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AIBU?

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Original poster

To go without her?

132 replies

ThreeGirl · 27/04/2026 08:37

I booked a theatre trip next weekend with SD11. SD14 (who we rarely see and has never expressed an interest in theatre) is now upset she’s not going. DH has suggested I reschedule so she can come. AIBU not to?

OP posts:
Original poster
ThreeGirl · 27/04/2026 08:49

BudgetBuster · 27/04/2026 08:48

Did you specifically ask her if she wanted to go to the show? If yes and she didn't reply, YANBU. If you didn't, then yes YABU.

More context needed.

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No I didn’t. I don’t have much of a relationship with her (her choice).

Why would I invite someone who barely speaks to me on a weekend away?

OP posts:
BudgetBuster · 27/04/2026 08:48

ThreeGirl · 27/04/2026 08:44

I message her and she doesn’t reply or just sends an emoji. I haven’t seen her in person for about six weeks (she sometimes comes over on the night of the week that I’m out).

SD is here 3-4 nights a week.

Show quote history

Did you specifically ask her if she wanted to go to the show? If yes and she didn't reply, YANBU. If you didn't, then yes YABU.

More context needed.

Original poster
ThreeGirl · 27/04/2026 08:48

Goditsmemargaret · 27/04/2026 08:43

Well you've given very little context but I know how this could happen in our setup here. SD would undoubtedly be playing an attention seeking game getting everyone to run around after her and then not show up on the day.

Is it something like that? Because otherwise it's unclear as to why you wouldn't just include her now.

If I’d have invited her, I doubt she’d have replied; but now it’s a “thing” I think she would come. But she’d be giving me the cold shoulder all day and it’d be an awkward experience.

I told SD12 she could have a reward for passing an exam, she’s tried really hard, and theatre is something we both enjoy.

OP posts:
Swiftie1878 · 27/04/2026 08:47

ThreeGirl · 27/04/2026 08:44

I message her and she doesn’t reply or just sends an emoji. I haven’t seen her in person for about six weeks (she sometimes comes over on the night of the week that I’m out).

SD is here 3-4 nights a week.

Show quote history

Did you ask her if she wanted to go before you booked tickets?
If you didn’t, YABU.
If you did and got no reply, then YANBU, and should just tell her you’ll do another theatre trip soon when she can come along.

Original poster
ThreeGirl · 27/04/2026 08:44

BudgetBuster · 27/04/2026 08:40

Did you not even bother asking her? That's a bit rude IMO

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I message her and she doesn’t reply or just sends an emoji. I haven’t seen her in person for about six weeks (she sometimes comes over on the night of the week that I’m out).

SD is here 3-4 nights a week.

OP posts:
Goditsmemargaret · 27/04/2026 08:43

Well you've given very little context but I know how this could happen in our setup here. SD would undoubtedly be playing an attention seeking game getting everyone to run around after her and then not show up on the day.

Is it something like that? Because otherwise it's unclear as to why you wouldn't just include her now.

BudgetBuster · 27/04/2026 08:40

ThreeGirl · 27/04/2026 08:37

I booked a theatre trip next weekend with SD11. SD14 (who we rarely see and has never expressed an interest in theatre) is now upset she’s not going. DH has suggested I reschedule so she can come. AIBU not to?

Did you not even bother asking her? That's a bit rude IMO

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