I’m not happy in life

Quite seriously, you need to put yourself on a news diet or your mental health is going to go down the drain. Change what you can change - write to your MP, go on marches, volunteer, make a difference however small.

It's called vicarious trauma.

I get what the OP is saying - but for their mental health, they may as well cease and desist if they feel they can't alter it. Otherwise it's one more sin - being unhappy when you have the choice not to be.

I mean, let's put it another way - how about I inform you about another load of terrible things going on in the world right now, which you don't know about? Then you have even more reason to be unhappy. So do you want to hear about them? Yes or no? Working back from that, maybe ration the amount of news you imbibe each day or weak, or maybe read a catch-up newspaper at the end of the week so it doesn't have the same effect as daily stuff.

Well you can of course choose to be unhappy because other people are suffering.

I would ask though: what purpose do you think that serves? Do you think walking around feeling completely miserable helps any of those people?

It’s ok to “not understand” when others experience life differently to how you do.

You don’t need to understand that difference.

You can only live within your own feelings and experiences and manage your life accordingly.

You aren’t able to stop children being bombed anyway, unless you’re brokering peace in the ME. There is suffering you can help alleviate. Focus on that.

She’s on the internet telling us that she can’t go out with her friends without thinking she has no right to be happy when there’s suffering in the world.

I’d say that was the definition of performative suffering.

What is performative about it?

Well, one factor you have to take in is that the 'News' is served up in a particular way. Firstly, there's overkill on it. Like the internet, it's swings and roundabouts. One the one hand, you may not be shocked at stuff that might go on in your personal experience - due to knowledge of events on the news. But the sheer scale of the amount of news is beyond anything the normal human brain can assimilate, so you are simply not being fair on yourself by exposing yourself to all this, it isn't normal.

I mean, in the 15th century, what 'news' would you get? You'd be stuck in a village all your life and never go further afield. Okay, so you would die in your 40s if you even got that far, and of Black Death but... Ditto for many actually even 100 years ago, not that much news, and without TV it would be on the basis of making the effort to read a paper.

The other thing is, the 24 rolling news cycle tries to make it like the hit parade of decades ago, with a big kerfuffle and 'straight in at no 8 this week' or 'now for some breaking news' - it aims to raise your dopamine levels and stress levels too.

Finally one common denominator of all this news is that mostly you and I can do very little about any of it, we have no sense of agency - so of course the overall feeling is that of despair and being out of control, hardly a nice way to think. It breeds anxiety, almost like those Times supplements that bang on each and very week about health tips and stuff, it's too much, also book reviews where you feel you ought to read the suggestions but never get to it.

I know if I didn't watch the News it wouldn't make any difference to the outcome of events, but I don't feel that, it's like the fan watching a football match, he kids himself his tension affects the result. It also really is a form of entertainment but not a healthy one.

For some reason I can't get on X/Twitter on my computer of late and feel happier for it - but does that mean I am being selfish and blind for not keeping in with it?

Ooof yeah I could've written this! I think having OCD doesn't help. But yeah I stand by it, how can anyone be fine with the way the world is...and it's not something you can turn on and off if you're affected more than others either. You just have to avoid basically all news.

It won't help anyone if you're miserable. You have agency in your life. Make a positive change somewhere AND learn to enjoy yourself. Otherwise life is pointless.

But your performative pain is of no use to anyone at risk, in danger, poor, distressed, in war etc. Do something about it. Volunteer at a soup kitchen, fundraise for MSF, train as a Samaritan, lobby politicians for change — otherwise you might just as well be bopping about mindlessly.