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Original poster

Fed up with ladish DP and his mate

231 replies

Hauelzk · 02/05/2026 09:43

Couples night out yesterday - we got the train to the next city, and got the last one home. A boozy evening, really nice time.

DP and this particular friend are big in to their football and can be a bit ‘ladish’ after a few drinks. I roll me eyes usually as does his mates wife.

The station platform was really busy and a staff member was trying to move people. He did become a bit abrupt and some people accused him of being rude, I think he was just stressed.

Anyway, he kind of tripped and just about stopped himself from falling over.

Lots of people cheered, and then DP and his mate started a football chant aimed at him - “you fat bastard” which some others joined in with.

I felt sorry for the bloke. DP says he was being rude so got some deserved stick and it was ‘only lighthearted’.

Am I being a killjoy as he put it?

OP posts:
TheCurious0range · 02/05/2026 10:43

My brother is a tradesman complete with 'banter' with his friends, there is no way he'd start calling a stranger doing their job a fat bastard. Your husband is awful.

Sprinkleofspice · 02/05/2026 10:42

I don’t think he’s just laddish, I think he’s a bit of a dick and I’d be pretty embarrassed to be seen with him. How old is he? If over 25 I don’t think he will change. Imagine being with this man when he’s 50 and still starting football chants at a train station
Also, I wouldn’t call personal comments “robust banter”. He’s not going to be called for the next season of Last One Laughing is he

Aliceinmunsnetland · 02/05/2026 10:40

There might well be a drip feed coming along soon.

Endofyear · 02/05/2026 10:38

What an arsehole 🙄 I'd be embarrassed to be seen with him if he behaved like that. Tosser 😠

Aliceinmunsnetland · 02/05/2026 10:36

And what exactly does this bloke bring into your life? You say you are fed up with his behaviour so why don't you dump him and find a proper man as opposed to someone who acts like a stupid kid?

SingingHinny · 02/05/2026 10:35

Hauelzk · 02/05/2026 10:34

He’s in construction so a very male dominated industry. Which he also points out as being a reason why he’s used to more robust ‘banter’

Show quote history

You seem very invested in finding excuses for his behaviour.

Original poster
Hauelzk · 02/05/2026 10:34

hopspot · 02/05/2026 10:32

When your group was asked by this man to move, did you?

Yea

OP posts:
Original poster
Hauelzk · 02/05/2026 10:34

Ponoka7 · 02/05/2026 10:10

It's bullying behaviour. A person at work can't retaliate. If he was telling people to move for their safety, they should have just done so. What does your DP do for a living?

He’s in construction so a very male dominated industry. Which he also points out as being a reason why he’s used to more robust ‘banter’

OP posts:
hopspot · 02/05/2026 10:32

When your group was asked by this man to move, did you?

Aliceinmunsnetland · 02/05/2026 10:30

Why are you with this moron who seems to have the IQ of 23?
I'm embarrassed on your behalf, doesn't say much for the other woman either that she is dating a knuckle dragging idiot either.
You both need to raise the bar about 100% and please don't have a kid with him the world does not need more twats like your partner and his moronic mates, who really need to grow up.

littleburn · 02/05/2026 10:25

He’s a nasty bully. That’s absolutely vile behaviour. That poor man.

MsSquiz · 02/05/2026 10:25

That’s not “being a lad”, that’s being utterly fucking rude to someone trying to do their job!
if my DH had done that, I would’ve shut him down and walked away!

GCAcademic · 02/05/2026 10:24

Your partner is a low IQ cunt.

ChocHotolate · 02/05/2026 10:24

As someone who works in a service which regularly gets abuse from “laddish” drunk thugs, I can assure you it is not funny.

BePoisedPlumUser · 02/05/2026 10:22

Why are you with such a horrible man?

ACR7 · 02/05/2026 10:21

Wow I wasn’t expecting you to say that. But that’s just nasty and I would have found that humiliating if I was the man

Malinia · 02/05/2026 10:21

Your husband is a nasty arsehole. The real question is what are you going to do about it? I assume he's always been like this?

DeskGnome · 02/05/2026 10:17

If any word of that is true, stop calling him 'laddish' and start calling him wanker.

arethereanyleftatall · 02/05/2026 10:15

so your ‘dp’ is an extremely nasty person. He made a stranger feel like absolute shit. What a horrible horrible thing to do.
i would a billion times over rather be single than spend any time with someone so vile.
i think the fact that you have to ask if you’re being a killjoy rather than immediately ending this ‘relationship’ is nothing short of shocking. Please get some counselling to work out why you are so desperate for a man that you would be with one so vile.

KolaBear · 02/05/2026 10:13

@Hauelzk DP says he (the worker) was being rude so got some deserved stick and it was ‘only lighthearted’.

This is ridiculous. Your DP was the one who was being horribly rude to a man who was just trying to do his job. It’s not ‘laddish’ or ‘lighthearted’ it’s rude and knobbish bullying behaviour. It would give me the massive ick.

TheBeaTgoeson1 · 02/05/2026 10:13

He’s a Bully

Lmnop22 · 02/05/2026 10:12

This is awful behaviour - to taunt a person, call them fat, instigate a chant to humiliate and abuse them at work and to laugh at someone else’s misfortune? And all apparently justified because he was being “abrupt” when trying to keep a platform full of drunks from killing themselves falling under a train?

Ew.

5128gap · 02/05/2026 10:12

That's not 'laddish' its plain nasty. Why should some bloke get abused and humiliated at work because a bunch of thick as mince idiots can't hold their beer? Your partner sounds a nasty piece of work without even any wit or origionality going for him.
You really shouldn't think of this as 'laddish' as it suggests relatively harmless stuff that men just do (boys will be boys) when to abuse and humiliate a transport worker is another level of low life.

AgnesX · 02/05/2026 10:11

Your partner is an arse. He and his mate together are shits.

Not remotely funny.

PS what are his redeeming features.

Ponoka7 · 02/05/2026 10:10

It's bullying behaviour. A person at work can't retaliate. If he was telling people to move for their safety, they should have just done so. What does your DP do for a living?