Being fat stopping me from being happy

I’ve never eaten so healthily and my hair looks fantastic.

Do you eat loads of sugar/snacks as you're knackered? I think it might be worth getting some bloods done at the GP if you're so exhausted. As you sound like when I was severely iron deficient and anaemic. I had to eat something every 2 hours to keep going and piled on weight. When I dealt with the iron deficiency I didn't need to eat so frequently for energy boosts and it seemed to have helped with cravings. You want a ferritin over 30 minimum, so clarify your result even if they say it's "satisfactory".

Sleep deprivation is awful though and won't be helping, what's the usual wake for? Have you considered sleep training? As your current situation of broken sleep is not sustainable with those work hours and a partner who isn't the best

Your weight is completely unrelated to the 50 hours of work your doing and your sleep deprivation due to your toddler.

Oh gosh, I have been there and have the (oversized!) t-shirt. Your post was so relatable to me. I’ve struggled with food and being overweight all my life. All I wanted to do was hide away from the world. My confidence was on the floor.

Mounjaro saved me. Please don’t rule it out. I have lost 6 stone slowly and sensibly. Mounjaro doesn’t melt away the fat on its own; you have to put the work in! I have completely overhauled how I eat.
Only downside is that I’m now spending a lot on clothes. Thank goodness for Vinted! I absolutely love myself now.
Best of luck.

You sound burnt out and exhausted - and one of the consequences of that can be weight gain & tired looking skin. I feel you - I certainly felt fat at a size 14. Some people can look great at that size, but I didn't. I then crept up to a size 16, and I felt the same way you did.

You need more time to rest - sleep & stress have a huge impact on weight gain. Please talk to your DH about stepping up more to give you a break - he needs to know how unhappy you are, and how this is affecting your life.

I'm not necessarily recommending them to you - but WLI have changed my life. I haven't had any hair loss, or any serious side effects, I just feel amazing. I've been on them for the past 11 months and it's made it very easy for me to lose the weight I had been carrying for over 10 years. If you don't have the time to dedicate to diet and exercise, can afford them, and the weight is making you miserable, it may be an answer.

Mounjaro worked for me. I know how people feel about WLI, but working the same sort of hours you do and after years and years of dieting, exercise etc I just wanted to stop thinking about it all 24/7.

You have 2 years of sleep deprivation and are working long hours. I do understand that, after a lifetime of being slim, it’s hard to
get used to a new body but, right now, it’s the body you have.

you need to be kinder to yourself, you work long hours and have a toddler to look after. I work 37.5 hours a week and my youngest is 17 and I still struggle to find the energy to exercise!

can you go for a walk at lunchtime? Not for the exercise or to lose weight but simply for the well being benefits of getting away from your desk.

Can dh step up more? Can he do some of the night time awakenings? Have you spoken to him about how the weight gain makes you feel?

honestly at 5ft 7 size 14 is still fairly slim but I do understand that you’re used to being very slim.

I voted you are unreasonable because you feel worthless and unlovable and nobody should feel like they ❤️

@SunFunGin48392
be kind to yourself here

14-16 is the UK average and out
bodies all Change after having kids and being so busy we sometimes grab convenience items rather than peeling tonnes of vegetables.

Try and relax this weekend - everything is always worse when we are exhausted.

Can you work less than 50 hours? It's 10 hours a day. You carry a lot with work, housework and a young child.
You need a bit of time if you are to commit to diet and exercise I think.

Don't be tempted by WLI, as suggested, it won't do anything nutritionally and you'll add hair loss into the mix.

I'm sorry you feel shit. Exercise is nothing to do with it. You've gotta exercise for a bloody long time to work off anything.

what eating habits have you got into that you know are unhealthy?

You need to look at food as nourishment for your body. You don't need to exercise for things to get better. Being sleep deprived massively impacts us. I don't eat perfectly, but I'm doing things like adding nuts and seeds to my weetabix, having tuna and salad, adding veg and beans/pulses were I can. Think about were you might be nutritionally low and look into supplements. Do you have a skincare routine?

Firstly, size 14 is not huge but I get it if you're not happy this size. Don't be so hard on yourself , your life sounds exhausting. Have you considered weight loss meds to get you closer to the weight you want to be? Might inspire you to start exercising again. Having said that if you're completely wrecked all the time and skin looking bad might it be worth a GP appointment to check checked out?

You’re being really hard on yourself- you are a busy Mum with no time to do some of the things you want. Actually, size 14 isn’t fat at all- you’re just bigger than you want to be. I’m sure you look fine. Concentrate on getting the rest you need and getting support so you can exercise sometimes. I’m sure you will soon start to feel better. It’s a big change you have been through so give yourself a break!