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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Was I right to complain and would you be worried?

233 replies

Wooorid · 20/04/2026 20:56

Just had a delivery driver from Dominos unable
to find our house (village but not the easiest to find, though Amazon manages fine!). They called my phone and were clearly stressed,
I could see them going back and forth every few minutes while on the phone but because of how far we are from the main road I couldn’t go out (dc at home). He started raising his voice saying ‘im on ‘green’ lane!’ Almost angry over and over.

I felt really intimidated. He didn’t say anything to make me feel like that it was just the tone and then general way the conversation was. He must have then realised where it was and hung up, then absolutely raced down our drive, I thought he was going to hit the house. When I opened the door he pushed the pizza to me and didn’t say a word then drove off again reversing at high speed. I was on the phone to the dominos place literally at the time he arrived as they had called me to say their driver couldn’t find where we are. She could tell I was shocked when he turned up and was probing to ask if I was ok, I said I was quite shocked and wasn’t really sure what had just happened and that their are kids often playing and his speed in particular really scared me.

She said she would feed it back to him (no pun intended). I then said I didn’t want her to do that and didn’t want a fuss made as I was worried he would come back and do something awful to us. I have anxiety. Anyway she said she had a duty to feed it back to him and she apologised, she was very nice.

I feel really shaken up. For context I am often alone at home with small small children as DH often late at work and we are down a dark ish lane by the village. I am probably overthinking but I feel terrible for even admitting what he had done as he was obviously having a shit night and on next to no pay and no I am also worried I’ve unintentionally riled him up. I ordered food in as I was stressed with work and now this has just made me more stressed!

OP posts:
TheLovelinessOfDemons · 21/04/2026 20:50

I always give very precise delivery instructions when I order, which honestly doesn't help if I get a Brazilian driver who doesn't speak English, luckily I speak Brazilian Portuguese, I've been known to go up the steps in my slippers and pyjamas and yell "down here!" in Portuguese before.

Partypants83 · 21/04/2026 20:18

Fuss about nothing

Bloodycrossstitch · 21/04/2026 20:12

Also in my area at least, what3words is useless because very few delivery drivers use it.

Bloodycrossstitch · 21/04/2026 20:07

PollyBell · 21/04/2026 03:41

People can blame anxiety or what other mental health issues all they like, that may explain how they feel but to complain when someone is not doing anything wrong crosses a line

I mean shouting down the phone at a customer and driving at dangerous speeds both absolutely count as doing something wrong. And it’s not like she went out of her way to complain, the restaurant phoned her as it was happening.

I do think OP is blowing it somewhat out of proportion though but that can be easy to do when you’re already stressed.

mamajong · 21/04/2026 17:49

ToKittyornottoKitty · 20/04/2026 21:05

He was frustrated as he’d been lost for a long time, the food was going cold and he was due back in work. He was a human that got frustrated and drove too fast. Your reaction wasn’t rational as you were stressed and human also. Try and put it in perspective. The domino’s driver wants to get his job done, get paid and go home, he doesn’t want to do awful things to you and end up in prison because your house was hard to find.

The what 3 words suggestion by another poster is a great idea.

This! If you can over react to the extent you have how can you not see its the same for him. He was stressed finding your house and drove fast because it was getting cold/hecwas running late. You've made a mountain out of a molehill here, let it go and move on

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 21/04/2026 17:20

Again - WHAT THREE WORDS is your friend in these situations

CarbootJunction · 21/04/2026 16:59

All the houses in our lane are named not numbered, so I always put "Look for the tall trees/white wall/lamp" in the comments box. Not sure if it helps the drivers, but pizza is usually hot when it arrives 😄

BlackeyedSusan · 21/04/2026 15:38

He was probably just really stressed he couldn't find your house. You were stressed because he couldn't find you. Probably a big misunderstanding.

Dearover · 21/04/2026 15:25

The OP initially describes him as "almost angry". It's only in later post he suddenly becomes furious. By this evening he will be 7ft tall, muscular and steaming with rage.

ViaRia01 · 21/04/2026 14:39

@BlueSlate in a subsequent post OP wrote that he seemed absolutely furious when he arrived. She described his driving as ‘racing’ up her driveway and that he reversed at high speed - safe reversing is slow and cautious, not at high speed.

I stand by everything I wrote earlier.

