AIBU to feel awkward about only my husband being invited to the wedding?

She can jog on.

It's your husband being willing to attend without you that's really the issue. You both work with this woman. Both socialise with her. But only he gets an invitation? Where's the solidarity with his wife, who's being disrespected?

It is odd if she works and socialised with you both equally. If (say for financial reasons) she could only invite one of you then if anything the 'girl-code' should've meant it was you that she chose!

This, 100%. And like at least one PP has said, I'd be.cooling the out of work friendship right off too.

This! Very rude, and also how can your husband not see that?! I would be annoyed at him for going if it was me

Inviting work colleagues without a plus 1 isn’t unusual, especially if they were going as a group. Inviting 1 colleague and not their partner that is also a colleague is odd. If it was us, I wouldn’t tell DH he couldn’t go but he probably wouldn’t go.

Bizarre situation!!
I can’t believe your H is going either!!
I’d be really annoyed about both issues tbh grrr

We don’t know Jane
But would be weird for her to suddenly decide this unless she had a compelling reason.

Glad his mum also thought it rude. I’d go without dh and he’d go without me for work colleagues or school friends if he didn’t know them but in this case, you socialise and work together. She’s sending a message. An unpleasant one. Neither dh or I would attend in this situation.

This is weird, the 3 of you work together in the same team and also socialise together, but only your H is invited? This is a deliberate snub. My H would not go.

It's odd your H is defending this robustly; something smells off, OP.

It’s weird and rude because you have a relatively equal relationship with her to your husband and yet she’s cherry picked him. I get if she invited the boss, you, dh and other colleague and left two out it would look bad but surely easy to invite no one.

id be miffed if my husband choose to go.

And yes I agree with others your husband should decline the invite and have your back on this.

Wow that’s really odd what did Jane say when your husband questioned it?

How awful. Your husband is being exceptionally dim. I don't know what to suggest OP but this is not normal or okay.

I think this is weird. I wouldn’t feel awkward, but I would be weirded out if my DH went without me. She’s got balls I give her that. If he’s going and you’re ok with it then just make a joke about instead of showing it bothers you, but I would give her a wide berth. She just sounds odd. Of course in MN world of black and white, she can invite whoever she wants to her wedding, but there are also social graces and manners. It’s just bad manners to invite one half of a couple you know, spend time with and work with equally.

I'm really relaxed about spouses socialising without each other and having male female friends but this is next level. Its rude. She's telling you she dislikes you. Also really disrespectful that your dh is going. I'd be cutting her off. Go for the slow fade after the wedding. He'd better support you and drop her.

Are you sure they aren't shagging?

I think your husband is weird for not getting how strange this is.

I thought that.
Seems a deliberate snub.

If anything husband is the one more likely to be loud.

Is he the entertainment?

There's lots of threads like this and the answer is the same. It costs huge amounts not per person, it's not the same as the old days. For my wedding each guest was over £200 just for their food and drink (it wasn't a big bougie wedding or anything like that). Every 5 guests is a grand so you can't justify inviting partners you don't know for the sake of it. In this day and age as long as the person has other friends at the wedding they should be able to cope without their partner for one day.

BUT in your case it's very odd as you all work together. Unless it turns out you don't really know her then it feels quite harsh/rude.

Sometimes I read on here about "no plus ones" and I'm a bit on the fence. I know weddings are expensive but they were never cheap. In this situation I think the bride is unbelievably rude and I know my DH would politely decline. I'm a bit surprised your husband isn't slightly offended on your behalf.

I may be childish (I don't care), but I'd leave him to buy a present, I wouldn't sign the card, and I certainly wouldn't drive him there and back so he can drink.

My husband simply would not dream of going in this scenario. It’s incredibly weird that your husband thinks this is ok.

Ask the bride for the reason. My husband would not go without me and vice versa.

Agree. I wouldn’t be socialising with Jane after this. She clearly prefers your husband to you. I would cool right off.

I think she is very rude, I also think your husband is out I'd order if he goes without you as its condoning her rudeness

I would never invite someone and not their other half! We even gave my single friend a plus one in case she wanted to bring another friend or her daughter so she didn’t have to attend on her own!

Is your husband going to go?

I think if it’s work colleagues and you don’t know the spouse partner, fair enough to just invite the person you know.

Seems old-fashioned to me to think you have to invite spouses - from the days when wives didn’t work outside the home and tagged along with their husband’s work social life. Might be different if it’s evening only, perhaps more normal to invite partners too.

But odd as you do know and work with her