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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

For asking my partner not to sleep naked

479 replies

Em111110 · 04/05/2026 23:21

For some reason, my partner of 13 years has recently started sleeping naked. By recent, I mean the last few weeks. He says it is freeing and he sleeps better naked. There are occasions where we have fallen asleep naked in the past but we mostly wear pjs or at least underwear. The main reason is we have an 11 year old daughter, but I am also a bit of a clean freak and he is a typical sweaty farty man and it it gives me the ick sleeping naked in our sheets. My partner also doesn’t sleep well and gets up numerous times through the night, leaving the room to go for a drink, bathroom etc naked or kicks the sheets off so everything is on show. He says I am controlling for asking him to wear at least underwear to bed but I don’t think it’s appropriate for him to be naked when we have a nearly teenage daughter. AIBU?

OP posts:
Allisnotlost1 · 05/05/2026 08:26

gamerchick · 05/05/2026 08:21

Well actually, when we fart we do expell fecal matter. All of us.

Farting isn't something you can control.

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A common myth. Farts aren’t strong enough to do that:

https://medium.com/a-microbiome-scientist-at-large/do-doctors-farts-contaminate-operating-rooms-66806ebd22d3

Imlyingandthatsthetruth · 05/05/2026 08:26

gamerchick · 05/05/2026 08:21

Well actually, when we fart we do expell fecal matter. All of us.

Farting isn't something you can control.

Show quote history

There are four states of matter ma'am, solid, liquid, gas and plasma. A fart is most definitely in the gas category. If you are expelling solids or liquids when you fart, please see your medical practitioner. And get the crowd to stand back if plasma is involved.

MN. Where crap is spoken daily.

socks1107 · 05/05/2026 08:24

It’s absolutely fine. I haven’t worn clothes in bed for 20 years. It is being controlling to dictate what he does and doesn’t wear to bed

CloudyBayPlease · 05/05/2026 08:24

We both always sleep naked and have managed to raise 2 children to untraumatised adulthood despite this.

You should try it OP (and stop being controlling).

gamerchick · 05/05/2026 08:21

Allisnotlost1 · 05/05/2026 08:10

Unless he has a medical issue, or is a corpse, his body is not leaking ‘faecal residue’ onto the sheets at any time.

If you genuinely believe we leak like that, presumably you wear some kind of incontinence pants at all times, so once it would also leak into regular clothing and subsequently leave traces on the furniture?

Show quote history

Well actually, when we fart we do expell fecal matter. All of us.

Farting isn't something you can control.

EvelynHugo12 · 05/05/2026 08:21

Wouldn’t care about the sleeping naked but I do find it weird that he’s not horrified by the idea of his 11 year old seeing him naked in the middle of the night.

I have an 11 year old. My husband would simply never deliberately put her in a position where she had to see him naked. It’s not appropriate.

GripGetter · 05/05/2026 08:16

ainsleysanob · 05/05/2026 07:22

If you’re rubbing your arse hole and flaps on your bed sheets during the night, then you must sleep in a way no other human ever has.

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This is GOLD!

Allisnotlost1 · 05/05/2026 08:10

Feis123 · 05/05/2026 07:33

Unhygienic. At times he would be literally wiping his faecal residue on the sheets when tossing and turning.

Unless he has a medical issue, or is a corpse, his body is not leaking ‘faecal residue’ onto the sheets at any time.

If you genuinely believe we leak like that, presumably you wear some kind of incontinence pants at all times, so once it would also leak into regular clothing and subsequently leave traces on the furniture?

Lurker85 · 05/05/2026 08:05

Poor bloke

SliceofTosst · 05/05/2026 08:00

Feis123 · 05/05/2026 07:57

Educate yourself! Even the most basic googling will get you to a relevant article on average faecal content of adult underwear for healthy, faecal continent non-geriatric adults.

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Sheets are not worn like underwear.

Weeellokthen · 05/05/2026 07:59

Applewisp · 05/05/2026 05:20

Unfortunately you can’t tell him what to do? Yes you can. And you can report his naked ass to social services before he traumatizes his own daughter.

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Behave yersel woman 😂

Feis123 · 05/05/2026 07:58

ThisOneLife · 05/05/2026 07:45

Most people clean themselves after defecating and most peoples’ anus is protected by their buttocks.