OP may be overreacting, I’m not claiming to know one way or another. But I am not here picking apart what she is saying to prove that she is in the wrong. I am taking her post at face value - he seemed furious, he was shouting, he didn’t say a word to her when he arrived, he was racing up the driveway, reversing at speed. I am believing all of those statements she made because I don’t have any reason not to.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 21/04/2026 13:39

Dutch1e · 21/04/2026 13:23

Not always, just with niggling twats.

So if someone ‘niggles’ you, you go full on unhinged overreaction? Wow. 🤣🤣🤣

Backawayfromthesausage · 21/04/2026 13:38

Op are you getting help for your anxiety? Beta blockers can help, I would speak to your gp. You don’t need to just put up with the symptoms of anxiety, there is help available.

Newyearawaits · 21/04/2026 13:28

Wooorid · 20/04/2026 21:16

@Dearover i meant because he’s going to have to face feedback now because of me. Not just that he would do something because he couldn’t find the house

You are clearly very anxious and I am sorry about that.
Your reactions are ott

ToKittyornottoKitty · 21/04/2026 13:26

Dutch1e · 21/04/2026 13:23

Not always, just with niggling twats.

What does that even mean? How was the driver ‘niggling’?

Dutch1e · 21/04/2026 13:23

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 21/04/2026 13:01

Are you always this aggressive? Because I think you genuinely need help. You say he should have intervention whilst ranting that he’s an ‘aggro prick’ (whereas he’s more likely a stressed delivery driver with targets). Save your rage for genuine harassment.

Not always, just with niggling twats.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 21/04/2026 13:03

And OP, if you are prone to anxiety and spiralling (I am!) and you get stressed about being on your own with the children at night, I agree with PP that you could use help. You presumably don’t want the children to pick up on it

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 21/04/2026 13:01

Dutch1e · 21/04/2026 12:05

Good, glad you grasped it... because I'd be angry.

Are you always this aggressive? Because I think you genuinely need help. You say he should have intervention whilst ranting that he’s an ‘aggro prick’ (whereas he’s more likely a stressed delivery driver with targets). Save your rage for genuine harassment.

7238SM · 21/04/2026 12:17

OP- please get in touch with your mental health support team. If you don't have one, please contact your GP for an appointment.

This level an angst and anxiety isn't normal and might be being felt by your children also. Flowers

Dutch1e · 21/04/2026 12:05

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 21/04/2026 12:00

And respectfully, your post sounds very angry and aggressive, ironically

Good, glad you grasped it... because I'd be angry.

amargaritaplease · 21/04/2026 12:04

Wooorid · 20/04/2026 21:40

I don’t know if it was deliberate but raising his voice down the phone felt intimidating

How pathetic

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 21/04/2026 12:00

Dutch1e · 21/04/2026 11:44

If some aggro prick started arking up at me I'd be pretty upset too.

The amount of apologising for bullying men on this thread is unbelievable.

No OP, you're not being unreasonable to complain.

Fuck that guy and his shitty moods, he needs some professional intervention to manage his propensity to fly off the handle.

And respectfully, your post sounds very angry and aggressive, ironically

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 21/04/2026 11:58

Dutch1e · 21/04/2026 11:44

If some aggro prick started arking up at me I'd be pretty upset too.

The amount of apologising for bullying men on this thread is unbelievable.

No OP, you're not being unreasonable to complain.

Fuck that guy and his shitty moods, he needs some professional intervention to manage his propensity to fly off the handle.

Bullying men? Someone who has to deliver in a timely manner or he gets sacked - he couldn’t find the place and it does sound hard to find. If he then runs late he gets a mouthful from the next customer. I would be stressed too.

Dutch1e · 21/04/2026 11:44

If some aggro prick started arking up at me I'd be pretty upset too.

The amount of apologising for bullying men on this thread is unbelievable.

No OP, you're not being unreasonable to complain.

Fuck that guy and his shitty moods, he needs some professional intervention to manage his propensity to fly off the handle.

OnlyMabelInTheBuilding · 21/04/2026 11:35

We used to live in a very hard to find house. It’s on you to provide very clear instructions at the time of order.

Having anxiety is irrelevant.

Viviennemary · 21/04/2026 11:33

You admit you have a hard to find house. I agree its lucky it was something unimporttant as a pizza delivery and not one of the emergency services. Not surprised the driver was annoyed.

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