How common is it for friends/family not to repay loans?

DH lent his sister $1500 and never got it back. Then he consigned a loan for his son. Son stopped making payments and DH had to pay off loan, $8000. On top of this, both his sister and son refused to speak to him after even though he only asked them once to repay the money. Nothing destroys relationships faster than loaning money.

When my brother was going through his divorce he was struggling finding the money to keep the house, so he asked our dad for a LOAN. Dad loaned him the money on the proviso that he’d start paying it back when he got back onto his feet. This was 20 years ago, my dad passed away 15 years ago and he’d never attempted to pay a penny.

I tackled him about paying it for my mums sake, the shitty arsehole got pissy with me and said “If I’d known that was a loan I’d never have fucking taken it’, what a piece of work. I’m still pissed off with him. Mums savings, which weren’t much have all but gone, and she’s been very careful with barely any holidays. He had 15k off them, he told my mum that he’d discussed with his second wife that they were ok if she needed to release equity in her property if she ran out of money, he’s quite unbelievable.

Mum has amended her will, she’s made sure that I’m awarded the same amount, the two grandchildren get a substantial sum then the rest is split 60-40 in my favour. My husband and myself have been there for her and live close by and help where we can. She’s currently having her bathroom renovated and we’re buying all the bathroom fittings and she’s paying the plumber for fitting.

All can say is he has to live with himself knowing the god damn truth that it was a loan. My dad was always fair and would never give something to one and not the other. I feel sorry for my mum, we don’t know why he’s denied it, he’s so selfish, hopefully Karma will catch up with him 😡

2 years ago I loaned my sister half my savings. She needed it to help her leave her boyfriend. She's older than me, bigger house than me, less kids, designer everything, loads of cosmetic surgery and upkeep. Said she would repay me with her work bonus in a month or two.
Well she's still with her bf and and no sign of my 5k. But she's just bought a 95k car outright....
I've asked a few times and she just says I don't need it and that it would just sit in my savings. She Just bought her 11y/o a £300 handbag for school. She's right I don't need my money back yet. I feel embarrassed to keep asking as she must have it.
Think I'll have to lie and invent a reason i need it back.

The only family member that lends money to family is rich. I work for them & see their financials. They use legal contracts, including repayments & market interest. I was shocked how ruthless it is as family members with these loans were/are in dire need of help & didn't qualify for standard loans. So they're profiting off family who couldn't get loans elsewhere. I wonder how they reconcile it at church every Sunday. One is their own sibling who needed the money to escape an abusive marriage.

There's also those that just beg for money & can't repay. My aunt has started calling DF, sobbing for money & realised it works. DM is livid as they don't have much to spare & haven't had a holiday in years. I don't know why DF gives in as aunt's DH just takes it & blows it all.

I tightly manage our money as I learned early on DH would give to anyone who asks as he's soft and non confrontational. Hed never chase it back. So people know not to ask as I'm the meanie who controls the purse strings.

Tbrh- I have asked family for loans in the past when I’ve been desperate and then when it came to paying back I was still in a bad situation and I would justify it by thinking that they could afford it more than me. Not my finest hour but in case you actually wanted a perspective from someone who has loaned from their family and struggled to repay it.

You hear about it quite a bit anecdotally, so you could reasonably assume it has at least some basis to it. The true extent- who really knows.

People who ask for money from friends must be pretty desperate or unable to get it elsewhere (such as on credit, which suggests they are generally financially unreliable to the point of a low credit score). Someone in that kind of situation, with historical money issues isn't going to suddenly fix that or find the money to be able to pay back a loan if a friend is foolish enough to agree to to one.

Even worse, they don't want to get it elsewhere because that would mean paying interest or incurring financial penalties when they pay it back, clearly there is some sort of view that it "doesn't count" in the same way if a friend or family lends it because there are no sanctions, they can just go MIA if they really want.

Good question which I cant answer lol. However, you are right about the horror stories you read on here. Loaning money seems to always change the dynamic of any relationship for the worse. I dont know why but the person who has borrowed the money always seem to be most aggrieved when asked to pay it back. I would never lend anyone any money ever. You did the right thing.