Do you privately judge women who’ve had a high number of sexual partners?

I've had at least 40 sexual partners. I've been judged. Do I care? no fucking way!

And how exactly does that affect you? How do you show this supposed care in public, not just this platform? Maybe you don't like sex or feel sexual shame. That's no one's problem but yours.

No I wouldn’t judge them at all.

Only misogynists care about body count.

Yes, I’d probably assume they weren’t good at relationships or at being alone, and were wandering about using people in a transient and unfulfilling manner for want of anything more nutritious.

Of course not. It's the 2020s not the 1950s. And it's nothing to do with me what other people do with their bodies anyway.

No I don't care, I just hope they were all consensual, safe and happy encounters.

I honestly have no idea how many sexual partners my woman friends have had. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Is that a topic of conversation that comes up often? I have one particular friend who I know has certainly slept with a lot, I’d guess a couple hundred if I was a betting woman. She is an absolute drunken hot mess who has never consistently held down a job because she truly refuses to get out of bed before 11am.

I do judge her for being such a hot mess, but I don’t care how many people she’s had sex with. She was my MOH (so I’m obviously quite fond of her, despite her messiness) and famously had sex with a male friend of Dh and I on the sofa of my family’s holiday cottage after my wedding. My 60 something year old auntie tossed a condom down the stairs to them. My auntie was herself off on a European grand tour after and clearly had come well stocked, which brought me so much joy. 😂

I am just reading about Kay Francis, a Hollywood actress, very big in the 1930s, and I have lost count of the number of abortions she's had, after 8. She kept diaries throughout her life with entries like; 'Maurice Chevalier fucked me 4 times in 2 hours'... and she seems to have had countless partners.

I suppose it is more surprise & prurient interest than judging them! It's always interesting to read about how other women have led their lives. Kay Francis reminds me of Tallulah Bankhead, as both women seem to be very much into non emotional recreational sex and were bisexual. Then there are other Hollywood actresses like Joan Crawford & Bette Davis who used sex as power and would ensure that they slept with their directors so they could gain some control over the production and especially over the other actresses in it. Marlene Dietrich had sex with everyone, but especially her co-stars as she needed her leading men to be in love with her. During WWII she was on the frontline servicing the soldiers as she felt that they 'should have the chance to sleep with a beautiful movie star before going to their death....' As revealed by her daughter, Maria. Dietrich's reasons seemed to have been narcissistic, as she later claimed to her daughter that she didn't even like sex!

As a teenage ex convent schoolgirl we were all obsessed with the erotic writer Anais Nin, who was really popular in the 1980s and some sort of feminist icon. It was very, very racy at the time... Later it was revealed that she'd been a bigamist, had wrote about knowingly committing incest with her father as an adult women ('seducing' her father, she called it!). Later her second husband, Rupert, released the unedited diaries (Nin edited them extensively for publication removing all references to the fact that she'd been married and her first husband, Hugo, a wealthy banker had bankrolled her artistic lifestyle) and it painted a different picture. Reading these versions in the 2000s, I'll admit that when she writes about walking the street of NY with the semen of three different men inside her on her way to meet a 4th lover, I am revolted. It all seemed rather pathological as if she went through her life using sex as a form of validation and for narcissistic reasons or she that may have been a nymphomaniac. Then she was compelled to write it all down.

Perhaps it is not the sex itself but to speculate about the reason behind that is more interesting. A lot of these studio actresses in the 1930s were working a six day week in a factory style production churning out film after film, so you could also argue that the sex was a form of physical release. There was also a degree of narcissism, especially if your employer is promoting you as a 'love goddess' or 'femme fatale.'

Even today, it is interesting that some women need constant male attention while others are happy with Wordle.

No I would not.

I would personally judge a man with a high number of sexual partners more than a woman.

What do you mean by judge? It's no skin off my nose so I don't care.
There is one aspect about it that annoys me and that's when women boast about it.
It's not an achievement as the vast majority of men aren't that fussy.
It doesn't really work in reverse as more women are more fussy.
I guess this is where the stud vs slut dynamic comes in.

But no I wouldn't feel any less about the person unless I suppose I was getting into a relationship with them-even then it would be unease, like am I number 51- not judgement- but as I'm heterosexual that's irrelevant

This again?! We had one last week about this!

Knowing most men, I can't think of 60 I have met that I would happily sleep with, so I would assume the woman has very low standards

This is pretty much how I think. My social circle are far from the dreads of society, however most men I have met and then dated, I don’t consider worthy or good enough to sleep with me (because of their attitude and how they treat/talk to me, their lifestyle..) I can only imagine women who have had 60 sexually partners have a very low bar. There’s more low quality disrespectful men than there are good ones.

Weirdly, we have had a spate of this type of question in the last week or so. The fact that this question is asked only about woman is very revealing as to the attitudes of posters.

Yes I judge them but not in a negative light
absolutely fair play to them each to there own

No. I don't know how many partners other women have had. I don't ask anyone and I have no interest in knowing that about anyone I might be seeing.

I think there's a whole lot of valid analysis around the pressure to say no becoming the pressure to say yes, and the reason many women had a lot one night stands that they now regret etc, but I don't judge the number in itself.

No.
I don't give a shit how many people anyone has slept with. i cant imagine a situation where I would even ask that question. (I have never even asked my husband and he has never asked me)

A lot of the people who are claiming "no I would not judge", I think would react differently if they heard that the person they had started dating had had sex with 60 people or more.

I certainly woukd ask myself if:

• that person is only able to have casual sex and struggles with anything more meaningful
• whether they are low standards in term of they choose
• whether they lack self esteem ans somehow use sex to try to validate themselves.

That applies to women and men.

So although ultimately I think people are free to have as many partners as they want, I also know that I would not find them suitable for a relationship with me.

When I was younger, I probably would have judged. Now I’ve lived a bit longer and had more sex, no, not at all. Sorry to those who were unknowingly judged by me in the past.

Honestly, I'd think it was gross if anyone, male or female, had slept with lots of people. I don't spend much time thinking about random people's sexual history, though, so unless I'm considering a relationship with someone or they bring it up themselves, it likely wouldn't cross my mind.

I probably wouldn't know; it's not really my-business.

I would inwardly judge them IF and ONLY IF they were repeatedly cheating on a partner, or trying to get others to cheat on their partners, Otherwise, up to them.

And having teeth, and how she smiles.

Oh dear OP have you ever known anyone on MN post anything judgemental.
The whole thing would be preposterous.
😉😁😂.

Wouldn't the simplest assumption be that they'd met twice as many men as you, not that their standards were half as high?