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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think there will be many more disabled adults in 20 years?

655 replies

Walkyrie · 03/05/2026 22:04

I’m disabled myself, just to put that out there.

It just seems like the number of people with a disability, usually a psychiatric one, is going through the roof.

40% of disability benefit claimants are claiming for mental health related reasons. The number of anxious children and teens on here, and that I know in my own life and family, is really really high. So many schools refusers and kids in need of extra support, special school placements and so on. It seems there are a lot of unemployed young adults living at home who simply don’t have the mental acuity to get a job, live independently, have a life of their own.

3 children in my family are currently school refusing, one we only found out about today but it was not a surprise as she’s always been very anxious and has selective mutism.

My AIBU is, should we be doing something to prepare for what may be a very high number of adults not working in years to come? How will we sustain them all?

OP posts:
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9
ruethewhirl · 05/05/2026 18:29

LoyalMember · 05/05/2026 18:22

A little bit of it is, though, if we're being perfectly honest. Out of the millions of genuine claimants, there's obviously a percentage that are at it for all they can get out of it. We all know them. Every family, street, village, town, and city has them. If you don’t think that then you're just being naive.

Human nature being what it is, there will always be grifters. Of course I don't think there aren't. 🙄 But it's a problem when people start to tar those of us with genuine disabilities with the same brush, don't you think?

NorthXNorthWest · 05/05/2026 18:24

29000seconds · 05/05/2026 18:17

Yes. Effectively saying “push through it” dismisses it as being “feeling a bit sad” or “getting a bit anxious in new situations” or whatever i.e. NOT being a medical condition, as these are things EVERYONE experiences. This is completely different to someone with a clinical condition that meets that level of diagnostic threshold which is debilitating to the extent that it meets the medical criteria to constitute a disability. The same applies to autism, autistic burnout, etc. And there is no more chance of “pushing through” that than there is of just ignoring cancer or any other severe physical health condition and that making it go away/ not affect you so severely that you can’t perform normal daily activities.

So much of this thread exhibits economic, scientific, and medical ignorance to quite a shocking degree.

It matches the intellectual snobbery of those offering to build houses on sand and wondering why nobody in their right mind is buying.

29000seconds · 05/05/2026 18:23

NorthXNorthWest · 05/05/2026 08:19

You have oversimplified things. Several different issues,with different drivers and trade offs. These don't just neatly tie up.

It matters, but not in the way you’re saying. The bigger problem isn’t pensions, it’s fewer people working. That means less tax and weaker growth. Fix health and help people stay in or return to work — that’s what will do most to improve the economy.

France is not perfect and will end up where we are even, with its current syatem,unless there are changes. They just have a buffer because they have managed healthcare a bit better than us - dont forget they also have a system where children may have to contribute if their parents can't afford care cost.

Same for Australia, they are fortunate to have valuable natural resources which contributes towards a buffer. They will still face the sane issues with an aging population. Again just delayed unless nothing else changes.

,

“The problem isn’t pensions, it’s fewer people working”

That is incorrect, as I’ve pointed out with facts and data in multiple posts on this thread. I even provided a chart showing that employment rates for those aged 16- retirement this decade are higher than they have ever been since the 1970s. It is a myth that fewer working-aged adults are working now than previously. If you did want to analyse the more detailed data you’d also find that they are working more hours on average. And getting paid less in real-terms, despite working harder and more of them working than ever before.

All of the economic data is published and publicly available, should you wish to inform yourself rather than parroting nonsense you heard on G-Beebies.

Yes, my comments on the thread are “simplified” because it’s apparent that many people posting don’t even have a GCSE-level basic understanding of economics so I’ve of course had to try to keep it fairly simple. And of course, per my earlier comments, the systems in no country are perfect. What is undeniable, however, is that the UK’s specific economic woes are far worse than they needed to be and not caused entirely by recent geopolitical issues given that our GDP per capita and living standards are continually falling proportionately to what used to be our comparator countries.

As economists we spend a lot of time looking at the international comparison data, the systems in different countries and their real-world effects, and it is very clear which problems are causing these UK-specific issues (that are within the power of our Government to address) and what the solutions are, some of which I’ve outlined here for anybody who actually wanted to engage with the thread topic in a genuine, rational and factual manner rather than utilise the thread to spout off about their personal prejudices and highlight to everyone reading their lack of economic understanding or grasp of basic maths.

As usual, statement of facts and numbers has been ignored by the majority of posters, engaged with by a very small proportion, and caused outrage amongst those who appear to live in an alternative reality of their own creation where facts and data don’t exist and are therefore furious whenever anybody dares to mention them.

