AIBU to be fed up with my in-laws' reverse one-upmanship?

I like camping, was talking to my parents about some stuff I had bought for next holiday, all I got was 'that's not camping!, electric lights! blow up mattress! yada yada, my reply? 'I'm astonished you both know so much about camping, I've known you for 63 years now and I've never once known either of you sleep in a tent' The silence was wonderful😂

As I was reading the opening post, I thought "This would make a bloody good comedy sketch"!

They sound really tedious OP, I'd be minded to go low contact with them, and give away very little about where you go etc.

While we’re on Monty Python territory “tis but a flesh wound” might be worth quoting liberally if anyone else takes the piss out of needing plasters!

I agree. "We walked to school in the snow, uphill both ways". I thought the first post was a joke.

Great response - a bit patronising, just amused tee hee, better than they deserve tbh!

This is one of the funniest threads I've read for ages.

The "yes, isn't it great" response on repeat is genius. Going to use that.

Personally, I would be mimicking them each time once they started and just going one step further. I mean massive piss taking. Really lean into it and have fun.

Exactly! I was going to suggest that you call them that and start quoting some lines to them!

@Steeleydan yes one thing we did have was the library.
We were called Junior Readers and had a blue card.
The kids’ section in my local library was as big as the adult section.
And I can remember going for meals occasionally and definitely getting clothed.
I can remember having a lot of stuff from a brand called Ladybird? And M&S stuff at Christmas, as well as C&A.

Yes, this. Next time you go on holiday, tell them you're walking there. All the way to wherever. And see what they come up with.

That library thing is utter shite! I was born in 1972, on Saturday mornings my dad took us to local library I'd be 5 or 6 ish so late 70s into early 80s.
I had every topsy and Tim book out of there, I loved getting my book stamped, the stamper thingy just fascinated me. I even had my own library card. So she's talking shite

Are these people for real?

They do not seem to understand what comfort. pleasure and enjoyment in life are about.

Sounds as though they would be happier living in Refugee Csmp.or War Zone..Where people genuinely suffer from shortages. terrible living conditions and limited resources on a daily basis.

Because they have no choice.

Eeh By Gum.

Best holiday we've ever had

Tell them you're proud to be a princess. How bizarre to expect you to walk with painful feet. They sound incredibly weird.

Don't older people get on your tits 😁

How old are they?

It's a combination of being annoying and not keeping up with the times, plus 'anything you can do we've already done it our way and it was much more fun'

We're in our early 60's but DD is only 20, I was an older mum. One day she's full of herself and we can't keep up but we ask questions to show her we're listening and showing interest - then she says we're thick cos we ask too many questions. Another day she's got the world on her shoulders and needs our advice - then she says 'how do you know so much'.

When DD was a baby, MIL used to tell me a story about 'our so&so' (my DH) everytime DD did something new - I got really pissed off with her & once said 'but this is our daughter not your son, he's 43 now', I got pissed off with her a lot. Now 20 years on, I'm MIL's age and I've noticed that I do the same thing, I refer back to a story when DD was whatever age. DD looks at me sometimes & says "you're doing it again mother". I think it's an 'reflex' or something like that, some people can't be happy for other people, they've always done better and you should do it their way.

My MIL caused me some right grief, she was mostly deaf so whatever you said to her she didn't hear it anyway.

Just wondering if you are my sister in-law! My MIL is like this, it's exhausting.

Sorry to disappoint but NO! Never used ChatGPT in my life. But if that is all you have to say after my long post maybe I will save my time and just use it in future.

These must be my parents. For my sins I went on holiday with them and DD and I'd forgotten how bad they were. It's almost always food with them.

You want to eat a piece of fruit? During the daytime? When the fruit has all been specifically allocated a window of time for consumption, and also, it must be these specific, very hard clementines leftover from Christmas (it was Easter), because they need using up. You want to buy grapes? GRAPES?! And not even the bargain basement, tasteless ones?! You realise they cost a whole £3.50!

You think we might go to a nice cafe or pub for lunch? We always manage with a picnic. No, we don't need to buy food as such, we can share the three slices of bread between the four of us, and a slice of ham each. No one needs butter on bread on a picnic! And here is some lukewarm water we can share, all 200ml of it. Yay!

My mum likes to feel morally superior on eco grounds, so talks at length about how she feels uncomfortable about her carbon footprint. She managed to guilt-trip me recently by saying sadly how the manure I buy for the garden comes contained in plastic bags, and she herself can't reconcile herself to the levels of plastic waste involved in such a horrendous enterprise as putting horseshit on one's courgettes. She made it sound as if I'd been using rocket fuel to power my round-the-world-cruise on the hunt endangered species to maim.

A friend of mine gave me the best counter for this sort of comment...
"What? You're flying to xyz?"
"I know, it's great isn't it?"
"But you could drive and see the countryside"
"I know, it's great isn't it?"

"What? That's your tent? It's massive"
"I know, it's great isn't it?"

"What? You sat on chairs?"
"I know, it's great isn't it?"

You don't need to justify anything, or extend your answer, just repeat that. Don't defend your stance, just let them know you think it's great. Don't get involved in any "you do you" that's defending your choice, you don't need to because it's your choice and "I know, it's great isn't it?"

Plus it works on those annoying dig questions like "Oh... You're still breastfeeding at 18months?"
"I know, it's great isn't it?"

@GreenPoppies as others have said, turn this into ‘One Down-manship Buzzword Bingo’. Make
some actual cards for you and DH. Shout ‘house’ when you win, I guarantee you will feel better hooting with laughter and they will think you lost the plot. Win-win!

Would you suggest to them that they could drive your two children to Portugal and you’ll fly and meet them there?

i’d love to see that one…

I really hope you have made this up - they are insane!

😂😂😂

Are they working class northerners by any chance? My dad used to revel in ‘you’ve never had it so good’ at times… the old ‘when I were a lad’ …. Followed by stories of bathing in tin baths in back yard, having half a boiled egg on a Sunday as a treat and bedrooms so cold there was frost on the inside of the windows.

it’s also the post war generation who had to ration and make do and mend.

I think they may be enjoying their own humour and winding you up.

They sound delightful full of themselves total twats. Time to take them to task or the suffering will never end.

Wow, you old people are so funny!! What on earth do you need a toothbrush for? You can just used a bit of bog roll or your teeshirt hem? And pants? Blimey one pair will last 4 days if you turn them round back to front and then repeat with them inside out, surely? If you’re leaving for a week, double-up and wear the second pair on top - and begin the process again on day 5 with the top pair? No need to ruin the planet with a carrier bag, after all.