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AIBU?

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Was I right to complain and would you be worried?

233 replies

Wooorid · 20/04/2026 20:56

Just had a delivery driver from Dominos unable
to find our house (village but not the easiest to find, though Amazon manages fine!). They called my phone and were clearly stressed,
I could see them going back and forth every few minutes while on the phone but because of how far we are from the main road I couldn’t go out (dc at home). He started raising his voice saying ‘im on ‘green’ lane!’ Almost angry over and over.

I felt really intimidated. He didn’t say anything to make me feel like that it was just the tone and then general way the conversation was. He must have then realised where it was and hung up, then absolutely raced down our drive, I thought he was going to hit the house. When I opened the door he pushed the pizza to me and didn’t say a word then drove off again reversing at high speed. I was on the phone to the dominos place literally at the time he arrived as they had called me to say their driver couldn’t find where we are. She could tell I was shocked when he turned up and was probing to ask if I was ok, I said I was quite shocked and wasn’t really sure what had just happened and that their are kids often playing and his speed in particular really scared me.

She said she would feed it back to him (no pun intended). I then said I didn’t want her to do that and didn’t want a fuss made as I was worried he would come back and do something awful to us. I have anxiety. Anyway she said she had a duty to feed it back to him and she apologised, she was very nice.

I feel really shaken up. For context I am often alone at home with small small children as DH often late at work and we are down a dark ish lane by the village. I am probably overthinking but I feel terrible for even admitting what he had done as he was obviously having a shit night and on next to no pay and no I am also worried I’ve unintentionally riled him up. I ordered food in as I was stressed with work and now this has just made me more stressed!

OP posts:
RandomCactus · 22/04/2026 20:49

Wooorid · 22/04/2026 17:30

I’ve had time to reflect on the posts and also my reaction.

I’m genuinely surprised that people have such low expectations.

I’d lose my job if I interacted with a client like that. Being stressed at work surely isn’t an excuse for that behaviour? it’s not like we were getting something for free, we’d spent over 25 quid!

I think the bizarrely low expectations are that someone “would come back and do something awful to us” because of sub-optimal feedback to his manager. Most of us have a bit more faith in humanity.

Passingthrough123 · 22/04/2026 20:48

Wooorid · 22/04/2026 20:30

@Passingthrough123 don’t recall saying I’d be happy if he lost his job.

You said you were more sure that his behaviour was unacceptable, which suggests you don’t regret complaining. My point is that your complaint may well have got him sacked.

Enrichetta · 22/04/2026 20:45

In the meantime - while you’re sorting out your anxiety - stock your freezer with some pizzas

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 22/04/2026 20:40

He was clearly stressed by you being unclear and because he would have to deliver everything and get back within a strict timeframe.

You were both stressed but you assume he’s a psycho who’s going to stalk you because he was frustrated. Neither of you handled it well but if your anxiety is so bad that you can’t be at home with the children at night then you need to address this

ToKittyornottoKitty · 22/04/2026 20:33

Wooorid · 22/04/2026 20:30

@Passingthrough123 don’t recall saying I’d be happy if he lost his job.

You’ve said plenty that imply it though, that he needs bare basic manners to do this job, that his behaviour was unacceptable, you’ve complained to his manager and thought he’d turn violent, and you said you’d loose your job if you behaved like that.

Wooorid · 22/04/2026 20:30

Passingthrough123 · 22/04/2026 20:15

So you'd be happy if he lost his job over it?

Him speeding on your driveway wasn't good but he was clearly stressed by then and I would've cut him some slack and dropped the complaint. Your inference that he would come back and do something nasty to you or your family or your house was despicable – if you said that to his manager, imagine how he might've felt if she'd relayed it back to him.

@Passingthrough123 don’t recall saying I’d be happy if he lost his job.

OP posts:
Passingthrough123 · 22/04/2026 20:15

Wooorid · 22/04/2026 19:56

@ToKittyornottoKitty well I am engaging with the ongoing posts. I’m less annoyed about it now and more sure that his behaviour was unacceptable.

So you'd be happy if he lost his job over it?

Him speeding on your driveway wasn't good but he was clearly stressed by then and I would've cut him some slack and dropped the complaint. Your inference that he would come back and do something nasty to you or your family or your house was despicable – if you said that to his manager, imagine how he might've felt if she'd relayed it back to him.

Moonnstarz · 22/04/2026 20:04

Wooorid · 22/04/2026 19:40

@bugalugs45 that IS literally what I did. Read above.

But if he was that close you could have walked outside the house. You didn't need to walk down the whole lane or whatever but you could have spoken on the phone and said I am coming outside now. Look for the lady wearing the blue jumper waving at you.
Your kids were asleep and surely nipping out for a few mins would not have been an issue here (and no different for example than going into the garden or if like me you have a dryer in your garage, going down to sort washing).

PoppinjayPolly · 22/04/2026 19:59

Wooorid · 22/04/2026 19:56

@ToKittyornottoKitty well I am engaging with the ongoing posts. I’m less annoyed about it now and more sure that his behaviour was unacceptable.

well you go ahead @Wooorid and make sure this lowly server knows he annoyed you, his better!
laughable you say I have a chip on my shoulder, what are you calling your paranoia that he’s going to retaliate for your complaint… highly doubt his manager will take it to any level, never mind what you seem to expect!

