To be worried about sex drugs I found

I know this sort of an aside and not addressing your main problem. You say you can't use something like Ovestin because of the hormone cancer link but have you considered Replens? It is a vaginal "moisturiser" which you insert every couple of days - it is not hormone based but some women find it makes things much more comfortable. I am allergic to almost everything and I have no problems with using it.

Viagra. No big deal
lots of men suffer with ED from time to time

This was my first thought too. He may not want to add to your anxiety so takes them before initiating. If this is the case, he will be heartbroken that in finding them this has caused you so much worry. He may feel embarrassed so I’d advise to approach it calmly and with curiosity. Everything will be ok.x

I hope said 'friends' have since been binned off, who needs enemies eh!

Hugs OP, think it's good you came on to talk it all through x

This ^

dangerously LOW blood pressure is the problem from a heart attack point of view

If you buy Viagra over the counter you will have an interview with the pharmacist they can do this sort of thing nowadays no need for a GP. When you purchase over the internet from someone like Boots there is an online questionaire that is reviewed by a HCP. Clearly if you decide to lie to them that is at your own risk.

AFAIK the tadafil diverts blood supply to where it is needed. If you are taking blood pressure medication it reduces your blood pressure. Taking both is a problem in some people. One of the side effects of blood pressure drugs is ED. Read the Package Insert Leaflet or look at the British National Formulary bnf.nice.org.uk/

i'm glad he reassured you. All is well.

Cialis?

Well done @TellmeImwrongnow
I'm glad you've asked your husband and that he's reassured you.

It can be dangerous for someone with heart trouble, yes.

They were in "1 brown cardboard delivery box with a 6 boxes of drugs in it", so most likely bought over the internet.

Just for extra reassurance @TellmeImwrongnow, erectile drugs of many generic types are available over the counter at UK pharmacies, so he may well have bought them at your local Lloyds or Boots rather than the internet. Reading your earlier posts I was going to recommend a straight ask, I see you did that, glad you had the expected (by me) outcome.

Sometimes, things are exactly as they are!

gl.ad all is well he still shouldnt buy stuff off the internet whilst hes on other medication without checking with a doctor for his own well being

Reading your earlier posts, first thought: prostitutes, on the boys' weekends.

You say no-one would be interested in this group of middleaged men - prostitutes.

Even after your update, where he sounds like a kind man who would not want to hurt your feelings and clearly cares about you very much - prostitutes.

OP, I feel like your original find didn't have the hallmarks of someone playing away, and his explanation doesn't either, I think you did the right thing by talking it through. I hope this puts your mind at rest and you can carry on using them or not as required!

@TellmeImwrongnow
tadalafil can be safely used by men with hypertension and other heart conditions, obviously depends on the condition(s) and other medication (it can be used alongside a number of antihypertensive medications safely too). Tadalafil can be taken every day routinely or “as required”. I would be concerned if he not had it prescribed for him, as no assessment regarding contra-indications will have been done. However, is it possible that he has been to an online prescribing pharmacy or doctor? It’s not uncommon that men don’t want to admit to ED to their GP, so use online or private services.

i can imagine a number of scenarios thst are innocent- e.g. he’s embarrassed to say re ED and so has not said anything. Maybe he’s worried you’ll feel it’s a reflection on your attractiveness if he can’t get or maintain an erection, and this might further dent your already very low sex drive and so has tried to hide it (he might not need it all the time). He could use it to masturbate. Some men experience ED once, feel so embarrassed or upset that they worry and it becomes a self-defeating circle- in such cases, sometimes knowing it is there “just in case” gives them reassurance that they could have it if they need it and this helps.

If he’s only used 8-10 tablets over a several year period (if I’m right re timeline from being bought to now), it would seem less likely to be the case that he’s been running off to have sex with someone else every opportunity he gets.

I think you have to ask him about the pills. Just explain how you found them and ask him about why he has them. I’d guess after 20 years, you know him well enough to gauge a reaction- but I’d try not to be too accusatory from the off, if I were you. If there is an innocent explanation I think he deserves an opportunity to give it without being accused of all sorts of things ranging from an affair to use of prostitutes (not saying you’ve suggested the latter- but can you imagine how hurtful it would be if the issue is genuinely ED and you accuse him of not only infidelity but use of prostitutes? I’m not sure that’d be something easily forgiven, tbh). Sure. You can give him a hard time if he has been up to no good- but without more to go on than this I would not go in all guns blazing.

Similarly, I would not be keen to go snooping and invading his privacy as my first action. If you trust him so little that this is your first step -and feel you can’t tell if he’s lying to your face- then your relationship is in real trouble to break down of trust and poor communication.

Ad I said, I think you calmly talk to him- state what you found and that you found it when tidying, which has got you worried about both how safe it is for him to use, but also wondering why he feels the need to have them.