Anyone else quite enjoy the Empty Nest?

Then I remember I’ve got a golden retriever and realise that’s a whole other level,of drama

😂

I’m one down and one to go. Can’t wait even though I love them desperately. My youngest seems to be the epicentre of so much drama in her friendship group that I just don’t have the energy to deal with it anymore. I’m looking forward to just me and the dog. Then I remember I’ve got a golden retriever and realise that’s a whole other level,of drama 🤯

Yanbu to enjoy it at all. Good for you!

I am not struggling with the empty nest - I've adapted to dd being away easily enough. But I do really miss her and love it when she comes home. I only have one dc though, and she is fabulous company.

When my kids were 16 I rather dreaded the empty nest.

but then one got ill and delayed a levels and the other took a gap year after getting no uni offers and once one had finally gone off to uni the ill one got a it better and restarted her education and then the one at uni finished and came back for a bit while he worked out what he was going to do and then the other one got ill again and repeated a uni year from home…. And and and

so anyway the youngest is now 25 and finally moving out. And frankly now I am very very happy about it, not least because there has been so much (genuine) drama over the last few years that frankly I could do with peace and quiet.

I love my children to bits and enjoy spending time with them, however it’s lovely having the empty nest. Both my children left to go to uni and never came back “home” after graduation which is as it should be. My eldest emigrated and now lived on the other side of the world but we do chat regularly and are fortunate that we can afford to visit and they too can come here. My youngest lives locally and we see him quite often. We’re not in each others pockets but they know we’re here if they need us.

I love having my children and grandchildren visit, but my empty nest is lovely and I have a library 😀

I think my middle DS may eventually leave home but the other two need much more care. I'm unlikely to ever have a situation where I'm not looking after someone.

ME! I love my kids to bits but I’m proud that they are independent and thriving and I am happy to be in this more selfish phase now.

My DC moving to Australia (or any other country) is one of my worst nightmares to be honest. I have them 18-20 miles away and see them 2-3 times a month, and can't imagine having them on the other side of the world/in another country. I love knowing they are close and I can be there for them if they need me, and vice versa.

Slightly different but similar story.. My neighbour who is 35, had her parents move abroad (3000 miles away) 2 years ago, and it has basically wrecked the relationship. She is deeply resentful and angry that they have left her alone with 2 small children (aged 3 & 4,) when she needed them most. I know she should be able to take care of them herself (and she does, with 'help' from her DH occasionally!) but the parental support that her peers have isn't there, so she feels cheated of the support.

She has basically cut them from her life. They made a plan to visit over late December/Christmas, and she and her DH and the 2 DC went on holiday from 18th to 30th December, basically for the whole time they were here. (Her parents stayed at a Travelodge.) It was so awkward. They didn't even know she had gone, and kept popping around to see where she (and her DH and the kids) were. (They came 19th December, then 20th, then 22nd...) On the third visit, a neighbour told them they'd all gone away til New year. (My neighbour knew when her parents were coming and deliberately went away the day before....)

.

I'll let you know if ever happens😂.........late 60s and two 30+ year olds upstairs, they come and go but to date I have never lived on my own to know whether I'd like it or not🤷 one lives abroad though and only see at xmas, definitely wouldn't like it if they all did🤔

Did you worry and were surprised by feeling this happy when you did?

I dreaded DD going to uni and was bereft when she went. But you get used to it, then it becomes normal ... and enjoyable.

I love her being home but she is such a whirlwind of a human - so extrovert and sociable and busy!

I wouldn't be happy if she moved to Australia or never contacted me though.

We actually have DD1 here more than we ever have and she is 20. Before she turned 18 she went 40 per cent or so of the time to her Dads. Now she is with us all the time. DD2 has gone off to uni and the step sons are here half the time-but it used to be the case that DH and I pretty much had every other weekend to ourselves and how we loved it! I miss it now and I don’t see DD1 leaving home any time soon, plus we will have DD2 home for summer shortly and of course the DSS’s as normal. No time to ourselves at all any more :(

I’ve just turned 40 and have a one year old. I am in awe and envious of the 40 year old empty nester!

Love the kids but love them so much more now they don’t live here.

Yes i love it too op.
Im 40 this december, and im enjoying all my freedom now.
Clean tidy home just me now peacefull blissfull.
Nothing in this world would make me go back to the baby stage or school years.

They take pity on you? Ha ha, I bet they're jealous really! 😆

I have a few friends who still have 2 or 3 adult children living at home, and a few (children) are in their mid 30s! Some have never left, and some have left and come back. A few times over.

I know it's hard for some young people to 'launch' and be independent, but I would HATE that. About half a dozen people I know are in their late 50s to early/mid 60s, and started having kids at 22-25, and they still have at least one DC at home! They wait on them hand and foot, and don't get much financial contribution. Even the few who don't have any still at home, spend half their spare time babysitting/looking after grandchildren while the adult children are at work.

I definitely pity all of them! ^

wow, I can’t imagine feeling like this. I’m dreading them going - I worry constantly how sad I’m going to feel. I love their company so much and we do so much together, cooking, movies etc.

Did you worry and were surprised by feeling this happy when you did?

YANBU. My 2 left home at the same time (both went to Uni at the same time as one had a gap year,) and the house was so empty and quiet, and I felt bereft. I missed them terribly to be honest. I LOVED them coming home for Christmas, and then Easter.

But it passed after a while, (a year,) and I got more and more used to the peace and quiet, and having my own bedroom LOL!!! I LOVE it when DH is at work and I have the house to myself.

I would find it very hard to have them living here now, and I think they would find it hard too, after over a decade of independence.

Me! The peace and quiet is wonderful. I live alone and I have a whole bunch of friends who take pitty on me. No, I love being here!

Eldest at uni, so not quite an empty nest yet, but I secretly love it when he’s not here.

House is tidy when I go out and still tidy when I come back and no last minute shopping lists and washing demands or chauffeuring either.

I miss mine being at home tbh. I liked all the bustle and friends round etc.

I didn't enjoy it at first but over time I've got used to the peace and quiet and I love it now. Still feels a bit weird cooking for just DH and I when I've spent the last 30 odd years cooking for a family of 7! I still make too much and have leftovers in the fridge 😂 luckily our adult sons pop in quite often and are always pleased to find some lasagne or beef stew or chicken curry in the fridge to polish off!

I was devastated when dd1 moved away to uni in 2022. But I did get used to more time to myself quite quickly. Now it's an adjustment when she comes home 😊. So it's just OH, me & dd2 for now. I expect dd2 will fly the nest next year & I don't know how I'll be then

I love having plenty of space on the drive for my car & being able to get out of my car instead of squeezing out! And I don't miss playing musical cars when I want to go out 🙂