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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be furious with DH for this?

888 replies

Coffeecherrymama · 25/04/2026 22:05

First night home since giving birth and DH has gone out with his mates drinking and still isn’t home and he isn’t answering any calls or messages. He didn’t give me any choice, he just said he was going out with his “mates” and then left and said he would be back before 10pm but he’s still not home! I’m so angry that he has just left me here with our newborn when he knows I’m struggling but his mum says I’m overreacting and that he’s “entitled to a night out”! I feel like I could just cry to be honest! AIBU?

OP posts:
Happyjoe · 25/04/2026 22:36

GinaandGin · 25/04/2026 22:30

Please
Are you a man
If you are a woman you are a disgrace
Shame on you
Making excuses for piss poor behaviour

From either man or woman imo - disgrace indeed.

muggart · 25/04/2026 22:34

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LBFseBrom · 25/04/2026 22:34

Is he home now?
No, he should not have gone out on your first night home with a new baby, that was selfish.
However I hope he is now back home and contrite, not too drunk.

Happyjoe · 25/04/2026 22:34

Coffeecherrymama · 25/04/2026 22:09

Our second child x

His mum is saying he’s “entitled” to a night out and “entitled to celebrate the baby” but I’m absolutely furious

So he takes after his mum!
No, he's being selfish.

Justthisandthat · 25/04/2026 22:34

Coffeecherrymama · 25/04/2026 22:15

Because I called her assuming she would be appalled at his behaviour and get him to come back home

She knows he’s being a twat but giving a balanced argument to not add fuel to the fire, basically trying to keep the peace.

GinaandGin · 25/04/2026 22:32

LadyTable · 25/04/2026 22:17

But was he even late at that point?

Why are you justifying bad behaviour

somanychristmaslights · 25/04/2026 22:32

Going out your first night home is pretty shitty. But don’t get him mum involved, she’s going to be no help and just make you feel worse.

LadyTable · 25/04/2026 22:31

ArtAngel · 25/04/2026 22:21

Hiya, MIL!

He was ‘late’ the minute he stepped out the door, leaving his newly delivered wife, newborn and older child on her first night home after hospital.

’entitled to celebrate the baby’ what absolute fucking crap is this?

Why are people being weird?

Yes he shouldn’t have gone out but the fact is he did and he said he’d be home by 10.

Given the time the OP started the thread, I simply asked if he was late at the time of the call 🤷‍♀️

GinaandGin · 25/04/2026 22:30

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Please
Are you a man
If you are a woman you are a disgrace
Shame on you
Making excuses for piss poor behaviour

Teacupover5 · 25/04/2026 22:29

Chill out -I was glad my DH was out and I got my lovely baby to myself

GinaandGin · 25/04/2026 22:28

Coffeecherrymama · 25/04/2026 22:09

Our second child x

His mum is saying he’s “entitled” to a night out and “entitled to celebrate the baby” but I’m absolutely furious

Send this man baby back to his mummy

Justthisandthat · 25/04/2026 22:28

Coffeecherrymama · 25/04/2026 22:24

He isn’t usually like this

What did he do once home with the first child?

25 acting like a teen, no sense of responsibility. Sorry OP, you’re with a Moron!

jumpingjohnny · 25/04/2026 22:28

More to the point, a new mum shouldn't be left alone for long (if at all possible). Complications can show up after you've been discharged e.g. retained placenta or eclampsia.

Coffeecherrymama · 25/04/2026 22:26

LadyTable · 25/04/2026 22:17

But was he even late at that point?

No. But that’s not the point. He shouldn’t have gone out on our first night home

OP posts:
Coffeecherrymama · 25/04/2026 22:24

Justthisandthat · 25/04/2026 22:23

He should be celebrating the baby with you at home.

This is unforgivable in my eyes.

How old are the pair of you? I’m expecting teens.

I’m 27 and DH is 25

OP posts:
Coffeecherrymama · 25/04/2026 22:24

He isn’t usually like this

OP posts:
Justthisandthat · 25/04/2026 22:23

Coffeecherrymama · 25/04/2026 22:09

Our second child x

His mum is saying he’s “entitled” to a night out and “entitled to celebrate the baby” but I’m absolutely furious

He should be celebrating the baby with you at home.

This is unforgivable in my eyes.

How old are the pair of you? I’m expecting teens.

NuffSaidSam · 25/04/2026 22:22

Pinkissmart · 25/04/2026 22:17

Cut it out. It’s not OP’s fault

Of course it's not the OP's fault he's gone to the pub!

If he's always like this then it's very much her choice for him to be her DH and the father of her child though. If it isn't her choice and she's been forced into it then she's got much bigger problems than the fact that he's gone to the pub.

ArtAngel · 25/04/2026 22:21

LadyTable · 25/04/2026 22:17

But was he even late at that point?

Hiya, MIL!

He was ‘late’ the minute he stepped out the door, leaving his newly delivered wife, newborn and older child on her first night home after hospital.

’entitled to celebrate the baby’ what absolute fucking crap is this?

thepariscrimefiles · 25/04/2026 22:20

He's a fucking twat and his mum can fuck off as well.

DurinsBane · 25/04/2026 22:19

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Are you having a laugh?

thistimelastweek · 25/04/2026 22:19

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You joking?
We are talking about a father of two not a hamster.

SunMoonandChocolate · 25/04/2026 22:18

LadyTable · 25/04/2026 22:17

But was he even late at that point?

Does it matter if he was late, he shouldn't have gone out and left the OP in the first place. He's a prize arsehole!

LadyTable · 25/04/2026 22:17

Coffeecherrymama · 25/04/2026 22:15

Because I called her assuming she would be appalled at his behaviour and get him to come back home

But was he even late at that point?

SunMoonandChocolate · 25/04/2026 22:17

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Piss off MIL!