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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think you need to clean for “guests”

193 replies

CleanHouseForNow · 03/05/2026 21:19

We have family visiting tomorrow for lunch. A planned meal with about 15 people. We see them regularly but not often at home.

In the interests of full disclosure we have a cleaner who does 3 hours once a week. I think in addition we need to:
> Deep clean the kitchen
> Mop the floor of the whole downstairs
> Deep clean downstairs toilet
> Remove all clutter from downstairs
> Wipe all downstairs surfaces
> Empty downstairs bins
> Hoover upstairs
> Deep clean upstairs bathroom

This is the minimum. I would actually do more if time permitted.

DH thinks it is WAY too much and would probably just wipe down the kitchen and spray some air freshener in the bathrooms. AIBU?

OP posts:
Original poster
CleanHouseForNow · 03/05/2026 21:57

mondaytosunday · 03/05/2026 21:34

What does your cleaner do if you have to do all that? I’d clean the downstairs loo (what kind of deep clean does that need? And vacuum but I’m not going to become a different person and no one would be going upstairs so no need to touch that. Emptying the bins seems like a normal task don’t you do that anyway?

We empty the bins on a Thursday before the cleaner comes. We have 15 people coming, I’ll empty them again so they don’t appear manky or so the guests (my family) don’t feel uncomfortable if there is already something in them 😬

OP posts:
EdithStourton · 03/05/2026 21:55

I wouldn't deep clean (as in, I wouldn't clean out my kitchen cupboards), but I would give the place a bloody good spruce up.

Tel12 · 03/05/2026 21:53

Gealach · 03/05/2026 21:26

If I didn’t throughly clean for guests we would live in a shithole.

Sometimes i invite people around just to force myself to deep clean. I was hoovering the other day and my DS asked me if we were having guests 🤣

My daughter in law was vaccuming and GS asked if Nanny was coming!

Original poster
CleanHouseForNow · 03/05/2026 21:52

When I visit people I’m interested in spending time with them
I hope my guests are like you @Scoreagoal but I do notice if I’m in someone’s house and the bathroom is a bit… used. I want them to not find fault and I can’t relax if I know no one has wiped the toilet down etc

OP posts:
Esperanza25 · 03/05/2026 21:51

Gosh, I’d never do all this! I’d make sure the downstairs toilet and sink were super clean and that everywhere was tidy and that would be it!

Gealach · 03/05/2026 21:51

Pearlstillsinging · 03/05/2026 21:48

I'd be very disappointd if i was paying a cleaner and needed to do all that extra cleaning 2 days later!

Cleaners just do your standard maintenance clean really. It will keep the place ok but you’ll still need to do deeper cleans 4-6 times a year. Maybe even more.

doitwithlove · 03/05/2026 21:50

Your cleaning suggestions all will take time, as long as upstairs bathroom and downstairs toilet are cleaned, smelling fresh and kitchen is smelling good-sink bleached, clean tea towels and washing up scourers. The other clutter etc can be put into an under-stair cupboard

Gwenhwyfar · 03/05/2026 21:49

As for the bins, I live in a flat so I can only take them out on bin day.
Are you saying that visitors expect bins to be empty?

Pearlstillsinging · 03/05/2026 21:48

I'd be very disappointd if i was paying a cleaner and needed to do all that extra cleaning 2 days later!

JLou08 · 03/05/2026 21:48

I always make sure my house is clean for guests. I don't judge anyone for being untidy, but if I'm in a home that isn't clean, especially if I'm eating there, I feel really, really uncomfortable, so I wouldn't want that for my guests.

redskyAtNigh · 03/05/2026 21:48

CleanHouseForNow · 03/05/2026 21:45

I don’t know why I’m like this

100% because of my mother @Pumpkinmagic. She hated having visitors and was always cleaning crazy before they came.

So break the cycle. Clean less, enjoy having your visitors.

Gwenhwyfar · 03/05/2026 21:47

If I had guests coming today I wouldn't do anything except double check the toilet and sink because the place is already quite clean (as is yours). I'd maybe hide my used towels and put a clean hand towel in the bathroom.

If they were staying overnight, the bathroom would get a more thorough clean because they'd be using the shower, maybe wanting to leave their night clothes on the floor, but just for lunch, no there would be no need for such a deep clean.

Gealach · 03/05/2026 21:47

a word of warning to people saying you don’t need to do upstairs. My aunt visited me, she is very pass remarkable, spends most of her time housekeeping.

