To ponder legal action for being slapped on the arse

Anyone else wish men would man up and call out sexist behaviour.

I take it that is aimed at me?

Do you ever have a gut feeling about something?

If he seemed genuinely remorseful, embarrassed, mortified? If in my gut I thought he was genuinely sorry, just an absolute knob and not some kind of sexual predator. I would still want him dealt with but I would be unlikely to go down the legal route.

If that answer is not satisfactory then that's on you not me. I look forward to seeing a post where you are telling an OP to "trust her gut"

Did you miss the bit where he did it before to someone else and “sincerely” apologised for it?

Yes, I was being facetious. We know you did not forget to answer the question; it’s completely transparent that you were unable to give a satisfactory answer to the question.

Because I doubt anything will come of it if she does.

Yes but I mean they’d have no doubt or hesitation about taking it further afterwards. Loudly.

One day he going to mess with the wrong woman and the company that hired him is going to be in big trouble reputationally - because they knew.

This is why a written record, even just an emailed summary of your chat, is so important. They cannot say they didn’t know, or that no-one has complained.

JFC, still pushing your pathetic nonsense on this thread? Why are you so keen to discourage a woman from reporting a sex crime?

Sadly you are mistaken. If you read the full thread you will see multiple posters have spoken about not wanting to ruin this man's job, his marriage, his reputation or his life.

I know. I'd feel the same as you. You've given away a lot of details about yourself here. Particularly the company you work for, though. I think maybe you should consider this.
I'll just say I really do think this guy should be reprimanded in some way and leave it at that.

Can you imagine the reaction from a 20-30yo woman experiencing this? They’d go ballistic.

Honestly I think you have to be 45+ to have any notion of this sort of behaviour ever having been considered ‘humorous’, or casual sexual assault being in any way normal. Older to remember it happening in the workplace.

I’m in that older age group and really, I see this as the sort of shit that used to happen in the 1960s-70s but died out in the 80s, so long before I entered the workplace. The perpetrators now retired.

I would always have gone ballistic. I do understand the shock and paralysis and business concerns and I haven’t been self-employed but it wouldn’t have occurred to me not to complain loudly (possibly to my detriment). I feel like I’m reading a thread from forty years ago.

I’m not trying to undermine the reality of your shitty experience. I am saying that the people involved are absolutely deluded if they imagine they can carry on sweeping this sort of shit under the carpet. Younger women won’t let them - and THEY are woefully, knowingly failing to protect all women.

I did not "forget" to answer the question. Why should I engage further if someone has to quote me on one word but choose to ignore how I made it clear this is not acceptable and something needs to be done, but hey who cares about the truth if it doesn't fit the narrative.

How can you write that you're not taking further action and go to the police, though?
If you do get the police involved, then you have put it in writing you're not taking further action so it could be seen as you flip-flopping. In the - imo highly, highly unlikely- event this goes to trial and that won't look good at all.

I don't get this 'quiet word' stuff, either.
If you get the police involved, they're obliged to look into it.

You must think really hard if you're going to get the police involved.

Why are you so worried about this poor man and his big job?

I am so sorry this happened to you— it’s horrible.

He has repeatedly committed a criminal offence and he doesn’t seem to think the law applies to him. His actions do seem to have been tolerated every single time — I have little to no doubt that he knows it’s wrong but experience has taught him he’ll get away with it.

It is assault and it’s a criminal offence for a good reason — it violates and traumatises — your feelings testify to that.

Age is not an excuse for breaking the law. Many serial rapists and killers would be walking the streets if their age allowed them to evade prosecution.

Only you can decide what you want to do in terms of legal action. But this guy gets away with it and will continue to do because too many people don’t treat his actions with the seriousness that they deserve.

Dignity Ltd lol. No dignity was shown to anyone that day.

I don't think anyone here is concerned about his career. There is only concern for the OP and her reputation in a very male dominated sexist industry.

It's very easy for people to be warriors behind a keyboard. Op you should go as far as you feel comfortable doing.

Look, speak to the police. At the very least he needs an embarrassing ‘talking to’ - sadly by other men as they’re the only ones he will have a modicum of respect for. Otherwise who will it be next time? Your daughter? Your friend?

The threat you can, and should weald IMO, is by reputation.

You are well within your rights to demand a meeting with him and the business owner of the grounds on which the incident occurred and make it cleat that, as in 2026 it is reasonable to assume that NOBODY is ignorant enough to not know that smacking the behind of another worker is in any way acceptable, that you will go ahead and assume that the action was an assault.

I would state that on this occasion you will not be taking the matter to the Police, although you are well entitled to, but that any further actions will result in you doing so.

He is a DINOSAUR! Do not be fooled into thinking you just have to put up with his shit OR forget about it now time has passed!