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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to feel awkward about only my husband being invited to the wedding?

291 replies

Thewitchofwestminster · 26/04/2026 17:05

I don't know to feel about it.

Both myself and my husband work in an office with 'Jane'. I have always thought we got on well together and we have become friends outside of the workplace, socialising together.

Jane is getting married in a few weeks and has invited my husband to her wedding but not myself. Husband was given an invitation with his name only on and when he queried he was told it was only for him.

If she had come to me and said it was because of costs or if she invited me she would have had to plus one others I would have understood but it is all just a bit weird!

My husband is attending and that is fair enough but it has left me feeling so awkward.

Would you invite just one spouse to a wedding?

OP posts:
JoshLymanSwagger · 26/04/2026 17:33

Leave him to it.

Don't get involved.

Do you have kids, if so, tell him to sort out a sleepover as you're out with your friends (ben and jerry) that night.

BananaPeels · 26/04/2026 17:33

This would be my worst nightmare- a wedding where I know pretty no one and my partner isn’t there to chat to. Why on earth is your DH going?

Alwaysthesameoldstory · 26/04/2026 17:31

Backawayfromthesausage · 26/04/2026 17:30

Really. I honestly don’t get the entitlement to go everywhere with your spouse. It’s a small team, who knows how many others Past the op and hee husband. I’m quite capable of going to a wedding without my husband and vice Versa and I would certainly not consider it rude if I wasn’t invited to a colleagues wedding.

people are so weird on here.

Show quote history

It's not about entitlement.
It's about etiquette and manners.

Backawayfromthesausage · 26/04/2026 17:31

I’m guessing some folks in here either just love a good wedding or don’t get out much?

Backawayfromthesausage · 26/04/2026 17:30

sesquipedalian · 26/04/2026 17:28

I think this “Jane” is astoundingly rude. And I really don’t think your DH should go to this wedding. As for “we have become friends outside of the workplace, socialising together”, clearly not any more.

Wow, you’d end a friendship if you don’t get an invite to a wedding. Bloody hell/

ParmaVioletTea · 26/04/2026 17:30

Pretty rude. If you’re married, it’s usual to invite both spouses to a wedding. I think you need to distance yourself from- and really, your DH should decline the invitation. Your colleague is very rude.

Backawayfromthesausage · 26/04/2026 17:30

Alwaysthesameoldstory · 26/04/2026 17:27

Really?
I'm not a wedding person but I recognise rudeness when it's so blatant.
And disloyalty.

Show quote history

Really. I honestly don’t get the entitlement to go everywhere with your spouse. It’s a small team, who knows how many others Past the op and hee husband. I’m quite capable of going to a wedding without my husband and vice Versa and I would certainly not consider it rude if I wasn’t invited to a colleagues wedding.

people are so weird on here.

Cosyblankets · 26/04/2026 17:29

Thewitchofwestminster · 26/04/2026 17:22

We are all the same small team.
My husband is the only one from our team invited apart from his boss and the bosses wife but only myself and my husband socialise outside of work with Jane.
No history as far as I know.
The venue is large.

In a normal work situation it would be fine.
But in this situation it's just weird

sesquipedalian · 26/04/2026 17:28

I think this “Jane” is astoundingly rude. And I really don’t think your DH should go to this wedding. As for “we have become friends outside of the workplace, socialising together”, clearly not any more.

DontReplyAll · 26/04/2026 17:28

In those circumstances I think my DH would have declined and we’d have sent a gift from both of us

Alwaysthesameoldstory · 26/04/2026 17:27

Backawayfromthesausage · 26/04/2026 17:25

I’d assume number restrictions, I’d really not be fussed about this

Really?
I'm not a wedding person but I recognise rudeness when it's so blatant.
And disloyalty.

Backawayfromthesausage · 26/04/2026 17:27

Ponderingwindow · 26/04/2026 17:26

I don’t understand why your husband is going to the wedding. His presence is not required. This is absolutely a send a card with a token gift situation.

Well maybe he wants to go? I would. Confused

Backawayfromthesausage · 26/04/2026 17:26

How many are in the small team Inc you Jane and your husband?

Ponderingwindow · 26/04/2026 17:26

I don’t understand why your husband is going to the wedding. His presence is not required. This is absolutely a send a card with a token gift situation.

Goditsmemargaret · 26/04/2026 17:25

You, DH and Jane are all on the same team? You yourself socialise with Jane? This is weird AF.

Backawayfromthesausage · 26/04/2026 17:25

I’d assume number restrictions, I’d really not be fussed about this

cupfinalchaos · 26/04/2026 17:25

As far as I’m concerned if someone’s married you invite them as a couple or you just don’t, end of. I’m shocked your dh is considering going- how rude.

JanBlues2026 · 26/04/2026 17:25

Is DH friends with the groom, as it may be he is included with the numbers for the groom’s friends and family whereas she may have reached her limit of friends.

Alwaysthesameoldstory · 26/04/2026 17:25

Has your H said why he thinks it's appropriate to go to this wedding OP?
Does he not recognise what an unpleasant snub this is to you?

NoSoupForU · 26/04/2026 17:25

It isn't something I'd do. But I've known of people invite colleagues as a group. Is he maybe amongst a group of workmates who are close or socialise together?

ilovepixie · 26/04/2026 17:23

It’s a bit weird and rude. And I can’t believe your DH is going!

DalmationalAnthem · 26/04/2026 17:23

One spouse to a wedding-absolutely, if s/he's invited as part of a friendship/hobby/work group.

The fact you work with her too is really weird and awkward, even more so the fact that your husband is attending!

Did he say why he's attending?

Original poster
Thewitchofwestminster · 26/04/2026 17:22

We are all the same small team.
My husband is the only one from our team invited apart from his boss and the bosses wife but only myself and my husband socialise outside of work with Jane.
No history as far as I know.
The venue is large.

OP posts:
Trampoline · 26/04/2026 17:22

Teeheehee1579 · 26/04/2026 17:10

Are they in the same team and you are not? I don’t subscribe to the having to invite a spouse to a wedding just because married or in a long term relationship - things are far too expensive and space often limited but this does seem odd unless she’s invited the team and you’re in another team in which case I find it fair enough. Also when he asked if it was just for him did she not say yes it is because…..??

This is my question too - is she perhaps inviting her whole team without partners, of which your DH is part of but you are not?
If not, agree that this is odd and baffling.

AuntChippy · 26/04/2026 17:20

How rude and ignorant of her.

How disloyal and downright weird of your husband to accept.