Stick your fundraiser - the hardest test will be leaving my children for so long

No, the baby won't care about the reason, but that doesn't make it ok? Personally, I wouldn't judge someone in the military for having to leave their family for a long period of time. But doing it for a charity bike ride? I'm afraid I would. Especially if they have a tiny baby and a toddler with additional needs. The 6 year old might be able to understand better but I'm sure it will still be very upsetting for them too. I'm sure there are a myriad of other less damaging ways to raise money

She’s being bloody ASKED to be invested in it by giving money!!!

FFS

It’s quite unusual it’s the woman, but not unheard of. My friend is in the film industry and stopped whilst her child was small.

Mrs Attenborough is also a bit of a hero

'Social value leave ' ....well iv heard it all now

If we are only outraged at things that are bugger all to do with us mumsnet would have to close down 😁

Yes it would. I'd be much more willing to sponsor someone who was actually doing something useful.

What a dick comment! 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

Ughh this is infuriating. Leaving her with a newborn as well!

I bet in three years time he’ll be telling the other men on the school run that the divorce came “out of nowhere”.

Same. If you want to go cycle round Africa just go and do it - there’s no need to make such a big song and dance about it. If you can afford to take the time off work, buy yourself a £5k bike, a grands worth of cycling gear, and another three grands worth of flights and subsistence for a couple of months, you can afford to chuck a few grand at the charity yourself.

And I hope your wife has a few weeks holiday booked for when you return and can pick up the reins again.

3-4 months!

I don’t know about forgetting as such but the report talks about the impact of sustained separation.

Glad you are so special to know better.

So children do forget their parents? Because that is what was being discussed

Couldn’t agree with you more.
His poor wife.

There was a very recent report about the negative impact on Armed Forces families children, called ‘Thriving Lives’.

It is a big ask to be in the armed forces precisely because it expects and compels parents to make this kind of decision. I have a lot of regard for any scheme or proposal to improve support for armed forces families.

It makes it even more bizarre that someone would choose to do so voluntarily.

It is also a known academic phenomenon whereby male anthropologists freely go off to remote places and immerse themselves in observing people without outside contact for months at a time, whereas female anthropologists cannot always do the same. Yes of course there are exceptional female anthropologists, but it is still a recognised issue.

Ive never got why people do this other than for ego!! The amount that has to be raised/paid to cover vists etc must means that the actual profit to the charity has to be so reduced.
These mountain climbs etc are so expensive to do and agree with most people here saying that its a self indulgent hobby holiday!!
And with small kids at home you are a dick of a 'D'H

Even if the wife was in favour of this, it's still massively selfish and irresponsible to leave young children for this length of time, to pursue a hobby.

We bring children into the world and we owe it to them to actually be present and parent!

Women very rarely abandon their newborns and small dc in order to go on extended holidays. Any woman who did, would rightly receive criticism for being a crappy parent.
If my h did this, I'd tell him to not come back. If the wife is supporting this, then she's also supporting the abandonment of her children by their father. In 4 months time the newborn will have changed so much!

And wanting other people to finance this ego trip is massively entitled. If people must do these things, they should at least self finance.

There will also be colleagues at work who have to pick up his work while he's gone - I wonder if they mind. Or maybe they consider it to be a price worth paying so they get a break from him banging on about how wonderful he is!

But the point was if a child is away from their parent for a length of time they would forget their parent, so it wouldnt matter if a parent find finding themselves in tibet by building a yurt, flying to the moon or staring at their navel in Bali so the reason behind it wont change anything

It could be that he is an otherwise fantastic partner and father, and that his partner enjoys lots of leisure time at other times.

Unlikely though.

See, I don’t mind this as much. It’s nice when teens do something so out of their normal experience and if that means they’re baking cakes and babysitting kids to fund it, I can live with it.

Adults asking others to fund a cycle or their Kilimanjaro trek while leaving their kids and spouses at home? Not so much.

At four months old? Probably yes. Im not sure of the inner workings of a small babys mind but they're not that bright are they? The military is at least a bit more understandable than a bike ride.

What about parents in the army or navy they get posted to other places some times do they really forget their parents?

I was literally about to say the same thing. Who the heck leaves kids of those ages for that amount of time?? How confusing for the 3 year old! The baby will probably think he's gone forever and forget about him. Its madness.

Rattle a tin yourself for abandoned single mothers with disabled children.

(With her approval of course.)

P.s. many charities have banned rattling/shaking buckets as you can technically shake a bucket, but you can't annoy people. Might be worth looking at the Fundraising Regulator guidance if you'd like them to be less present in the village https://www.fundraisingregulator.org.uk/code/standards-which-apply-specific-fundraising-methods/public-fundraising