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Original poster

Funeral flowers - help!

35 replies

Florence4170 · 28/04/2026 20:00

I know it’s not an AIBU but please help anyway.
I am going to a funeral next week, travelling the day before. Just found out that the family would like flowers. When I was bereaved I had some wonderful flowers, but so many that it was overwhelming. Everywhere I looked it was bouquets, arrangements, the door was constantly going, if I went out I’d find a floral delivery on the doorstep - so for that reason I m not keen. Beside the point really, because they want flowers. In my head I have a vision of a completely spherical posy with a ribbon handle, a bit like a flower girl might carry at a wedding. I can’t see anything like it, only domed posies, which is not right. Am I being ridiculous to want something like this? I can’t believe it’s that unusual…and if you have recently bought funeral flowers how much did you pay? I’d really like to get them from a local florist but the funeral is the day after the bank holiday so I think I would have to collect them several days before they were needed, so I don’t think that would work.
Any advice gratefully received please!

OP posts:
Purpletable · 28/04/2026 21:01

Florence4170 · 28/04/2026 20:47

@7238SM yes I plan to walk behind the coffin carrying a basket of petals and scattering them. 😀. I didn’t think the sphere idea was weird, it obviously is. Thank you for your comments, I assumed the flowers would just be displayed around the coffin. I don’t think I’ve been to a funeral which wasn’t either no flowers or family only. I know lots of people have issues with lilies, I’m sorry they are a bad memory for you.

Are you certain scattering petals would be okay with the family OP? I’m sorry, I don’t know how close you are to the person who died, but usually it’s immediate family who walk just behind the coffin.
I’m sorry for your loss.

WilfredsPies · 28/04/2026 21:00

I didn’t think the sphere idea was weird, it obviously is

I don’t think it’s weird, but massively impractical. How would it be displayed? Either on a grave or at the home? The flowers on the bottom would be squashed or get pollen over their furniture.

hahabahbag · 28/04/2026 20:59

Some people do bring a bouquet with them, hand tied from their own gardens even, there’s no right or wrong. You can order from a florist in advance, buy a preformed oasis and put your own flowers in in the morning or simply buy a bouquet from a florist or supermarket on the day

Purpletable · 28/04/2026 20:54

Justmuddlingalong · 28/04/2026 20:21

Order them from a florist local to the funeral. They deliver them to the funeral parlour the morning of the service and the undertaker puts them in the hearse with the coffin.
I've never seen anyone turn up with the flowers with them.
Usually pay about £50.

This.
I usually ring the undertakers to find out which florist they use and then contact them.
The florist will then deliver to the funeral home and put the flowers with the others. You’ll be asked what to put on the small accompanying card.

Original poster
Florence4170 · 28/04/2026 20:48

@Justmuddlingalong@MrsCarmelaSopranothank you

OP posts:
Original poster
Florence4170 · 28/04/2026 20:47

@7238SM yes I plan to walk behind the coffin carrying a basket of petals and scattering them. 😀. I didn’t think the sphere idea was weird, it obviously is. Thank you for your comments, I assumed the flowers would just be displayed around the coffin. I don’t think I’ve been to a funeral which wasn’t either no flowers or family only. I know lots of people have issues with lilies, I’m sorry they are a bad memory for you.

OP posts:
MrsCarmelaSoprano · 28/04/2026 20:47

Justmuddlingalong · 28/04/2026 20:21

Order them from a florist local to the funeral. They deliver them to the funeral parlour the morning of the service and the undertaker puts them in the hearse with the coffin.
I've never seen anyone turn up with the flowers with them.
Usually pay about £50.

Yes, this,the florist delivers.

toomuchfaff · 28/04/2026 20:41

Justmuddlingalong · 28/04/2026 20:21

Order them from a florist local to the funeral. They deliver them to the funeral parlour the morning of the service and the undertaker puts them in the hearse with the coffin.
I've never seen anyone turn up with the flowers with them.
Usually pay about £50.

This.

Local florist will probably do any type of flowers to suit any budget.

7238SM · 28/04/2026 20:32

In my head I have a vision of a completely spherical posy with a ribbon handle, a bit like a flower girl might carry at a wedding

WHY? For you to carry like a bridesmaid to the funeral or do you mean to have delivered to their home? Either way it sounds very odd. IF I want flowers for a funeral:

-I ring a local florist in the town the person lives and unless I want a specific colour, I chose 'florist choice'.
-I don't use interflora or other large courier services
-I never buy anything which doesn't have a vase or water receptable included- why give the bereaved more issues by having to find yet another vase?
-For a funeral, I'd chose a living plant and never pick lilies

I say this from experience, starting when I was 15 when my dad suddenly died. I can't stand the stench of lilies since that day, the stamens stain everything and I vividly recall my mum scrabbling around trying to use coffee jars and pint glasses for yet more flowers.

Justmuddlingalong · 28/04/2026 20:21

Order them from a florist local to the funeral. They deliver them to the funeral parlour the morning of the service and the undertaker puts them in the hearse with the coffin.
I've never seen anyone turn up with the flowers with them.
Usually pay about £50.