To fundraise for a half marathon?

I agree with this.

Maybe op’s approach should have been that she’s doing a campaign to raise money further the charity, and is doing several projects - cake sales , sponsored runs etc. Not imply she had to raise £300+ money upfront to do the run.

YANBU, at all.
Doing a half marathon, 10k, race for life or any event for a charity is worthwhile. Some people may not donate because they don’t have the money too and that’s fine. I have recently done a marathon for a charity very close to my heart. I only fundraised for this, as in JustGiving and sponsor forms. I paid privately to do the marathon and then opened a page myself. I didn’t do any bake sales etc. I just regularly posted running updates and shared my page to fb and instagram. I never asked anyone directly to sponsor me (including close family) as I didn’t want to pressure anyone to donate. I ended up raising a lot of money, people were more than happy to donate, they were helping a good cause, I was doing something I thought I’d never do and remembering my mum in the process.
If anyone doesn’t want to donate or partake in fundraising activities that’s their prerogative just as it’s yours to do these activities…
I really don’t get the issue with a bake sale as the are also getting something back?!
Keep doing what you’re doing, any extra fundraising helps, and share the link on all of your social media fortnightly (depending how far away it is I would do this less often atm and more closer to the time) with updates as to how your training is going, posts when you get your bib, number, outfit etc.

GOOD LUCK I’m sure the day will be incredible and people there especially those you don’t know will get you through, and be proud of yourself! Xxx

I do feel for you OP, there really is no need for all that aggro. People are doing races for charities all the time, London Marathon just last week was named the biggest charity event in the world. Clearly it benefits charities otherwise they wouldnt do it. OP chose charity place to keep herself motivated and accountable. Half marathon is impressive distance and a big challenge, well done you! I don't think asking for donations is in bad taste if it's done thing in your workplace and you're not pushy. My company matches charity donations so ask about that too. Good luck with your training!

Wtf is their problem?! It's not a donation, if you're providing cakes, they are getting something.

It wouldn't matter to me how she put it. It's still her personal project and her choice of charity and I still agree with her coworker.

OP

I think part of the problem is how you wrote your original post.

You said “in order to take part I need to raise £375”

I think if you said I want to raise money for this charity so I have signed up to do a half….

maybe people would have read it that the charity was the reason for doing it not the other way round.

I have, as have all my AC. And I used to run a 10k road circuit a couple of Sundays a month just around the neighbouring villages when the lanes were quiet, 5-7k three evenings a week, swam a mile at the ladies-only session every Tuesday, cycled to work and exercised my friend’s horse on Wednesdays after our own retired. I was on my feet at work and averaged 17k to 28k steps a day.

Now I’m retired and osteoarthritis has put a stop to me running while I’m on the list for a hip replacement, but please don’t assume I’ve no idea what a half marathon and it’s preparation entail.

I didn’t seek sponsorship, but I sponsored my daughters.

If you don't want to donate to anyone else's chosen charity you don't have to. But equally, you don't have to go into minute detail about how awful you think fundraising is. It doesn't do anything other than demoralise the runner and add more negativity into the world.

This is AIBU. She came here to ask if she was being unreasonable, given that a colleague had (actually quite bravely) said that she didn't think it was appropriate given how hard up people are feeling at the moment. Most people in a workplace or social setting don't feel so able to assert their true feelings about these things, for fear of being labelled tight, mean and an uncharitable old grouch.

An anonymous forum is the one place people can let off steam about how they really feel without fear of judgement or being made to feel guilty for not allowing themselves to be emotionally manipulated.

I don't believe most people are uncharitable. What they are is just a bit fed up of people dressing up challenges undertaken for their own sense of achievement and personal ambition as acts of altruism. On the whole, we are all capable of recognising when someone is doing this and when they are not.

