AIBU to let my DS opt out of sport

He's only 7, he can't have tried many sports yet so can't say he dislikes them all. I would keep trying different sports. If the competitive aspect is the issue are there any clubs that do sports just for fun rather than competing? Its at least a thing where I am. Also some clubs that do compete allow children to just join for training and skip matches.
But if he's dead set against team sports then try non team ones. But having at least one active extra curricular is very beneficial to their fitness and health. I've always insisted on at least one for both my children (girl and boy) DD tried a few different things then found her sport when she was 11, DS does all the sports he can - he's not very good at any of them so it's not like he's one of those kids who's just good at sports so enjoys them because of that.

As long as he's active, it doesn't matter how he does it. Sport often implies competitiveness, and that doesn't suit everyone - particularly girls who tend to prefer more aesthetic actives (e.g., gymnastics, dance)

Our 15 yr old son was never interested in sport and while we introduced him to several sports when he was younger we eventually gave up

When he went to high school he himself discovered what he was missing out on and has played a team sport ever since. His lack of early years experience clearly shows but he really enjoys playing but he does regret that he started late

I would ask them why what are they missing out on? no it is not needed I presume children managed to cope before organised sport was a parenting accessory years ago

same reason a girl can reach adulthood succesfully without the cliched dancing or the world will end thing

The cultural sexism that pushes sports is very gendered, but realistically this probably works against girls’ best interests. Women tend to suffer from a lack of fitness, competitiveness and negative mental health response to criticism to a greater extent than men.

Always recommend the same thing - take him along to junior parkrun on a Sunday morning. 9am, 2k version and kids can run, jog, walk, skip or even volunteer. They can do it alone, or you do it with them.

great for fitness, self confidence and regular routine without the commitment of team or organised activities.

He’ll get exposure at school. If he likes stuff you can build on that. Being active is fairly essential for making the most of life and organized sport is a great way to hone competitive instincts, learn teamwork and develop robustness and grit. But there are plenty of other ways too. Doing things he loves and developing internal motivation is much better for him if he already has interests.

The CMO guidance is that children should do at least 60 mins of moderate to vigorous activity per day

Does he meet this? If not, he doesn’t need to do team sports but needs to do some VIGOROUS activity for at least an hour not just ‘active’. The problem with self-directed activities for kids is that they often fall short of the vigorous level required for good health. Once it gets a bit hard, they naturally ramp it back.

For example, a child getting in a pool and having a swim is rarely going to push themselves to the required amount of effort. However a child in organised pre-squad/squad should come out of the hour sufficiently puffed (took mine a few mins to be able to talk normally etc), which is the level of activity you are needing.

ETA - I had a few that didn’t like team sports, so instead they got to choose from things like swimming, martial arts, squash with an instructor (no games). As long as they walked away having worked up a good sweat I was happy. Others were quite happy to do team sports and a mixture of other stuff, and one had a team sport that involved training/playing 6 times a week.

This.

My son never did team sports. He does athletics, sailing and used to be part of a swim club and also kung fu. Team sports just never suited him so why on earth would I have forced him.

Your son is active. He’s fine.

If he doesn't like team sports don't make him. You said he swims which is a sport. What about a martial art or athletics or gymnastics if he isn't into chasing a ball about. I always loathed team sports but loved swimming, trampolining and other non team things. Sadly schools are obsessed with muddy ball sports.

When you say they don’t do sport, do you mean extra curricular? Or do they refuse to do PE in school?

I would absolutely be encouraging him into trying some more sports and seeing if you can find something that suits him. It doesn't need to be football, rugby or cricket but there are a lot of other options. I think doing at least one sport and ensuring they meet the recommended exercise requirements is really important. It's much easier with some kids than others but it's very much worth encouraging. My rule is that you can choose what you do but you have to do something.

Some of the attitudes from ‘sporty’ people on here are shocking. There’s no skill you can get exclusively from competitive sports that you can’t get elsewhere. What utter bollocks!
I have no coordination and was shit at sports, I dreaded PE lessons. My DDs were the same. I never forced them into sport and this has had absolutely no impact on them whatsoever. They both have good jobs where teamwork is essential and have naturally found their own non competitive ways to keep fit and active.

So, he does school PE, swimming and bike riding? That'd fine.

Pulling him out of school PE isn't a great plan, but choosing not to opt into more especially if you can keep him active otherwise, is fine.

He nay find his sport thing later, he may not.

There is absolutely no benifit in being forced into a "team" sport where the rest of the team exclude you as you are deemed low ability.

People who like team sports absolutely cannot understand that not everyone is the same. They are like the worst kind of dog people (he is friendly let him jump up and dribble all over you).

There are so many sports out there that don't require you to be the weak link and have everyone shouting at you. Absolutely give him a chance to try various things, I think it is important to be active, but it does not have to be competitive.

Nobody needs competitive sport. Great for those that want it but most of us don’t. It was a revelation to me after I left school and discovered that swimming, walking, cycling and yoga were enjoyable just for the sheer pleasure of doing them.

Tell me you're good at sport without telling me you're good at sport....

Almost all team sport opportunities, even at that ages, are highly competitive. I know, I have tried to find an option for my nion-sporty son at that age.

And from personal experience, being the shittest person on the team does nothing but give you low self esteem.

7 years old is very young to decide someone is ‘not sporty’. My rule was they had to do swimming lessons until competent and also participate in something active throughout primary school.

Oh goody, another way I'm falling short as a parent! 🥳

(Just kidding. If your kids are active and happy, OP, crack on.)

Being active is important, but this being specifically from a team sport I think less so. My son (8) has landed on a martial art, swimming, performing arts (which includes dance) and cubs. The martial art and the cubs sessions often start with a few team like ball games when they are warming everyone up- I think it's enough. I was a little sad when he wanted to stop football, but I think he has learnt enough to join a kick around in the park without embarrassing himself too much and that's all I really wanted for him there. I know he plays basketball with his friends at break sometimes at school.

He should be doing at least 1, preferably more team sports.

This is legally required, is it?

Sport is boring, he’s just realised early. Sounds like a clever lad.

He should be doing at least 1, preferably more team sports. There are so many choices. Just take him along and see how it goes. At 7, he has no idea if he will like them until he tries. You are the boss. This sounds like gentle parenting bullshit.

I do think there is value in learning to be physically active. That can take many different forms. There is no one path to physical fitness and team sports are not superior.

As long as he does something physical, like swimming and riding his bicycle, it doesn’t matter if it is an organized activity.