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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

It's another inheritance one...

233 replies

Meudantte · 19/04/2026 18:17

Mary is in her 80s. Her DH died 15 years ago.

Two children
Jane in her 60s with two grown up children.
Sarah who died a decade ago in her 50s. Left a widower and two grown up children.

Before Sarah's death Mary's will basically divided the estate 50/50 between 2 daughters with a small amount for each grandchild eg £5-10k

Since Sarah's death, Mary has made changes. 50% will now go to Jane, the remaining 50% will be divided equally between the grandchildren. Sarah's husband will also like get something too.

Sarah's children have somehow found out about this (not sure how) and aren't happy. They feel like they're not being treated fairly as the original 50% for Sarah is no longer coming to that part of the family, but a smaller share, while Jane still gets 50%.

Jane will be using her share as an extra pension as she's not got a great one. Sarah would have likely done the same so these sums were never going to be passed directly to grandchildren but obviously they would benefit indirectly.

Obviously Mary can do what she likes with her money but this is causing friction and interested in perspectives. Inheritance seems to always cause feuds.

OP posts:
socks1107 · 19/04/2026 18:28

She could leave all of it to her remaining daughter. Arguing over an inheritance is awful, but doing it whilst the person is still alive is grabby. She can leave her money to whoever she wants and in any percentage

Barrenfieldoffucks · 19/04/2026 18:26

Yeah, I get why they'd be pissed off. What is the logic behind effectively discounting Sarah?

Comedycook · 19/04/2026 18:24

My mother died before my grandmother. My grandmothers will saw her estate split between her three children equally. As my mother was dead, her share was divided between me and my sister. I lost track of who's who in your op ..but I believe what happened in my situation was the correct thing to do

Dimms · 19/04/2026 18:24

Arguing over an inheritance when the person isn’t even dead is so grubby.

Thehop · 19/04/2026 18:24

It's not very fair but agree there's not much to be done

Northermcharn · 19/04/2026 18:22

It sounds like a sensible change to me. More importantly, it was her wishes for her money. The grown up GKs should be happy / feel lucky that they're getting any inheritance at all, really.

Jopo12 · 19/04/2026 18:22

It doesn't strike me as very fair, but there is very little that can be done without causing further rifts.

What do you think should happen and do you have any influence with Mary?

Figcherry · 19/04/2026 18:22

So Jane's dc are getting half of what Sarah's inheritance would have been?
And Sarah's dc only get 25% between them.
That's not cool.