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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask to do some washing?

68 replies

flowersandfuckinghearts · 10/04/2026 00:07

Some perspective needed please - a close family member lives in a different country so we’ve come to visit for a week.

We asked today if we could pop a wash on as we’re running out of clothes, only to be told we’re taking advantage and no we can’t pop a wash on.

No problem at all - I’ll go to the launderette down the street then. They then get arsey as we’ve made them feel bad AIBU?

OP posts:
cocog · 10/04/2026 10:51

I would book early flights and go home early spend the rest of your holiday doing things you like. And not go back ever!

Itiswhysofew · 10/04/2026 10:51

What a dreadful attitude they have. I couldn't imagine refusing anyone that, even a neighbour.

Don't put yoursel out for them again.

Legolaslady · 10/04/2026 10:49

I would leave
I'm not joking
That's really bizarrely tight and mean

Bunnybackinherwarren · 10/04/2026 10:47

I'd be packing my stuff and finding somewhere else to stay... You obviously aren't really welcome.

toomuchfaff · 10/04/2026 08:58

Id go do the washing at the launderette, are you in the position to ho to an Airbnb for the remainder of your time, itd be the mic drop to say something along the lines - as you think we're taking advantage of you by being here, weve organised accomodation, we will be off now and leave you alone you miserable git. Happy days!

takealettermsjones · 10/04/2026 00:33

Taking advantage? And then being arsey when you say you'll go to a launderette instead?! They are batshit.

Original poster
flowersandfuckinghearts · 10/04/2026 00:32

LassiKopiano24 · 10/04/2026 00:27

You’re not being unreasonable at all, I have stayed with family plenty of times and they always offer to pop some bits in the wash whenever I need, I also offer when I have guests.

No, we won’t be coming back. If we ever come back then it’ll be a hotel or AirBnB somewhere close. It’s really soured the whole week actually.

OP posts:
Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 10/04/2026 00:32

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 10/04/2026 00:20

Wow!

That's horrible of them.

I'd go to the launderette, subtly break their washing machine without them knowing (take the fuse out of the plug) and never visit the miserable cunts ever again.

They'll have to pay for someone to fix it after you've gone home. Revenge is a dish best served cold.

Omg. Please do this OP! And smile sweetly, faux sympathetic words when they mention it probably after you’ve left.

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 10/04/2026 00:30

LassiKopiano24 · 10/04/2026 00:27

You’re not being unreasonable at all, I have stayed with family plenty of times and they always offer to pop some bits in the wash whenever I need, I also offer when I have guests.

Most sane and normal people do this. It’s called being a good host.

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 10/04/2026 00:30

Very rude. I’d probably do the British thing of smiling and saying nothing through gritted teeth 😬 or I’d go apeshit at them, no scrap that, just a bit of sarcasm.

You’re not going back there again are you?

LassiKopiano24 · 10/04/2026 00:27

You’re not being unreasonable at all, I have stayed with family plenty of times and they always offer to pop some bits in the wash whenever I need, I also offer when I have guests.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 10/04/2026 00:24

That is the definition of tight when you have travelled to visit them YANBU.

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 10/04/2026 00:20

Wow!

That's horrible of them.

I'd go to the launderette, subtly break their washing machine without them knowing (take the fuse out of the plug) and never visit the miserable cunts ever again.

They'll have to pay for someone to fix it after you've gone home. Revenge is a dish best served cold.

Original poster
flowersandfuckinghearts · 10/04/2026 00:17

OchonAgusOchonOh · 10/04/2026 00:12

That’s a very odd reaction.

Did they invite you to stay or did you invite yourselves? Maybe if you invited yourselves they’re annoyed about that? Otherwise I can’t think why they would react like that to a perfectly reasonable request.

That said, unless you have small dc, I can’t imagine needing to do a wash on a one week holiday.

We have children with us, yes. We only came with hand luggage to keep costs down (which they knew)

OP posts:
Original poster
flowersandfuckinghearts · 10/04/2026 00:15

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 10/04/2026 00:11

‘Taking advantage’
so you’re allowed a bed, water, heating, electricity, I asssume they provide lots of food too, but laundry powder and a bit of energy is where they draw the line?! Madness.

This is the thing, we’ve bought our own food and help with dinner/cleaning up and we were going to do the wash ourselves then hang it out. No involvement from them needed.
It made me feel like I was really taking the piss - we were invited out here too and have used valuable holiday time to come as well.

OP posts:
OchonAgusOchonOh · 10/04/2026 00:12

That’s a very odd reaction.

Did they invite you to stay or did you invite yourselves? Maybe if you invited yourselves they’re annoyed about that? Otherwise I can’t think why they would react like that to a perfectly reasonable request.

That said, unless you have small dc, I can’t imagine needing to do a wash on a one week holiday.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 10/04/2026 00:11

‘Taking advantage’
so you’re allowed a bed, water, heating, electricity, I asssume they provide lots of food too, but laundry powder and a bit of energy is where they draw the line?! Madness.

Eenameenadeeka · 10/04/2026 00:07

Not at all unreasonable. Perfectly normal to use a family members laundry when staying.

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