It is sad because there are solutions to these issues. No system is perfect as I said yesterday but there are systems which have been proven to work far more effectively than ours providing better social and financial outcomes, value for money, etc that we can emulate if we wish and would be equally functional in the UK as in the similar countries that have created/ adopted them already. If the UK takes the appropriate actions to reform healthcare, education, pensions, infrastructure, international trade and its tax system then living standards will start to rise again. If it doesn’t then they won’t. If the electorate is so idiotic that it continually allows its politicians to implement policies that accelerate the decline then obviously that is what will continue to happen. And if it votes in Reform then this will happen on fast forward.

LoyalMember · 05/05/2026 18:22

ruethewhirl · 05/05/2026 18:10

Well said. Plus a lot of employers are probably of the same ilk as a lot of MNers and think of disability as attention-seeking, being a snowflake, needing to get a grip, and various other delightful assumptions.

A little bit of it is, though, if we're being perfectly honest. Out of the millions of genuine claimants, there's obviously a percentage that are at it for all they can get out of it. We all know them. Every family, street, village, town, and city has them. If you don’t think that then you're just being naive.

29000seconds · 05/05/2026 18:17

XenoBitch · 05/05/2026 18:09

Also, hating a job, and pushing through MH illness symptoms, are different.

Yes. Effectively saying “push through it” dismisses it as being “feeling a bit sad” or “getting a bit anxious in new situations” or whatever i.e. NOT being a medical condition, as these are things EVERYONE experiences. This is completely different to someone with a clinical condition that meets that level of diagnostic threshold which is debilitating to the extent that it meets the medical criteria to constitute a disability. The same applies to autism, autistic burnout, etc. And there is no more chance of “pushing through” that than there is of just ignoring cancer or any other severe physical health condition and that making it go away/ not affect you so severely that you can’t perform normal daily activities.

So much of this thread exhibits economic, scientific, and medical ignorance to quite a shocking degree.

ruethewhirl · 05/05/2026 18:10

XenoBitch · 05/05/2026 17:15

Haha, no, a lot of employers are not prepared to make adjustments at all.
And a disabled person can not switch off their disability to suddenly be able to do their job.

Well said. Plus a lot of employers are probably of the same ilk as a lot of MNers and think of disability as attention-seeking, being a snowflake, needing to get a grip, and various other delightful assumptions.

XenoBitch · 05/05/2026 18:09

29000seconds · 05/05/2026 18:08

People do. Until they just can’t carry on anymore.

Also, hating a job, and pushing through MH illness symptoms, are different.

29000seconds · 05/05/2026 18:08

LoyalMember · 05/05/2026 13:11

A lot of people have no choice but to go to jobs they hate because it's not about them any more. People need wages to keep a roof over their head, pay bills, and clothe and feed themselves and their children. I know it sounds harsh to say 'tough titty', but there's often no choice to be made, and you have to just endure it for the sake of your commitments and dependents.

People do. Until they just can’t carry on anymore.

29000seconds · 05/05/2026 17:58

likelysuspect · 05/05/2026 08:13

Yes I do. There is nothing incorrect in what I said.

You said:

“ND is not hereditary, the current working theory is that its genetic.”

The definition of “hereditary”:

Hereditary is an adjective describing characteristics or diseases passed to a child from parents before birth, or titles/property legally passed to a child upon a parent's death. It also describes someone holding such a inherited title (e.g., a "hereditary peer").
Key Definitions from Oxford:
(Of a characteristic/disease): Genetically passed from parent to offspring (e.g., "a hereditary disease/condition," "hair loss is often hereditary").
(Of a title/monarchy): Legally given to someone's child upon the parent's death (e.g., "a hereditary title/monarchy").
(Of a person): Holding a rank or title that was inherited (e.g., "hereditary peers/rulers").

The Oxford English Dictionary (OED) indicates the term has developed usages across genetics, medicine, law, and politics since Middle English.
Common Examples & Context:
Medical: Hereditary predisposition, hereditary illness.
Legal/Political: Hereditary title, hereditary peerage, hereditary monarch.

Origin:
Derived from Latin hereditarius, meaning "belonging to an heir".

If you understand what “hereditary” means and what “genetic” means then why did you say “ND is not hereditary, the current working theory is that it is genetic”?

Genetic conditions are, by definition, hereditary, obviously (well, it’s obvious to anybody who knows what “hereditary” means).

And neither, incidentally, is it a “working theory”. It is well-evidenced with numerous causal genes having been identified to date in copious scientific research on the subject.

29000seconds · 05/05/2026 17:44

Todayismyfavouriteday · 05/05/2026 05:56

No, I won't. I said 'some people', and I added 'I'm sorry for those who are genuinely disabled.' I used modality, which means I restricted my comments to those who are not disabled, but misdiagnose themselves as such to avoid taking responsibility for their lives. Perhaps the person who deleted it did not notice that I avoided absolute statements. Hedging language (modality) means I was addressing a specific group, not everyone. I feel for anyone who has a disability, and sincerely hope they will get the help and support they deserve.