Enrichetta · 22/04/2026 19:59

And if one of your kids were to lose their minimum wage/zero hours job for one reason or another - there are so many reasons that are not necessarily the fault of said kids, - no doubt they’ll return to your lovely home, sleep in their childhood bedrooms and eat your lovingly prepared dinners…

You probably know that not all the ‘kids’ out their delivering pizzas into the small hours have the same backup system…

ToKittyornottoKitty · 22/04/2026 19:58

Wooorid · 22/04/2026 19:56

@ToKittyornottoKitty well I am engaging with the ongoing posts. I’m less annoyed about it now and more sure that his behaviour was unacceptable.

But he hasn’t come back to harm you like you feared so you can hopefully also see you were over reacting on that bit.

LastHotel · 22/04/2026 19:56

Wooorid · 22/04/2026 19:52

@Enrichetta yes, I don’t think it’s an excuse for driving erratically on our drive or thrusting a pizza into my hands without a word. Maybe I have higher standards! I’d be mortified if one of my kids did that in their job.

But you do think it’s perfectly reasonable to overreact and complain because you “have anxiety” and can’t cope with a small thing not going exactly the way you wanted?

Wooorid · 22/04/2026 19:56

ToKittyornottoKitty · 22/04/2026 19:55

It was 2 days ago though, why are you still so wound up about it? You sound more annoyed at him
now than you did in your OP

@ToKittyornottoKitty well I am engaging with the ongoing posts. I’m less annoyed about it now and more sure that his behaviour was unacceptable.

OP posts:
ToKittyornottoKitty · 22/04/2026 19:55

Wooorid · 22/04/2026 19:52

@Enrichetta yes, I don’t think it’s an excuse for driving erratically on our drive or thrusting a pizza into my hands without a word. Maybe I have higher standards! I’d be mortified if one of my kids did that in their job.

It was 2 days ago though, why are you still so wound up about it? You sound more annoyed at him
now than you did in your OP

Wooorid · 22/04/2026 19:52

Enrichetta · 22/04/2026 19:49

you need to have a decent skill set communication wise and know to deal with customers when providing a service

a guy who delivers pizzas who is seriously stressed because he’ll be penalised or even lose his job if he doesn’t get all his deliveries done in time.

Really?!!

If ever there is a time to give your head a wobble, this is it

@Enrichetta yes, I don’t think it’s an excuse for driving erratically on our drive or thrusting a pizza into my hands without a word. Maybe I have higher standards! I’d be mortified if one of my kids did that in their job.

OP posts:
Enrichetta · 22/04/2026 19:49

you need to have a decent skill set communication wise and know to deal with customers when providing a service

a guy who delivers pizzas who is seriously stressed because he’ll be penalised or even lose his job if he doesn’t get all his deliveries done in time.

Really?!!

If ever there is a time to give your head a wobble, this is it

Wooorid · 22/04/2026 19:44

PoppinjayPolly · 22/04/2026 18:57

Well? Is it because you think they should be subservient as they are less than you in your corporate role… or you don’t think you have to be that nice to your customers?

@PoppinjayPolly eh? Where did I say they were lesser? Do you have a chip on your shoulder perhaps?

Of course if you work in hospitality you need to have a decent skill set communication wise and know to deal with customers when providing a service. Would you want your Tui holiday host to be a misery taking you round Athens, for example?

In any case the basic fact is that he should have had the bare minimum grasp of manners when delivering food. And shouldn’t be speeding.

OP posts:
Wooorid · 22/04/2026 19:40

bugalugs45 · 22/04/2026 18:48

If you were close enough to see the car, you could have said drive really slowly down the road and ‘stop’ when i tell you , then turn left/ right, it’s definitely not rocket science .

@bugalugs45 that IS literally what I did. Read above.

OP posts:
PoppinjayPolly · 22/04/2026 19:38

UnctuousUnicorns · 22/04/2026 19:22

Obviously, ideally everyone would be polite and respectful to one another, but, rightly or wrongly, people tend to particularly expect those working in hospitality to be pleasant and courteous, which they are, 99.9% of the time, despite dealing with appalling treatment from some members of the public.

Can’t agree with you more! It’s been a good 15 years since was a student and worked in hospitality, the behaviour of some as they felt those in hospitality as lesser than them was appalling)”!

UnctuousUnicorns · 22/04/2026 19:22

PoppinjayPolly · 22/04/2026 19:07

so only hospitality workers are required to be nice now?

Obviously, ideally everyone would be polite and respectful to one another, but, rightly or wrongly, people tend to particularly expect those working in hospitality to be pleasant and courteous, which they are, 99.9% of the time, despite dealing with appalling treatment from some members of the public.

PoppinjayPolly · 22/04/2026 19:07

UnctuousUnicorns · 22/04/2026 19:02

The clue's in the word, surely?

so only hospitality workers are required to be nice now?

J111JSJ · 22/04/2026 19:06

For heaven's sake ! The guy was lost, stressed, trying to get your food to you on time before he got into major trouble with his boss over a lousy job which pays just about minimum wage. Give the guy a break. Can't even think why you posted this.

UnctuousUnicorns · 22/04/2026 19:02

PoppinjayPolly · 22/04/2026 18:35

If anything you should be particularly nice to customers in hospitality?

why? Why do hospitality staff need to be nicer?

The clue's in the word, surely?

PoppinjayPolly · 22/04/2026 18:57

Wooorid · 22/04/2026 18:43

@PoppinjayPolly homestly can’t believe that’s a genuine question 😅

Well? Is it because you think they should be subservient as they are less than you in your corporate role… or you don’t think you have to be that nice to your customers?

Livpool · 22/04/2026 18:54

This all sounds so over the top! You acknowledge your address can be difficult to find. And you saw him but couldn’t tell him he had gone past?!

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