When you bear in mind that this kind of thing might be asked of you several times a year in many workplaces or social settings, there is huge social pressure to say yes. Whether it's 'sponsor my 9 year old £5 to swim five lengths of the school pool to raise money to buy the teachers a new fridge for the staff room' or 'Sponsor me to run a marathon because I've lost four stone on Ozempic and have coincidentally had a miraculous epiphany about the benefits of getting off my fat arse' it can get relentless.

It's like the old philosophical debate about altruism from Friends. It only counts if the person doing The Thing gets no benefit at all. If they so much as get a small glow/run 13.1 miles/feel proud they have been able to raise money for a charity that is researching a disease that affects so many people, then it has actually only been a benefit to themselves and it was a selfish act.

I feel sorry for @tilyougetenough I think you have done nothing wrong and you are getting a very hard time from some people who just want to stick the boot in.

Doing a run for charity is not tone deaf or selfish. I mean, there are literally thousands of charity places for thousands of runs and races across the world. Telling people you are doing it as a means of raising money is also not a bad thing to do. Baking cakes (with the time and ingredients being paid out your own pocket) and asking people to make a donation in return is not a bad thing to do. Sharing a Just Giving link is not a bad thing to do.

Nobody is being forced to donate to charity, or even a specific charity.

How mean spirited must folk be if they are calculating out how much money someone must pay before they can mention a charity? Should the OP fund the £375 herself and the ask if anyone else would like to donate? But if she has put in £375 then why not round it up to £500. Make her parents top it up to a cool £1k!

If you don't want to donate to anyone else's chosen charity you don't have to. But equally, you don't have to go into minute detail about how awful you think fundraising is. It doesn't do anything other than demoralise the runner and add more negativity into the world.

Yes, exactly. The OP didn't even say she intended to pay the other 40 quid herself, which was the difference between the cost of the two places. 😂That would have reduced the cost for everyone else straight away.

To frame it in a more realistic way, either i have to pay £60 or otherwise I have to pay £20 and other people have to pay £375.

I have mixed feelings about this, as I often feel it’s more about the run/experience than the charity for a lot of my friends/colleagues. That being said, I’ve still given towards a few London Marathon fundraisers recently where the chosen charity was deeply personal to the runner or I connected with the cause. In each case I’ve been happy to support them - particularly after them making it through such a long training plan.

When I had to fundraise about £250 for an event I really wanted to do for personal reasons (Macmillan Might Hike), I found it really distasteful asking people to support my “experience” so I donated the minimum amount I had to fundraise personally.

I don’t give that much to charity regularly and it worked out about £20/month over a year - which I am fortunate to be able to spare.

I told everyone I’d donated to meet minimum fundraising target and shared the link in case they wished to contribute too. People were generous and the total was £575 in the end.

If your fundraising target is £2500 then I get it’s not feasible to donate all of that yourself but I think it’s important to put your hand in your pocket and show willing before expecting other people to do the same.

I've just looked at the entry criteria and it's £60 to enter with no expectation to fund raise or £20 to enter but you need to raise £375. So it's cheaper for you to go the fund raising route as well, assuming you actually manage to hit the target. It's interesting that you said 'In order to take part I need to raise £375 for a charity.'

If fund raising for CRUK which is something you are apparently so 'passionate' about was you main and sole aim, the whole wording structure of your OP would have been completely different. It would have been less about 'in order to take part I need to...' and more about 'I wanted to raise money for my favourite charity CRUK, so I entered the Bath Half on behalf of CRUK and started training for it.'

It's very clear to everyone reading this that you wanted to enter the race firstly for yourself and the option to raise funds was a secondary factor. It's not difficult to arrive at the conclusion that you chose a charity place because:

a) it gives you the added momentum and incentive to keep up the training because other people have sponsored you and are watching your progress, which is totally understandable.
b) maybe because the non-charity places had already gone.
c) maybe because the charity place worked out significantly cheaper for you, assuming you raise the money.

That's not what I am saying and I think you know it.

