Babysitting and the parents have just called me drunk…

Yeah and cos its rich people its ok?! 🙄

So irresponsible. What if an emergency occurred? Both parents pissed up.

Plus hungover tomorrow. Poor kids.

Really can't fathom the obsession with drink in this country. If you have no kids do as you please....but there are so many children and young people messed up because of their parents attitudes towards drink. The parent dont even realise the damage they are doing.

Ffs have some alcohol free ones they taste the bloody same....you can have a great time and not get drunk 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

Does that make it right? Is it better that they're drunk and middle class than drunk and poor?

I'm imagining her about 25 - but I interpreted that she's an older cousin to the children rather than an older cousin to the parents. I think by 50 most women have managed to learn not to take this level of shit but a lot of young women in their 20s haven't learned how yet.

Well knock that on the head
You're being taken advantage of

Going forward I’d charge them and insist that they put you up for the night.
I used to babysit and the parents liked to go on late night benders so she asked me to sleep over in the spare room and she paid well, I was 18 at the time. She’d pay me till about 10am so I got up with the kids so they could have a lie in.

So what time did they actually get home?
They said 1030-11 and you assumed this meant 3am after they called you.
Seems a bit dramatic!

Well you need to stop that, don't you. Who made that 'expectation'? Not you I bet. Stop being a doormat. Cheeky Fuckers and chancers get away with it when people allow them to. Refuse to babysit again unless you are paid, and demand it upfront. You are actively encouraging their bad behaviour, AND setting a bad example for the kids.

Why are you assuming the OP is young? She has said she’s an older cousin. I imagined her about 50.

Let's hope they babysit for you when the time comes. Presumably they can baby sit for each other on a reciprocal basis. That's not the case for you. DD babysat for neighbours ten years ago. It was £10ph before midnight; £20ph after midnight. She was 17.

Glad you got home okay. I’m annoyed for you that you weren’t paid though. Why did you agree to that?

I'm really glad that you got home eventually now but this was the point when you needed to be assertive.

It would not have been rude or unreasonable to say "When I said everything is fine I meant that the children are asleep and there are no problems. But I am tired and I need to go to bed and we agreed 11pm so please can you come home". You have every right and authority to say that and I hope you are able to develop the self-esteem that you caninsist on being treated reasonably in future.

It would also have been reasonable to put yourself to bed in their bedafter their monumentally selfish decision to stay out so much later than agreed. Make the "how to sleep on the sofa" issue be their problem not yours.

People will treat you like a doormat if you act like one. I'm not blaming you, you are young and have only just finished surviving a childhood where quiet obedience was a survival strategy but you don't have to squish your own needs to prioritise other people's wants.

The drama!! They were an hour later than they said they would be. They called to relay the information. That’s it. They came home sober.

Often the case with nights out, you just don’t know how the evening goes, sometimes you get home early as it’s a bit of a flop, sometimes you need to hang on a bit longer. This is just par for the course with babysitting.

They called the baby sitter who is family, to check on the children and say ‘gonna have another drink’. Babysitter said ‘okay’. If that was me I would have said ‘yeah fine, no worries, just chilling and watching Netflix’. But the OP should have said what she really feels which is….wait for it…..

I’ve had a busy day
I’ve got a busy day tomorrow
I can’t drive tired
I don’t understand this show on netflix
There’s no blankets on the sofa
Buses don’t start till 10am on Sunday
I’ll start a thread on Mumsnet - where people have advised me to just leave and call the Police.

The fucking drama! I think it’s best to decline any babysitting jobs in the future OP.

Oh course you did. You had every authority to say "sorry, you said you'd be back at 11 and I've got an early start at work tomorrow, so I need to go"

Even if you think they'll ignore you, you still say it. You're basically giving them license to mess you about, by giving them the impression that it's okay.

I find it bizarre yhat you didn’t say “ no come home now , we agreed 11, I have a busy day tomorrow. “ You sound unable to be assertive with them and in that case should avoid their company and people you can’t be assertive with and not agree to babysit again. They can pay someone as they obviously don’t respect your time.

This.

Commas are your friend @ffsisthisreal : )

The kids will be fine.

I used to babysit a lot too and would get a call
like this too occasionally. One dad wss
quite drunk when he got back, he asked me
how much he owed me, I was honest but totally could have said more 🤣
I didn’t usually mind but sometimes I was so tired and wanted to go home. The only time it annoyed me was when I’d agreed to babysit on a work night and said I can’t go past 11 or something and then they got back later. Usually they call and apologise to say they were running late.
And I was being paid. I never would have done it for free!

I think you're the one being childish honestly. "Both parents should never drink at the same time" is a rule you've just made up and are insisting is an absolute. Many people would disagree that this is an absolute standard.

Baffled by all the people who think someone's kids are automatically at risk because they've been drinking. What do you think is going to happen? Massive drama and overreaction. They were sober enough to call and check on the kids, sober enough to get themselves home, stop making a meal of it. (I don't drink before anyone starts. Just think it's silly.)

Honestly OP you needed to tell them when they called that you had plans the next day so needed to be home by midnight at the absolute latest (or whatever) and stick to it. They’re not mindreaders and if you said it was fine to stay out then they just took you at your wird. They called to check, you said fine, so they stayed out. You really only have yoursekf to blame surely?

Jesus you have authority over your own life! This involves you and you have agency.

you agreed 11, they want to change it to 3am.

you don’t want that, so you say No.

ive never heard of anyone so weirdly passive.

When they called, instead of saying everything was OK I'd have told them I was ready and waiting to head home as agreed, and where were they?