I’m afraid the offensive and discriminatory comments are unacceptable and shameful regardless of whether you tried to “hedge” them to get them past the mods. Thankfully, the moderators saw through your attempts to disguise what you were doing and deleted what you wrote anyway.

The fact you haven’t reflected on it and refuse to apologise speaks volumes.

JollyDenimSeal · 05/05/2026 17:15

OonaStubbs · 05/05/2026 17:13

Employers are prepared to make adjustments for disabled employees but at the end of the day, they need to be prepared to do the job they are paid to do.

Some won't

XenoBitch · 05/05/2026 17:15

OonaStubbs · 05/05/2026 17:13

Employers are prepared to make adjustments for disabled employees but at the end of the day, they need to be prepared to do the job they are paid to do.

Haha, no, a lot of employers are not prepared to make adjustments at all.
And a disabled person can not switch off their disability to suddenly be able to do their job.

TigerRag · 05/05/2026 17:14

OonaStubbs · 05/05/2026 17:13

Employers are prepared to make adjustments for disabled employees but at the end of the day, they need to be prepared to do the job they are paid to do.

And many of the adjustments some of us need aren't reasonable

OonaStubbs · 05/05/2026 17:13

Employers are prepared to make adjustments for disabled employees but at the end of the day, they need to be prepared to do the job they are paid to do.

XenoBitch · 05/05/2026 17:03

youalright · 05/05/2026 17:01

Its so funny to me people on this thread say mentally ill people need to get off benefits and work and on another thread going right now a manager is moaning about their mentally ill employee and people are agreeing. People can't have it both ways. People want smi people working just not in their workplace 🙈

Yep, it makes no sense to me at all. A lot of double standards on here.

youalright · 05/05/2026 17:01

Its so funny to me people on this thread say mentally ill people need to get off benefits and work and on another thread going right now a manager is moaning about their mentally ill employee and people are agreeing. People can't have it both ways. People want smi people working just not in their workplace 🙈

XenoBitch · 05/05/2026 16:08

JollyDenimSeal · 05/05/2026 13:27

No one should go to work to have their health broken when they are already suffering from post natal depression as happened to my friend. I also was bullied in several jobs - which affected my health very badly - to the point that I went self employed.

But according to some people on this thread work will cure my mental health issues. You didn't actually see the point I was trying to make? For some people work actually makes their mental health worse and your response is "tough titty".

It is like telling someone with a hairline fracture that they will be fine to run a marathon.

If you don't make time for your wellness, you will have to make time for your illness.

JollyDenimSeal · 05/05/2026 13:35

XenoBitch · 05/05/2026 13:13

I absolutely agree.
People spout off about work being the solution to MH issues, when for some people it was work that made them very ill to begin with. Also, not having the demand of work and all that comes with it is what keeps some people stable and out of hospital.
It was my GP and also the OH department for my workplace that said I should drop to part time, but my manager said no. Full time or nothing. So I plodded on until I became even more unwell.
You can also have purpose and routine without being in paid work, but it seems anyone off work with MH issues is assumed to betaking the piss and sitting in a dark room playing on games consoles.

And that's if they really have mental health issues in the first place because apparently anxiety is the new bad back and people only have MH issues in the first place so they can claim benefits

Owninterpreter · 05/05/2026 13:28

LoyalMember · 05/05/2026 13:11

A lot of people have no choice but to go to jobs they hate because it's not about them any more. People need wages to keep a roof over their head, pay bills, and clothe and feed themselves and their children. I know it sounds harsh to say 'tough titty', but there's often no choice to be made, and you have to just endure it for the sake of your commitments and dependents.

A lot of people also have no choice but to leave thier jobs when they have poor mental health as thier employer doesnt want them as they arent doing a great job if their mental health is significantly poor enough.

They cant make good decisions, deal with people well, they might behave erratically or even make repeated self harm on site, some snap and are agressive (more men)

Some good employers will support with sick leave and even pay for therapies but many others will go to capability procedures or less ethical pushing out.

JollyDenimSeal · 05/05/2026 13:27

LoyalMember · 05/05/2026 13:11

A lot of people have no choice but to go to jobs they hate because it's not about them any more. People need wages to keep a roof over their head, pay bills, and clothe and feed themselves and their children. I know it sounds harsh to say 'tough titty', but there's often no choice to be made, and you have to just endure it for the sake of your commitments and dependents.

No one should go to work to have their health broken when they are already suffering from post natal depression as happened to my friend. I also was bullied in several jobs - which affected my health very badly - to the point that I went self employed.

But according to some people on this thread work will cure my mental health issues. You didn't actually see the point I was trying to make? For some people work actually makes their mental health worse and your response is "tough titty".