If you want to know whether YABU or not, try this simple multiple choice quiz:

Question 1:

I took up running because:

a) I've spent the last two years losing loads of weight and now I want to improve my health and fitness

b) I wanted to raise some money for a cancer charity and running seemed like the best idea. My fitness 'journey' was not a factor at all. The running a marathon for charity idea came first, the running training started purely as a result of that.

Question 2:

When I first looked into how to enter this particular marathon, I had no idea whether I'd be running it for charity or not, and no idea which specific charity I would be running it for. I decided I wanted to set myself this fitness goal and looked into the entry options later.

a) true

b) false

Question 3:

I opted for a charity place because:

a) I really wanted to raise money for cancer even though I could have done that in several ways at any time in the past (for example being a coordinator for the McMillan coffee morning thing at my workplace) and haven't.

b) it's easier to get a guaranteed place on the race if you choose the charity route.

c) I have over 1000 followers on social media and I wanted to make the optics of my weight loss and fitness 'journey' appear more selfless and altruistic.

Also OP have you considered other ways to raise the funds? I raised £500 through sending my just giving link to friends and family. I only sent it round once with a message that said no pressure at all and that I also value any running tips. The rest I am raising through buying and selling things!

'Bog standard' doesn't necessarily denote a negative; just often something that is ubiquitous and very familiar to everybody.

CRUK had income last year not too far short of three quarters of a billion pounds - and they spent £130m just in raising more; so I'd say they're probably not desperate for additional funds. Personally, I prefer to give to smaller charities where I know my money will make a difference - and will actually be at least momentarily noticed - rather than to a behemoth where it will be 0.00001% of a hidden rounding sum on a balance spreadsheet. Many others feel the same in this.

OP there’s a lot of seasoned runners on this thread. We are coming to the end of spring marathon season and we have been bombarded with sponsorship requests from our runner friends. as explained above, lots of people take up charity places as a way to get an entry into a ballot only race, and expect friends and family to contribute to pay the amount required by the charity. I have a friend who has just done their third London, for a different charity each time. It isn’t a great sacrifice for them as they would have done it without the charity place if they’d been successful in the ballot.

Nobody is doubting the effort required to run a half, especially starting from scratch but some of us are a little fatigued with the charity request and are trying to warn you that other people around you might feel the same way.

You are missing the point here.
This isn't people being offended by YOU or your arse being worked off. It's just something which totally lost the novelty, you are gazillion-second person doing it, and there is nothing interesting or special about that.
Now your are still going about you, you, you, and people are annoyed about the entitlement dripping from that.

You've opened the thread with a colleague who hinted it's not welcomed - and still you are sure everyone is happy!

Good luck with your training, OP.

Gosh, I started a AIBU thread this week as I was worried people would judge me for NOT raising money for charity for the London marathon (I had a ballot place). I did donate happily to lots of other people’s fund raising.

Nothing wrong with what OP is doing and as I found, when people hear you are taking on a big challenge, they often want to support you and are rather surprised if you aren’t raising money!

As long as you are not too pushy about it (and I wouldn’t call a bake sale pushy) most people will think it fine.

Your attitude is bizarre.

You paid 20£ out of 60£ standard fee.
You are heavily passionate about what turned to be a huge bog standard charity.
One of your colleagues has mentioned in passing that it’s not in good taste to do something like this at the moment as times are tough, and it leads you to believe that everyone is more than happy to donate. (Wtf?)

It is ok to ask once around you, in a way when you don't really know who donated and who didn't. Anything else is annoying.

If you live in a well-off bubble, you can do the baking or something else , and people can donate just for the fun of the interactions around it.

If you are in a running bubble, people are tired of the incessant requests.

How hard is half marathon for you is irrelevant, you've decided you want to spend time getting ready, good for you.

Yes, I see a big difference when children are fundraising, they are getting some skills from that. It's a bit lame comparing your hobby with kids.
I don't really care about the guy with a fridge, though I respect the extraordinary effort that got them to the front pages.