s been no indication of OP’s life being a shit show or her not prioritising her son.

Can we please stop blaming mothers for other people’s actions??

Don’t pay her anything! Even if she claims she will take your DS to a paying activity or feed him etc. Just say no!

I’d say he can’t go then, as that’s 1/3 of your pathetic £30 maintenance on one day. If she wants money, her son can provide it. I’d never ask for money to care for my own grandchild.

Deleted as posted in wrong thread

Your DS is seeing Ex mil in his time. This means he is fully responsible for his allocated time as to what expenditure there is as it's nothing to do with you. It's lovely that he is spending time with extended family but be clear that the times are split between two parents only.

I used to pay my mum when I asked her to have my kids that didn't make her a grasping gran. OP isn't asking this woman to have DS she is asking and wanting the money. If she needs the money to cover extra costs to have him she should ask her son. The father.
What OP spends her money on is not relevant.

Does your son want to go? If not then I’d just not let him go. If he does then could you ask ex H if he could take him to visit in his own time?

Just tell her if she cannot afford to have him you’ll collect him as the measley £30 a week doesn’t even pay to feed him for the week. What a miserable woman. To be honest it should be no contact between you, she should be contacting your ex.
i hope you’re new mil is better op.

How old is your son?
Does the ex use her for childcare?

I

The poor child. They understand. Tussles over 10 quid, grasping gran, mother paying for some wedding when she has no money - the poor child. OK, you don't pay her, he finds out that gran was only interested in that money, not him, or you pay and tell him you pay gran, what is it doing to his sense of worth to his family? Why are you concerned only about who pays whom and not what impact it will have on him? Anyway, what paying for the wedding can there be if £10 is such an issue?

I immediately wondered if your ex has told his mum that he’s paying you loads of maintenance. Because that’s what my ex did lol. His brother was taking our dd away for the weekend with his own dd and he asked for money for her “seeing as your the one getting maintenance “. When I asked him how much of the ten pounds a week I got from ex would he like he was gobsmacked.

Absolutely not - you don't need to justify it at all with how much you get from her son
Simply tell her if she can't afford to have him overnight she has 2 choices - she doesn't have him or she asks the custodial parent - her son - for the money as he is the one that is responsible for his welfare at that time.
You then block her

She is batshit. Tell her if she wants to see your son fair enough but you are not paying her to do so. I would also make sure she knows just how little her son pays, he may well have told her he pays more.

I wouldn’t pay her anything. I’d do what pp says and reply, “I get £30 a week for ds and I have to buy pay for all his clothes and shoes and the little extras like taking a gift to his friend’s birthday. I don’t spend £10 on an evening meal and breakfast - he’s be happy with vegetable pasta for dinner and some cereal and a cup of milk for breakfast. If you can’t afford to feed ds, then I’m happy for you to bring him back to me next time before dinner, although that would be a shame for him as I know he enjoys his visits to see you.”

That's ridiculous she's asking for money. Say no.
She should be embarrassed that her son only pays £30 a week for his own child - but no, she wants some of it.

Hi MIL appreciate you looking after DS however I just can’t afford to give you money when he is with you. As you may be aware your son gives me £30pw child maintenance which does not cover much so me giving you £10 pw is taking that away from family funds. Going forward if you need money when you are with DS please ask your son. DO NOT GIVE THIS WOMAN ANY MORE!! Cheeky bint

I wouldn’t even do this. The time he spends with his dad is already deducted from what you get in csm. His dad is supposed to provide for him entirely on his time. The cms is for the time he’s with you.

I’d tell her to get fucked. She sounds vile.
If you don’t want to say that then ignore all her messages.

Tell her now before she asks again. Tell her you get £30 a week from his father which is nowhere near half the cost of raising a child.

Just say no. Stupid woman.

ETA- MIL is stupid, not you.

Paying for your wedding or anything else in your life is nothing to do with this absolute cheeky fuckery.
I could understand if you asked her to have DS paying her something but you aren't she is asking to see him and if she wants money for that it's her own DS she should ask not you. £30pw is barely covering very much for your DS so why she thinks she will have a tenner of that I don't know. Bloody CF's never fail to astound me.

Give her £4.28 that’s 1 days worth of the £30 a week her son gives you for him.

Immediately stop giving her any money, and tell her you won't be giving her anymore and that includes activities. If that means she stops seeing your son then so be it. Also stop asking her for favours - this behaviour shows your ex MIL really dislikes you.

It's in your ex's time, so it's nothing to do with you. I wouldn't give her money at all. Don't muddy the waters by giving money for an activity: if your ex wants your DS to do an activity in his time then he should be paying for it.

Her son has probably told her that he has no money because he has to give you loads of money a week, he probably hasn’t told her the amount!