XenoBitch · 05/05/2026 13:13

JollyDenimSeal · 05/05/2026 13:03

Some of the posts on here are absolutely staggering. It is sometimes hard enough to get support from a GP when you actually do suffer from depression. I had a friend who who was working in adult care and hated her job. She was also suffering from really bad post natal depression and asked that some adjustments be made to her working hours. She asked for flexible working hours. That request was supported by her GP who said she was suffering from reactive depression. That request was denied.

Her ex husbands employer was the one who gave him flexible working hours so the kids could be dropped off at nursery and picked up. Her employer put someone on a written warning because they took time off after they had a miscarriage IN work.

There are people working in miserable jobs that makes their mental health worse. I have worked in several horrible jobs that led to me having to be signed off work because of bullying and put on anti depressants.

Do people not understand when they are posting just go to work and that will help your mental health that some peoples jobs actually cause mental health issues in the first place?

Edited

I absolutely agree.
People spout off about work being the solution to MH issues, when for some people it was work that made them very ill to begin with. Also, not having the demand of work and all that comes with it is what keeps some people stable and out of hospital.
It was my GP and also the OH department for my workplace that said I should drop to part time, but my manager said no. Full time or nothing. So I plodded on until I became even more unwell.
You can also have purpose and routine without being in paid work, but it seems anyone off work with MH issues is assumed to betaking the piss and sitting in a dark room playing on games consoles.

LoyalMember · 05/05/2026 13:11

JollyDenimSeal · 05/05/2026 13:03

Some of the posts on here are absolutely staggering. It is sometimes hard enough to get support from a GP when you actually do suffer from depression. I had a friend who who was working in adult care and hated her job. She was also suffering from really bad post natal depression and asked that some adjustments be made to her working hours. She asked for flexible working hours. That request was supported by her GP who said she was suffering from reactive depression. That request was denied.

Her ex husbands employer was the one who gave him flexible working hours so the kids could be dropped off at nursery and picked up. Her employer put someone on a written warning because they took time off after they had a miscarriage IN work.

There are people working in miserable jobs that makes their mental health worse. I have worked in several horrible jobs that led to me having to be signed off work because of bullying and put on anti depressants.

Do people not understand when they are posting just go to work and that will help your mental health that some peoples jobs actually cause mental health issues in the first place?

Edited

A lot of people have no choice but to go to jobs they hate because it's not about them any more. People need wages to keep a roof over their head, pay bills, and clothe and feed themselves and their children. I know it sounds harsh to say 'tough titty', but there's often no choice to be made, and you have to just endure it for the sake of your commitments and dependents.

JollyDenimSeal · 05/05/2026 13:03

Some of the posts on here are absolutely staggering. It is sometimes hard enough to get support from a GP when you actually do suffer from depression. I had a friend who who was working in adult care and hated her job. She was also suffering from really bad post natal depression and asked that some adjustments be made to her working hours. She asked for flexible working hours. That request was supported by her GP who said she was suffering from reactive depression. That request was denied.

Her ex husbands employer was the one who gave him flexible working hours so the kids could be dropped off at nursery and picked up. Her employer put someone on a written warning because they took time off after they had a miscarriage IN work.

There are people working in miserable jobs that makes their mental health worse. I have worked in several horrible jobs that led to me having to be signed off work because of bullying and put on anti depressants.

Do people not understand when they are posting just go to work and that will help your mental health that some peoples jobs actually cause mental health issues in the first place?

JollyDenimSeal · 05/05/2026 12:50

And apparently disability benefits are Very very very high? You do realise that not everyone with disabilities gets both lwcra and Pip /adp and some people on Pip/adp will get one component and not the other.

Lwrca is just over 400 pounds a month. It's just been halved for new claimants
There are people who need disability benefits to help them to live day to day. To help them stay in work. To help them with equipment they need to power because of disabilities

If someone is on UC and is over 25 and single and gets Lwcra they'll be living on just over 800 pounds a month.

Why is it that it's always disabled people who are grudged benefits? A relative of mine got attendance allowance only after a fall at home and two heart attacks. She needed some adjustments to allow her to remain at home. The point is - you don't know when your life might change and you might need to claim yourself

There are other European countries that spend more than the UK on disability benefits. I personally think we have become so conditioned to think that everyone on benefits has such a cushy life that when people realise that disabled people get more - some people don't like it.

I was told multiple times when I was on basic UC how good I had it. Less than 400 pounds a month

Oh and the disdain for people with mental health is obvious and some of the rhetoric is completely damaging - just go to work and you won't have mental health issues. You'll get better. Work is the answer

JollyDenimSeal · 05/05/2026 12:31

Walkyrie · 03/05/2026 23:03

Well it used to be vaccines, health and safety, universal healthcare, a proper sewage and water system and better maternity care. But obviously thats not working any more

You do realise that some people are disabled because of accidents?

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