To be furious with DH for this?

Let him go on his trip to Ibiza. It will just add to the proof that he is a POS and you’ll have more justification to get rid. If you need any more justification than you already have. Get him out of your hair for a bit and tell him to not bother unpacking when he gets home.

This also hapoened to me and i was furious. Had had a c ssction too and no family to help.
Needless to say we only lasted 9 mths longer and when we split he spent 3 mths going out and not having dd overnight, even though i was also back to full time work.
Hes showing you how he is now.

I agree with the locks. The problem with trying to teach them a lesson, or appealing to their better nature in the hope of change and reflection, with my OH anyway, is that they “rebel” further as they’re so used to being enabled and entitled that they take great offence at being asked to behave as thoughtful, caring, responsible adults. I’ve wasted 30 years trying everything, thinking there must be some words I can use that’ll get him to see, to change. It’s only now, with the help of therapy, that I’ve come to realise that I can only manage my own behaviour and responses. I’ll never change him. It was telling that when I started to push back at home, and not tolerate it, I was told by him “hmm I don’t think you are going to give me any leaway any more”!! I hope OP’s husband isn’t on the same scale, but initial signs aren’t promising.

This. I’ve had a marriage like this, with an entitled, enabled man child who suits himself pretty much the whole time. He pulled similar stunts after the birth of our first child. His mother pretty well thinks he’s the Messiah despite some appalling behaviour, infidelity, verbal and emotional abuse. It’s a losing wicket. I am embarrassed to admit and to my eternal shame I am still here 30 years later. He has shown me who he is many times, and it’s only now that I’m having therapy and learning that I have a voice, opinions and rights. He’s isn’t liking the new world order at home, but honestly- your OH has shown you who he is. I beg you to believe him.

I’m so sorry that is just awful and clearly he is encouraged by his mum. I don’t usually say this but if he doesn’t see this is wrong you should think about going it alone. You will always be sad with this guy and his mother, and that will drain you. Wish I could hivd you a hug.

Sure. Just like you didn’t like my comment, so you posted about it.

The pp’s comment wasn’t an opinion btw. It picked out a fact from the OP and stated it in a sarcastic way. Didn’t even have the gumption to express an opinion properly. I’ll say what I like about it thanks.

Just read about his return and the tickets. Take his phone power off and hide he wont remember where it went, burn tickets, film sick and collapse. Get him out of your house. The holiday was my last straw I am so angry on your behalf. Family sound like common scum.

Poor children.
"Lose" your keys and get new locks.
Let the loser take you to court.

Report him to 101 for his drunken abuse and of terrifying you and your children.

What a loser.

Yes. He has no history of being abusive or unkind, no did she say she didn't love him or that their relationship had been struggling. He did one stupid/selfish thing, for what he should obviously apologize. But from there to blowing up her life and making huge life-changing decisions, especially when she's in a vulnerable postpartum state is a huge mistake.

And posters who are egging her on and gleefully living out their bitterness and hatred through the op, are doing her a great disservice to put it mildly.

I hope you locked him out. I have 2 DSs in their 30s and I would be ashamed of them if they left the mother of their babies alone on her 1st night home. He can have an evening out later, as for deserving to go out get drunk and ignore phone calls as a father of 2 he gave up that right. I was lucky after giving birth to my 3 dC I felt fantastic full of energy but my husband would definitely felt some of that energy if he had deserted me on my first night home. When he does get back he should be allowed minimal rest and maximum child care. He needs a good kick.

Jeez, the Opinion Police has turned up 🙄
The perils of asking "am I being unreasonable" means that sometimes you might hear things you don't like.

You ought to come back and apologise for this. Will you?

👏👏👏 Excellent post

Have you actually read the OP’s comments?

Awful behaviour
have no more children with this idiot

No, and WADR allowing some bitter man-haters to egg you on and blow up a relationship when you're fragile is a terrible mistake.

No question he was being selfish, but people are not perfect. Unless he's like this all the time - and I highly doubt you would have had this baby with him if he was - it's something to discuss, and to get him to apologise for. Not something about which you make life changing decisions when you're PP.

This is your life the bitter posters are gleefully ruining; don't allow them.

And that was 5 minutes past the latest time HE decided he would be home. The OP said she didn't want him to go out at all - but he went out giving her 'no choice' at 4pm. Leaving her post-partum, first night out of hospital, with a newborn and a toddler.

And then the rest.

You can click 'see all' in the OP to see all the OP's info and updates. Quite a good strategy for avoiding making sarky comments to women in distress.

Well, you are also entitled to a night out and to celebrate the birth of the baby. Feel stronger soon and then leave your NVDH with the kids as soon as you can and stay out the whole day into the late evening.

This "the man is entitled to a night out with his mates" crap totally chaps my hide. As if they went through ANYTHING resembling a birth. They "deserve" a night out after they push a grapefruit out their urethra.

After that and ALL the other stuff he has put you through, he should go back to live with his mommy so she can continue to bottlefeed him.

Please don’t let him back in the house. He doesn’t deserve a minute more of your time. I could never, ever get past this. 💐

Is that the thing you picked up from this thread? 🤯
He didn't rock up until the next morning, vomited everywhere, passed out on the floor, has no job, bought tickets to ibiza without telling op and buggered off to the pub the night op was home from hospital with her new born.
She was entitled to feel mad about the fact he'd abandoned her with the children the second she came out of hospital with the baby to get pissed, even if he wasn't late home

Have you spoken to him yet OP? What’s he had to say for himself?

I can't believe I'm reading this!! He should WANT to be at home with you all!!

Paper tickets exist. I'm not sure why you're so adamant that people don't still like to have paper, but ok, live in your own bubble.

So he was five minutes late according to the time you posted this.

Oh OP I’m so sorry you’ve been treated this way. This was absolutely horrific to read. Please free yourself from this creature