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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to not have had a night away from my children?

407 replies

Moreroardinosaur · 01/05/2026 19:28

The reason I’m asking is because a colleague is away for the weekend. She came back to work in January after having a baby, so her DD is around 16/17 months now. She also mentioned she had a weekend away in February.

My DS is now five and I have a two year old as well. I’ve yet to have a night away as DD still doesn’t sleep through and I’m not sure DH would wake up / be able to sort her (she can be a bit funny overnight.) Is it just me?

OP posts:
MakingPlans2025 · 01/05/2026 20:31

Yea it’s jus you you’re the only decent mother there has ever been ever well done

Gocheck · 01/05/2026 20:31

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godmum56 · 01/05/2026 20:30

with respect, he'd better learn and you'd better let him learn...what happens when you are ill or injured? It does happen and without warning!

arethereanyleftatall · 01/05/2026 20:28

Fireangels · 01/05/2026 19:48

Other than being in hospital pregnant with DD2 I didn’t have a night away from my DCs until they were 10 and 8. The only time my DH look d after them alone at night was when they were 14 and 12. I went away for work for 3 nights.
DH on the other hand had regular 3 night fishing trips from when DD1 was 4 weeks old 🤷‍♀️

Why didn’t you get divorced?

PinkNeonSign · 01/05/2026 20:28

Mine are 8 and 10 and I’ve never willingly spent nights away from them. I don’t judge anyone who does, I know it’s fine, but I always felt I spent enough time away from them at work and I wanted to be with them in my free time.

EmbarrassmentLovesCompany · 01/05/2026 20:27

I went away with work a number of times (but way less than DH). The most common i got was "who is looking after the kids?" And almost greeted with suprise when DH was the answer.

Id have done much less socializing away from them but wouldn't turn down an offer.

DarkForces · 01/05/2026 20:27

YourShyLion · 01/05/2026 20:07

I have never left mine overnight and never would. People choose to be parents, it's not part time.

My dd left us for a week to go on a school trip. I'll have to tell her that she's a part time daughter 😂

arethereanyleftatall · 01/05/2026 20:26

Isn’t the biggest concern that their father can’t look after them?!?
you what?

ThejoyofNC · 01/05/2026 20:26

YourShyLion · 01/05/2026 20:07

I have never left mine overnight and never would. People choose to be parents, it's not part time.

Don't talk such rubbish. I suppose you're a SAHM then?

Mossstitch · 01/05/2026 20:24

Only time I had a night away from my first two was because I was giving birth to third.........went in at 4.30am had him at 9.30am and home for 2.00pm. Never wanted to be apart from them 🤷

Had 2nd at home as didn't want to leave first by the way 😂 ok i admit I'm a control freak🤣

ainsleysanob · 01/05/2026 20:22

YourShyLion · 01/05/2026 20:07

I have never left mine overnight and never would. People choose to be parents, it's not part time.

Bless.

GasperyJacquesRoberts · 01/05/2026 20:22

YourShyLion · 01/05/2026 20:07

I have never left mine overnight and never would. People choose to be parents, it's not part time.

If you can't trust your partner to get up for a crying child then you're accepting that he is choosing to be a part-time parent.

tofumad · 01/05/2026 20:18

YourShyLion · 01/05/2026 20:07

I have never left mine overnight and never would. People choose to be parents, it's not part time.

Hahaha

tofumad · 01/05/2026 20:17

I voted that you are not being unreasonable because it's your choice. However I left my DS at about 18 months with my DH very happily.

Gocheck · 01/05/2026 20:16

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HelloItsMeYourRobotVaccuum · 01/05/2026 20:15

DH and I both worked rotational night shifts so the other just had to get on with it. Luckily we are all functional humans here so we coped admirably. Grin

GrumpyOldWoman2 · 01/05/2026 20:14

YourShyLion · 01/05/2026 20:07

I have never left mine overnight and never would. People choose to be parents, it's not part time.

Even when they’re 50? Gosh, you’ll be a fun MIL!

Gocheck · 01/05/2026 20:13

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Gocheck · 01/05/2026 20:13

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Swissmeringue · 01/05/2026 20:12

Yabu to not trust your DH to get up with the kids, I'm sure he's perfectly capable of it.

Yanbu to have not had a night away from them, mine are 3 and 7 and I haven't been away overnight without them.

GoodkneeBadKnee · 01/05/2026 20:12

YourShyLion · 01/05/2026 20:07

I have never left mine overnight and never would. People choose to be parents, it's not part time.

Lol.

Clogblog · 01/05/2026 20:11

Each to their own on nights away (I did them from around 8-9m - both breastfed babies but night weaned) - but I would absolutely not be putting up with a DH not doing any night wakings.

Roads · 01/05/2026 20:11

YourShyLion · 01/05/2026 20:07

I have never left mine overnight and never would. People choose to be parents, it's not part time.

It's hard to take anyone seriously when they post such nonsense. Hmm

BabyDoge · 01/05/2026 20:10

YourShyLion · 01/05/2026 20:07

I have never left mine overnight and never would. People choose to be parents, it's not part time.

Give over.

AccidentalPrawnYouFool · 01/05/2026 20:10

Is your DH also an actual baby? Why wouldn’t he wake up? Do you want a night away for something specific? What’s your issue with your colleague having a husband who can clearly cope? Do you think it’s just the mums job to look after the children? You sound like a Martyr. Unless you’re breastfeeding on demand (unlikely now), you should probably get a grip.