So I scrub the place top to bottom before she comes. It’s not awful because we have a cleaner but I did all the skirting, cleaned down the front of the cupboards, pulled everything out. Everything. Then while I was busy with the children , she actually went upstairs and opened all the doors to the bedrooms where she found all the shite and clutter I had a thrown in, in a panic.

redskyAtNigh · 03/05/2026 21:47

CleanHouseForNow · 03/05/2026 21:39

I think there are things that we don't notice normally but visitors would.

@SometimesThingsHappen it’s exactly this. The cleaner whizzes around the house and gives everything a light touch. If the toilet has a few marks since Friday, I think people would notice and chucking bleach down it wouldn’t do the job. I shudder at the thought my Dad might lift the loo seat to wee and there was a stain on it 🤮

If you had the cleaner round on Friday I don't think you need more than a quick hoover of downstairs, make sure downstairs loo is clean and wipe surfaces in the kitchen. And you'd be doing at least some of that anyway (would you really not clean the toilet if there were visible marks, even without guests?)

But then if visitors come round to check the standard of my cleanliness they would find themselves uninvited quite quickly.

Scoreagoal · 03/05/2026 21:46

CleanHouseForNow · 03/05/2026 21:41

@Scoreagoal in case they go upstairs for the loo

Ok - so if only loo is upstairs - that’s less than 5 mins to hoover the stairs and landing to the loo if you must???!!!!

i’m no domestic goddess but if someone went upstairs to use the loo unexpectedly - I’d not be bothered 1 even if I’d not hoovered that day…

I clean normally for my family and my house is ‘ok’ not perfect but just normal - and guests can just take me as I am.

don’t over think this! They are family and surely expect you to find a normal family home - not a palace???

Original poster
CleanHouseForNow · 03/05/2026 21:45

I don’t know why I’m like this

100% because of my mother @Pumpkinmagic. She hated having visitors and was always cleaning crazy before they came.

OP posts:
justasking111 · 03/05/2026 21:45

The cleaner and I prep together to get everything done. Then on the morning just a quick dash round the bathrooms. As for the kitchen dh does the prep and catering so it's on him on the day

basoon · 03/05/2026 21:43

I would definitely do this and I'm not very house proud

Original poster
CleanHouseForNow · 03/05/2026 21:41

@Scoreagoal in case they go upstairs for the loo

OP posts:
Freddobar · 03/05/2026 21:41

Clean, scrub everything in sight.
If we have visitors I scrub and clean everything on top of what a cleaner would do. That's the Irish way.
Even if your house is clean again the Irish way is to apologise for the mess.
Nothing is ever going to be good enough for guests so why bother trying. Never left your guests go upstairs

OnTheBoardwalk · 03/05/2026 21:39

I had a friend over last week, I did a clean the night before but not a big tidy

i have my bestest special friend that comes over twice a year. She gets a proper clean pulling everything out, even cleaning plug holes etc. I’m not sure if she cares but it makes me do it

TheChosenTwo · 03/05/2026 21:39

CleanHouseForNow · 03/05/2026 21:33

How deep is the deep clean? I’m on my knees cleaning the bathroom floor tiles.

I also pull the sofas out to hoover.

Show quote history

Okay no I wouldn’t be on my hands and knees, I use the floor steamer and I do pull out sofas every 2 months or so but not something i’d specifically be doing before people come round.
i don’t know, we have people round all the time so presume they’re perfectly happy to be fed and watered here therefore it’s clean enough!

Ilovecheeseyah · 03/05/2026 21:39

Yes I think it is important but the warmth of your smile, yummy food and fresh hair and outfit is more important for me personally :-)
what I am saying is; don’t exhaust yourself , it is but one metric and warmth wins for me hands down. I have been so tired cleaning sometimes, I want the guests to bog off by the time they arrive!!

Original poster
CleanHouseForNow · 03/05/2026 21:39

I think there are things that we don't notice normally but visitors would.

@SometimesThingsHappen it’s exactly this. The cleaner whizzes around the house and gives everything a light touch. If the toilet has a few marks since Friday, I think people would notice and chucking bleach down it wouldn’t do the job. I shudder at the thought my Dad might lift the loo seat to wee and there was a stain on it 🤮

OP posts:
Original poster
CleanHouseForNow · 03/05/2026 21:35

Gealach · 03/05/2026 21:26

If I didn’t throughly clean for guests we would live in a shithole.

Sometimes i invite people around just to force myself to deep clean. I was hoovering the other day and my DS asked me if we were having guests 🤣

😆 I think my husband’s objections have started since I allocated him tasks…

OP posts: