AIBU to challenge my partner's Sunday football commitment and family time?

I think these things are fine when you both have time like this for a hobby however it often seems to be men playing football/golf/cycling whilst women don’t do this for themselves. Personally I think this is because women put children first whereas men put themselves first and children/family second.

Since this seems to be an unwritten rule ie what you as a woman think is best, you need to wake up and understand that your DH is on a different wavelength. Don’t tell him/ask him just quietly say that it’s great he’s going to football and that you also had planned a Saturday morning activity (insert Pilates or even better a group activity). Then on Saturday just get up and go out for your Pilates etc. it’s really that easy. If your DC do activities it’ll be easier looking at who’s doing what and it not all falling to you.

I don’t think it’s unreasonable for your partner to want a hobby, it’s healthy. As previous poster has said, you should then get equal time for your own hobby or interest.

It won’t be every Sunday of the year that he plays, there will be breaks.

My dad played cricket every weekend; we went and watched. Take the kids to see their dad, they might like it x

It's half a day..... a weekend is two whole days. It's really not much, and everyone deserves some time to call their own. Take the kids to watch him play - they might enjoy it!

I thought we had a unwritten rule that weekends are sacred family time while the children are young

Does he know about this rule?

Are the matches all year round? No off season?

It’s difficult, I think it’s good for both parents to have a hobby and get time to themselves. But he should have had a discussion with you about it first. Do you get any time to yourself? Maybe carve some out on a Sunday morning to do what you want to do whilst he spends time with the children. Then have Saturdays as strictly family time where you’re all together.

It’s a tough one if it’s every single week, if it were a Saturday morning I’d say fine as you then have the rest of the weekend. Saying that I used to be a runner and dh used to cycle and it wasn’t a big deal on weekends that we’d disappear for our own time for a few hours, and we never made it a big deal to the kids but just that Sunday afternoon timing sucks!!

So you had a rule in your head for family time but never told him that and are now annoyed he's broke a rule he didn't know about?

Personally I would just make sure you take time for yourself, you could do a few hours Sunday morning? That leaves Saturday for family stuff. I suspect that in a few years weekends will look different and your children will be doing hobbies etc anyway

Do you both get equal down time/hobby time?