This is bonkers mummy behaviour

My muscles are fine thanks for asking. 😉
Just have an opinion like everyone else on here including you.

She might well know that physically picking her child up and restraining them is the point they wrestle free and run for the exit (happened to me) or that it triggers such a bad melt down that it takes about 6 hours for everyone to recover afterwards!

But the OP and you have no idea how this woman raises her child, it was a snapshot….

She might be on edge worrying about avoiding a melt down for everyone’s sake. If you have a child with SEN then swimming pool changing rooms are THE WORST place for a meltdown. Confined cubicles, echoing surfaces, lots of chatter, smells… she’s probably treading on eggshells just waiting.

I eventually stopped taking my DD swimming because of the changing rooms.

No wonder there are so many snowflakes out there.
Aand it’s only going to get worse …

Hope you did some stretching before you made that massive reach, you might have pulled a muscle!

You really think this is a good way to bring up your kid as your best friend? Do you gentle parent?
Personally I couldn't give a shit how other people raise their kids, They are the ones having to deal with the shit storm that eventually comes along and society has to get on with it.

Allowing your child to make choices can go too far.

You are the parent. They do expect you to lead the way. To choose, to tell them, to guide them.

Why does one grown woman refer to another grown woman as ‘a mummy’? It’s so infantilising. Mummy is a name for small children to use, not adults.

It's a parenting website ffs and ages talking about a parenting trend! She's not identified the person in any way.

That’s quite sad. Another sign of why it’s so important to work on your own anxiety in order to be a better parent. Parenting is hard and stressful, but children thrive when they feel safe and secure with boundaries. The sad part is that he’s trying to save his children from unpleasant feelings (because they stress him) and that’s not doing them any favours. Children who are told “no” seem more likely to grow into adults more capable of the kind of self-regulation that society and individual success (however you define it) demand.

Parents do seem scared of their own small children now, but I don’t actually think that’s it. They are scared of social media.
Anything we do in public can be recorded, shared, and go viral.
So, you grab your kid and make them get in the pushchair- your child screams blue murder- you’re all over the internet as an abusive parent.
It’s the same reason a lot of teens won’t dance in public, or middle aged women won’t challenge bad behaviour. Who want to be all over the internet as a dork or a Karen?
We live in a world of constant ridicule and judgement.
Fortunately I don’t care, am not on sm (other than here) and could well be Karening all over TikTok but would be none the wiser.
For this generation of young parents though, they are paralysed with anxiety- and I get it.

It’s easy to judge from a small snapshot, maybe the parent was anxious she would get judged for getting the hump or being firmer with her child.

Maybe she had a shit morning and just did not want to deal with a meltdown, which toddlers are prone to do, I know I pick my battles sometimes.

I have a large age gap between my kids and I definitely parented the older one differently to my youngest. I imagine none of us get it right all of the time.

I can’t believe how many people are reaching to the fact the child is doomed from this one moment 🤣🤣🤣

You’re all like old biddys over the fence in the olden days bitching about the young mothers of the neighbourhood.

I know someone like this and their kid is their 'best friend' kid has refusing to go to school on an off for years. Runs the house hold is now a tween.
Parent struggles as a result but can't see they have created the problems from a very young age. Kid is still their best friend.
Doesn't understand best friends don't tell you to go to bed, do your home work, help around the house and generally have respect.

This thread is literally about a snap shot of this woman’s day.

When you’re a parent you might try all sorts, I myself have mixed between gentle parenting, losing my rag and screeching (rarely and regretted it, wouldn’t have wanted anyone posting about it on mumsnet), and then a mixed approach.

This woman might never use this approach again. What about all the other amazing things she might be doing that day? Surviving sleepless nights? Providing nutritious food to a child that won’t eat it? Potty training?

What if it was her first time at the swimming baths?

Ah, but I dare say some would argue that taking Joe firmly by the hand into a cubicle, stripping his wet things off and drying him - without his express permission! - amounts to assault. ‘His body, his choice!’ - and all that sort of bollocks.

I was parented in this style - really not ideal either.

Is it any wonder when you have people like OP publicly critiquing other parents?

It's not about this individual mum though, it's more that it is a parenting trend.
20 years ago this would have been very strange and unusual parenting but now I'd say a good 50% of families with under 5s parent this way. It's been a huge cultural shift.

Ridiculous. I agree just pick him up, wrap him in a towel and get changed.

This could be my brother in law. He is terrified of his children crying / making a scene and so faffs around pandering to their every whim. And then wonders why he’s left behind (literally in some cases … in this example we would have been dressed and had a coffee / snack by the time he comes out. So we’re ready to leave and his child hasn’t had a snack… round in circles we go again etc )
I think it’s rooted in his own anxiety

Yep. Green cup or blue cup, fine. Of course some age appropriate choices are fine.
But letting them think they are in charge? Not fine.

I have friends who are teachers who say the same. Most of them want to leave teaching as soon as they can now.

I wonder how many of us would come out smelling of roses if someone saw all the snapshots of our parenting.

There is something really bitchy about posting about a mum in this way. Let alone going home thinking about her long enough to write the post.