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Friend’s awful dress and my reaction

984 replies

SummerFate · 02/05/2026 15:28

A friend is mine is quite heavily into fashion and spends a lot on clothes. Some of her choices are quite bold and not necessarily what I would pick, but she has a good figure and is quite distinctive looking, so can generally pull off something a bit more “out there”.

However, yesterday she showed me the dress she has spent a fortune on for an event - and it’s hideous. Not “not to my taste” - objectively hideous. And my face reacted before my brain could tell it to keep quiet.

She could tell immediately that I thought it was awful and she looked really upset. She said straight out, “You hate it, don’t you?”, and while I tried to say it just wasn’t my personal cup of tea, it was too late. It was obvious I hated it. I said we all have different tastes, what suits her wouldn’t suit me and that I’ve seen things look amazing on her that I could never wear, but the rest of the evening was really awkward.

I’ve messaged this morning saying I’m sorry if I upset her and that I didn’t mean to, and that she shouldn’t let what I think affect her choice. She hasn’t replied.

How do I fix this? Do I just hope it blows over? I know I should have tried to hide my thoughts, but when she said she’d spent twice what I pay a month for my mortgage, I was expecting something amazing - I just couldn’t hide my reaction when I saw this monstrosity.

OP posts:
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Tikitaka20 · 03/05/2026 00:28

RawBloomers · 03/05/2026 00:22

What exactly is wrong with OP not liking the dress? She didn't tell her friend that her friend shouldn't like it, or that it was bad of her friend to have chosen it. she just didn't like it.

The entitlement inherent in this idea that a friend must not show an opinion at odds with your own is pretty breathtaking. It's the friend who is the effort here, not OP.

There is nothing wrong with OP not liking the dress. There is something wrong though with OP using this thread to get reassurance from others about the incident while simultaneously laughing with everyone about how awful the dress was and effectively laughing at her friend behind her back. That is what is wrong.

Tikitaka20 · 03/05/2026 00:26

SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:23

Of course I fucking disagree 😆😆

Okay. So you think you behaved bravely. How were you brave?

Tikitaka20 · 03/05/2026 00:25

SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:22

You really can’t decipher the simplest of posts, can you?

Yes, I can. You could have been kind to your friend but chose not to be. Your friend will remember that. Unless you have a genuine reason why you couldn’t show some manners and consideration for your friend’s dress, you should feel ashamed.

SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:23

Tikitaka20 · 03/05/2026 00:18

Yes, cowardly. Do you disagree? Do you think you were brave?

Of course I fucking disagree 😆😆

OP posts:
SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:22

Tikitaka20 · 02/05/2026 21:29

Sure. She purposely hurt her friend’s feelings where she says ‘my face reacted before my brain could tell it to keep quiet. She could tell immediately that I thought it was awful and she looked really upset.’ She decided not to show any tact or diplomacy, and really upset her friend. I’m presuming she’s a grown woman who normally knows how to behave and has good manners. Would it have killed her to have behaved kindly with her friend?

You really can’t decipher the simplest of posts, can you?

OP posts:
RawBloomers · 03/05/2026 00:22

Tikitaka20 · 02/05/2026 19:39

OP only soothed the friend after she made it clear she didn’t like the dress. Yet she’s now bitching about the dress here with everyone else whilst asking everyone to make her feel better. I can understand why her friend is so upset. Surely OP isn’t worth the effort?

What exactly is wrong with OP not liking the dress? She didn't tell her friend that her friend shouldn't like it, or that it was bad of her friend to have chosen it. she just didn't like it.

The entitlement inherent in this idea that a friend must not show an opinion at odds with your own is pretty breathtaking. It's the friend who is the effort here, not OP.

Tikitaka20 · 03/05/2026 00:18

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Yes, cowardly. Do you disagree? Do you think you were brave?

SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:17

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Namechangingregularly · 03/05/2026 00:16

I’m on my own here for sure but the more I look at this dress the more I love it. It’s the fact that it’s like a young child’s dream party dress. You’d need to be stunning to wear it and look great though but maybe your friend knows what she can wear. Good for her. And if you don’t like the dress that shouldn’t be a huge problem.

chaosmaker · 03/05/2026 00:12

it isn't even a dress, it's a toilet roll cover of the type that were knitted/crocheted in the 70's

SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:12

SurferRona · 02/05/2026 20:42

Really? So your very on point friend, fashion wise, has selected a dress which was previously discussed on Mumsnet a few years ago? 🧐🤨🧐🤨

I doubt she checks Mumsnet before shopping.

OP posts:
SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:11

Tikitaka20 · 03/05/2026 00:10

Not sure - they sometimes do. I used to work in journalism and we sometimes deleted articles if needed. Your friend may have seen it, or perhaps not. Maybe text her to check? That might help put your mind at ease.

My mind was never not at ease.

OP posts:
SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:10

Dodorogers · 02/05/2026 20:33

Tbf you do sound totally lacking in humour at least your friend has a sense of fun

😆😆😆

OP posts:
Tikitaka20 · 03/05/2026 00:10

SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:09

Why would they do that?

Not sure - they sometimes do. I used to work in journalism and we sometimes deleted articles if needed. Your friend may have seen it, or perhaps not. Maybe text her to check? That might help put your mind at ease.

SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:09

Tikitaka20 · 03/05/2026 00:07

It was definitely there earlier. They may have deleted it 🤷‍♀️

Why would they do that?

OP posts:
SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:08

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SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:08

user233675892 · 03/05/2026 00:07

You're spiralling quite fast now @SummerFate

Spiralling?

OP posts:
Tikitaka20 · 03/05/2026 00:08

SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:07

Nah, it’s being a drama queen.

No. It’s called being nice. But that doesn’t come to you naturally. My condolences.

SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:08

So you didn't like it. Why did you pretend you did when she asked?

I didn’t. That’s kind of the whole point of the thread.

OP posts:
user233675892 · 03/05/2026 00:07

You're spiralling quite fast now @SummerFate

Tikitaka20 · 03/05/2026 00:07

SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:06

I did.

Someone is having you on.

It was definitely there earlier. They may have deleted it 🤷‍♀️

SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:07

Tikitaka20 · 03/05/2026 00:05

That’s not being a drama queen. I think it’s called… being nice? You should try it.

Nah, it’s being a drama queen.

OP posts:
SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:06

Tikitaka20 · 03/05/2026 00:06

Sometimes their articles don’t come up on Google. Try the main homepage.

I did.

Someone is having you on.

OP posts:
SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:06

ThreadGuardDog · 02/05/2026 20:10

What on earth do you think your friends’ choice in clothes has to do with you ?

Nothing - until she shows it to me and asks what I think. I would have thought that was fairly simple to work out.

OP posts:
Tikitaka20 · 03/05/2026 00:06

SummerFate · 03/05/2026 00:05

Try Googling it. It doesn’t come up.

Sometimes their articles don’t come up on Google. Try the main homepage.

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