Shocked by DP arranging for a woman to join us in the bedroom

So he’s sourced a prostitute, for you to have sex with? This is divorce material, it’s only going to get worse.

The fact that she's on one of these websites shoes she's not 'independent'. Who do you think owns these websites? Who makes money off of them. There's always a digital pimp.

And that point aside, would her profile really say 'I'm trafficked and coerced' if she was?

Like he's 'treating' you.

Wait, so you’re not married? There is no long term commitment here?

OMG! Get yourself out of this ‘situationship’ while you can!!!!

What on earth is there to consider? This is a man for whom no means maybe, and maybe means definitely yes.

No self-respecting woman would willingly go within one hundred miles of him.

Yeah, it's LTB time. He's obviously very much into this whole thing and likely won't let it go, so even if you haven't already contracted a serious case of 'the ick', I wouldn't be surprised if he continues to mention this fantasy. Meanwhile, in the back of your mind, you'll be unable to forget that this is what he secretly (well, not-so-secretly) wants and is imagining. You'll also wonder what he's already done and with whom. He's so desperate for it that he's grasping at straws to try to make it happen. He sounds deeply unattractive in every way that matters.

Right!

If you mentioned you'd like a weekend in Paris one day would he leap onto the internet to book it all within 24 hours and consult old colleagues for ideas on where to have dinner?

Is he as quick to sort out other things? Presents, nights out, washings?

Does he ever mention A T M?

From how you have described it OP , it sounds like he could have 'recruited' this woman via sites like adult work. It's like 'check a trade' ,but for sex workers 🙈. So there will be reviews from previous punters and a clear outline of what she has to offer. These things can be arranged easily / quickly.but I bet my bottom dollar he has either used SW before or has sought someone out until you show a slight bit of 'interest' in his fantasy. He sounds vile in my opinion and has no respect for you in the slightest.

He's jumped quite a lot of guns there, starting with interpreting "never say never" as "Yes, sort it out immediately."

Even if you had said yes, prostitution is not something I would want to be involved with. I like consent to be freely given.

I have been up for threesomes in certain circumstances, and I think it says a lot about men (not positively) that they think finding a third person who is up for it is enough. They seem to be surprised that that isn't enough for me. But just like I don't fancy every man, and I don't fancy every woman either, so any arrangements needs to involve all parties. I also like to know about recent STI tests and things like that, which most men don't seem to think important. I'm also a busy person, and I'm not dropping a night out with friends that took ages to arrange because of finding a time we're all free just because a man got busy online and didn't think to ask me if I'm available. They need to communicate and most of all, they need to check consent for all people in the given circumstances.

But, most of all, he should really have checked what you meant before doing anything, because he's just wasted everyone's time.

If you've said no many times, it is because he kept asking, grim.

Leave him, he is looking at prostitutes, next step is a threesome without your invite.

ewwww

esp 'personal "recommendation from an old colleage"

bleurgh!

This would give me terminal ick.

Christ, what a prick. That’s so grim that not only did he keep badgering you when you’d made clear it wasn’t your thing, but as soon as you made light of it when he mentioned it yet again he dived straight in. What a cunt.

I’d be tempted to string him along and cancel the woman and instead see if you can hire a man and explain it’s your fantasy to see him fucked up the arse. See how he likes that. But in reality, best to dump his sorry arse.

Fucking porn has a lot to answer for

He's awful but saying this was the green light to him laughing makes no difference.

Basically, he explained he had ‘found’ someone who’d be willing to join us. This is someone online with a few hundred reviews on a website and photos of her wearing next to nothing. He said it would be at his expense

How gallant of him to pay for the prostitute. A true prince.

Fucking hell.

Ohhhh the fact this is a topic of conversation at work would be the final straw for me.

🙏🙏🙏

Not for the threesome either, thats fine if all parties for it, for the involvement of a prostitute. Seems he wants to cuck you.

Guys gotta go ☢️

He's just her boyfriend, thank God.

So she comes recommended huh yeah he uses sex workers.

when procuring a sex worker for a threesome she’ll want contact with the other person so she knows they actually consent.

but besides that he didn’t make sure the next day if your never say never was an actual yes.

You’ve told him no numerous times Christ if you’re not into it he’d should been dumped the second time he mentioned it.

Can’t believe the men that have managed to get all the way to marriage on here sometimes

ltb..fast
guys a creep

Yep, one of those two for me as well.

I'm so fucking mad about how often us women have to bear the weight of their perversions and their insane sex drives. Why can't the government issue them all with their own Fleshlights so they can just leave us all alone. 😡

Oh Christ.

OP, you are not sexually compatible. This is a relationship ender and a deal-breaker. Find someone to be with who's as grossed out as you are by the idea of each of you sleeping with other people, in front of their very eyes. 🤢

When I wrote my first message to you, above, I skimmed some of the details and I thought you were married and in deep. Now I see that he's just a boyfriend and you don't even live together. THANK GOD!

You want totally different things in the sack, and his relentless badgering is showing you very clearly that what he wants is much more important to him than what you want. You are too different. For your own health and happiness, please break up with him. He's the one making it into a massive issue, anyway. Not your fault.

Sexual incompatibility is not surmountable, imo. This one is pretty bad, but even smaller ones can wear on you over the years. It's supposed to be fun, not a mediation table.

I would absolutely be ending this OP