To be hooked and aghast at this story

Yes. This is why the money was always so outrageous, and so feast or famine, which sets a path of uncertainty and insecurity that’s can be hard to detach from.
He paid £100k for a visa you can get if you start a business in the US. He was a builder and started a construction company and it seems like it was objectively successful, but he was always spending more than he earnt.

@BreezyMintHiker Ive not read the comments on her posts, but I am now on part 10 of her story after looking her up after reading your post about it.

He invested to start a company or something - she said 100k I think? And she went on a spousal visa. I think you can stay as long as the business is solvent.

I find the big mole on her chin quite distracting. I know that makes me a terrible person, but I'm just mentioning it.

Blimey @ConverselyAttired
How do they get a visa to work in America

I identified his mother due to the information she provided on her Instagram. Then used his likely surname along with her details which took me to his full name from their wedding. It is him because obviously she appears on his SM. Nice to know that as an ex detective you never lose it 😂😂

Me too.

Oh you have identified who he is? 🤯

I don’t mean is it believable, I meant more along the lines of did it happen to her as she says it did? Thinking of the Scottish woman who claimed to be pregnant etc.

Woman meets man on dating app approx age 30. He says he lives in a posh flat in Bristol and wants marriage/kids. He says he wants to start a business in California so they get married for the Visa and move there. They have a baby.

She finds out he has one kid back in Bristol from a ONS but eventually finds out it's 2 kids in their teens. Continues to ignore all red flags such as his mum being in PRISON for stealing money which she said (as a legal defence) were for his debts.

She comes back to UK on discovery of the lies, but finds out she is pregnant with number 2 so decides to make the marriage work. However, she's put all her money into his US account and is a SAHM so financial visibility is nil. He basically gets a DUI so their Visas are revoked (meaning they cannot get back in if they leave). He blows through the money, maxes out her UK card and puts a truck in her name, gets verbally abusive with cameras round the house, then a warrant gets put out for his arrest and I am up to where they are on the run to Mexico.

Oh God, I can't face watching 17 hours of it. What's the story basically?

I was in an abusive marriage to 12 years and had two children with him. It was all emotional abuse, financial and coercive. I didn’t lose thousands like this woman as I didn’t have that. But I was always the main wage earner and I wasn’t really in control if it. We were in quite a bit of debt, nothing like gambling, just him constantly wanting to redecorate/renovate etc.

Now in my mid 40s I can see blatant red flags. But I was mid 20s when I met him, and lots of therapy has shown me why I let those slide. I stayed for a long time, had a second child and tried to make it work. I felt a lot of shame about having made a mistake. I had a very desperate need to feel loved that I hadn’t addressed in y younger years.

I wouldn’t put up with that sort of stuff now, but often abuse is slow to build and things in women’s past make them less likely to spot red flags or ignore them.

How is everyone managing to find him? I thought I was up to date on the comments etc

I don’t think there’s anything which indicates it isn’t true. She’s now finished tge story and and is back in England. Having worked in DV for a number of years there’s nothing which indicates it’s not true including her ignoring tge numerous red flags along the way.

Having managed to identify him and looked at his SM they clearly had a nice life in the US but definitely a bit of a ‘lad’. He even states his own parents described him as a ‘problem child’ so there’s probably loads more red flags she choose to ignore but she does seem very naive about a lot of things. Hopefully less so now.

well only she can answer that but I know on TikTok there are plenty of DV experts- police and charity/ support workers saying not only is it completely believable, it’s textbook abuse.

i mean what is unbelievable about it? The only unusual part really is moving to California, but people like him do things like that.

I’ve only watched a couple of the first videos so I’m just asking honestly - is it all definitely true?

I thought it was sus that she married him without telling anyone.

I agree that it’s pure stupidity.

Sorry, when I say "it" I meant the house deposit inheritance he said he was keeping to one side for her, not the house sale money.

The error she made was not putting it into an account that was joint access - she said they hadn't sorted out a joint account "yet" so the intention was there eventually to do so. I hope it makes someone watching the videos think again about that.

She was married to him. He lost/ spent huge amounts of money- hundreds and hundreds of thousands of pounds, it seems.

but it’s hard to argue that ie the sale of her house proceeds going into the martial pot isn’t completely usual- she wasnt working / paying any bills so when he couldn’t pay for things wha else could she do?
Let them get evicted rather than dip into ger savings? It’s all normal behaviour from her point of view . he was the abusive one

I have people in my life that I worry cpuld get into situations like this. Some people are just blind when it comes to relationships.