Show quote history

Educate yourself! Even the most basic googling will get you to a relevant article on average faecal content of adult underwear for healthy, faecal continent non-geriatric adults.

SixLeggedSugarBug · 05/05/2026 07:57

I agree with almost everyone else. Sleeping naked in his own bed, fine and of the thought of your husbands naked body offends you so much you might want to think a little more about that.

Shorts or a dressing gown for walking around.

Feis123 · 05/05/2026 07:57

SliceofTosst · 05/05/2026 07:44

Where is his arsehole? On his back?

Laying on your side or back doesn't leave 'faceal residue' anywhere unless you've smeared it all over yourself first.

Show quote history

Educate yourself! Even the most basic googling will get you to a relevant article on average faecal content of adult underwear for healthy, faecal continent non-geriatric adults.

Tink3rbell30 · 05/05/2026 07:56

DugnuttEyeBoogies · 05/05/2026 07:22

It’s not gross it’s perfectly normal.

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I think it is and you'd have to constantly change the sheets.

Tink3rbell30 · 05/05/2026 07:55

ainsleysanob · 05/05/2026 07:22

If you’re rubbing your arse hole and flaps on your bed sheets during the night, then you must sleep in a way no other human ever has.

Show quote history

You know what I mean.

Weeellokthen · 05/05/2026 07:55

I cannot imagine sleeping in anything so uncomfortable. Both me and dp sleep naked.

Sunshineandgrapefruit · 05/05/2026 07:53

YABU. Teach your daughter to knock. She shouldn't be in your room anyway. If you're worried about hygiene just ask him to have a shower before bed. Sheets should be changed weekly anyway.

hereforthelolz · 05/05/2026 07:52

I’ve started sleeping naked too, sleep so much better.

ThisOneLife · 05/05/2026 07:51

DugnuttEyeBoogies · 05/05/2026 07:35

It’s utter batshittery like this nonsense that keeps me coming back to MN. Hilarious.

Theres a massive epidemic of violence against women and girls. Rapes happen by the minute and the police, courts and system do absolutely nothing.

Do you really truly think SS would do anything about something that hasn’t happened other than roll their eyes as they put the phone down and mark the call as a waste of time.

Oh a man is sleeping in his own bed naked? We will send the Swat team round right away ma’am!!

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Exactly!

arethereanyleftatall · 05/05/2026 07:49

The tone of your post suggests that he repulses you, so I imagine you have far bigger problems than this.

ainsleysanob · 05/05/2026 07:49

DugnuttEyeBoogies · 05/05/2026 07:35

It’s utter batshittery like this nonsense that keeps me coming back to MN. Hilarious.

Theres a massive epidemic of violence against women and girls. Rapes happen by the minute and the police, courts and system do absolutely nothing.

Do you really truly think SS would do anything about something that hasn’t happened other than roll their eyes as they put the phone down and mark the call as a waste of time.

Oh a man is sleeping in his own bed naked? We will send the Swat team round right away ma’am!!

Show quote history

It is truly hilarious! It’s almost as if the daughter will die on the spot if she comes across the naked form of her father in the night. Jesus, no one wore anything to bed when I grew up and my dads naked body was just that, my dads naked body. It’s the same in my house now, if my 14 year old son is supposed to be alarmed by his dad and I’s naked bodies then you better tell him that, because he’s currently stood entirely naked himself on the landing without a care in the world.

I’m sure if your daughter doesn’t like it she’ll say something and unless your husband regularly shits himself or forgets to clean his arse and nob end then your bedding will be fine.

FiveShelties · 05/05/2026 07:47

Interesting the OP has not returned........................

ThisOneLife · 05/05/2026 07:45

Feis123 · 05/05/2026 07:33

Unhygienic. At times he would be literally wiping his faecal residue on the sheets when tossing and turning.

Most people clean themselves after defecating and most peoples’ anus is protected by their buttocks.

SliceofTosst · 05/05/2026 07:44

Feis123 · 05/05/2026 07:33

Unhygienic. At times he would be literally wiping his faecal residue on the sheets when tossing and turning.

Where is his arsehole? On his back?

Laying on your side or back doesn't leave 'faceal residue' anywhere unless you've smeared it all over yourself first.