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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to not want them to drop in randomly to watch trains?

234 replies

FlatPat · 03/05/2026 11:30

I’ve recently moved to a home that’s close to a train station and opposite the track. A friend and her son who is autistic(As am I) have randomly appeared to see X or Y train. Most of the trains that pass are your standard passenger or freight trains but we do have a few better/well known ones passing through.

I don’t mind them visiting the odd time with advance warning but not just dropping in randomly especially as you can go to the train station to see them pass through or get almost the same view from elsewhere though I appreciate it’s more comfortable sitting in someone’s living room.

AIBU to gently suggest that they go to the train station instead?

TIA

OP posts:
Original poster
FlatPat · 03/05/2026 12:05

Shittyyear2025 · 03/05/2026 12:00

Nah. I'm a secret train spotter and wouldn't dream of dropping into a friend's home to catch one when there's a perfectly adequate station not far away. That's just rude.

...we have ways of finding out if anything fancy is passing by...

What are these ways please? I rather enjoy watching them but know nothing about them.

OP posts:
HermioneWeasley · 03/05/2026 12:05

If you aren’t prepared to say something just don’t answer the door? 🤷

Original poster
FlatPat · 03/05/2026 12:03

If there’s a famous train passing through and she wants to come here for an hour and lets me know in advance that’s fine but I don’t want to have random visitors because it stresses me out. I do feel bad though because I know that it gives him a lot of pleasure but I can’t do random drop ins.

OP posts:
Shittyyear2025 · 03/05/2026 12:00

Nah. I'm a secret train spotter and wouldn't dream of dropping into a friend's home to catch one when there's a perfectly adequate station not far away. That's just rude.

...we have ways of finding out if anything fancy is passing by...

Mamainthelights · 03/05/2026 12:00

You are being very unreasonable

Original poster
FlatPat · 03/05/2026 12:00

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

I’m not bashing autistic people. I am autistic as I mentioned. My friend isn’t but her son is. I’m not blaming him. It’s perfectly understandable that he wants to watch the trains but I don’t want anyone dropping in randomly, regardless of the reason(Besides my parents).

OP posts:
mumofoneAloneandwell · 03/05/2026 11:58

This reply has been deleted

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Thecatandme · 03/05/2026 11:58

FlatPat · 03/05/2026 11:44

And out of curiosity, for any train lovers here, how do you know which trains will be passing through as opposed to those that stop at the station?

Timetables

If the son is a train enthusiast there are websites that show live running etc

Original poster
FlatPat · 03/05/2026 11:44

And out of curiosity, for any train lovers here, how do you know which trains will be passing through as opposed to those that stop at the station?

OP posts: