Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Child given money by "Vicar" at school

812 replies

TakeALookAtTheseSwatches · 03/04/2026 20:51

So my 10 year old daughter (year 5) came home from school on Thursday and told us the Vicar (possibly just a trainee, I'm not entirely sure) who was taking their collective worship at school gave her £5 to "get herself an Easter treat" and that it was "just between me and you" I asked her if she told the teacher and she said no. I feel quite uneasy about this, should I say something to the school?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Thedogscollar · 22/04/2026 17:45

An adult should never ask a child to keep a secret.
Please report as this is classic grooming behaviour.

TheBeaTgoeson1 · 22/04/2026 16:14

This is like the teacher bought a Lego set thread 🤣

nam3c4ang3 · 22/04/2026 15:27

OhWise1 · 22/04/2026 14:42

No
Noone is worried because the kid's story is a fairytale!

Show quote history

What the kid made the whole thing up?! Or the mum made the whole thing up?!

OhWise1 · 22/04/2026 14:42

Reallyneedsaholiday · 22/04/2026 12:36

Noone is worried about "this child", because "this child" ignored the instruction not to tell anyone, and told her parent. People ARE worried that if there was any nefarious intention behind the gift, that "this child" will not be the only one targeted, and those children may not have told anyone, and could very well be in imminent danger. It should have been reported to the relevant authorities immediately.

Show quote history

No
Noone is worried because the kid's story is a fairytale!

bridgetreilly · 22/04/2026 13:31

TakeALookAtTheseSwatches · 15/04/2026 09:27

I can't give an update if there is no update yet 🙄

And is there still no update?

LauraJaneGrace · 22/04/2026 12:56

Reallyneedsaholiday · 22/04/2026 12:36

Noone is worried about "this child", because "this child" ignored the instruction not to tell anyone, and told her parent. People ARE worried that if there was any nefarious intention behind the gift, that "this child" will not be the only one targeted, and those children may not have told anyone, and could very well be in imminent danger. It should have been reported to the relevant authorities immediately.

Show quote history

Well, absolutely no update after so much discussion about children in danger and the necessary contacting of all of the " relevant authorities" so I would imagine the actual situation wasn't exactly as described in the first place.

Reallyneedsaholiday · 22/04/2026 12:36

OhWise1 · 21/04/2026 13:43

Yes. I will grant you if tge school burns down or the roof falls in🙄
This os not an urgent matter l-this child is not in imminent danger. If she were then police and SS would have been cobtacted. The school cannot investigate things (assuming this girls story even stacks up as being possible) because there is nobody working and no pupils attending to question about the incident.
Given thw girl's story changing, the witness denying it and the implausability of it all plus the

Noone is worried about "this child", because "this child" ignored the instruction not to tell anyone, and told her parent. People ARE worried that if there was any nefarious intention behind the gift, that "this child" will not be the only one targeted, and those children may not have told anyone, and could very well be in imminent danger. It should have been reported to the relevant authorities immediately.

Whatsappweirdo · 22/04/2026 09:45

Hope all is ok…

MadeInGrimsby · 21/04/2026 14:17

scoobysnaxx · 21/04/2026 14:14

It is bad. I regularly confer with school safeguarding leads and social services during holiday periods.

Show quote history

Yes, you will do. I'm not on the Safeguarding Team, but I know they do regularly.

scoobysnaxx · 21/04/2026 14:14

MadeInGrimsby · 21/04/2026 13:58

It's pretty bad. I've never known a school to have such a poor system, but I've never worked in Primary. Perhaps Secondary schools with more students and more issues focus on this more.

Edited
Show quote history

It is bad. I regularly confer with school safeguarding leads and social services during holiday periods.

MadeInGrimsby · 21/04/2026 13:59

Reallyneedsaholiday · 21/04/2026 12:56

I'm very concerned about the OPs reporting and response levels.

Show quote history

Quite.

MadeInGrimsby · 21/04/2026 13:58

scoobysnaxx · 21/04/2026 13:23

This is shocking! Surely the safeguarding lead is contactable in school holidays? Are they back from Easter now?

It's pretty bad. I've never known a school to have such a poor system, but I've never worked in Primary. Perhaps Secondary schools with more students and more issues focus on this more.

MadeInGrimsby · 21/04/2026 13:55

Flushitdown · 21/04/2026 13:10

It's the school holidays. They generally don't monitor emails in the holidays. If there was an emergency then the appropriate authorities will have contact details for relevant staff. Email is not an appropriate contact method for such emergencies. In this case, the police would be able to contact the head/ safeguarding lead if needed.

Show quote history

Yes, I know it's the school holidays.
Schools are supposed to be monitoring emails - yes, over the holidays too - especially safeguarding.
I know that I'm in a large secondary school, but our Safeguarding Team have a rota for safeguarding concerns, even on holidays!
The SLT have a rota for other concerns, even when the school is closed! I've picked up concerns on Saturday morning, and on Bank Holidays.
This school having no response to this point is poor.

OhWise1 · 21/04/2026 13:43

Yes. I will grant you if tge school burns down or the roof falls in🙄
This os not an urgent matter l-this child is not in imminent danger. If she were then police and SS would have been cobtacted. The school cannot investigate things (assuming this girls story even stacks up as being possible) because there is nobody working and no pupils attending to question about the incident.
Given thw girl's story changing, the witness denying it and the implausability of it all plus the

Flushitdown · 21/04/2026 13:27

scoobysnaxx · 21/04/2026 13:23

This is shocking! Surely the safeguarding lead is contactable in school holidays? Are they back from Easter now?

The school safeguarding lead is not a statutory service (yes a statutory role in school, but not a statutory service) so don't need to be continually contactable. The LADO, children's safeguarding and the police do need to be continually contactable (and are) and one of those should have been notified.

scoobysnaxx · 21/04/2026 13:23

This is shocking! Surely the safeguarding lead is contactable in school holidays? Are they back from Easter now?

OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon · 21/04/2026 13:17

Our local school only went back today, yesterday was an inset day and every member of staff paid to work yesterday was on a training course at a different venue.
So if it had been our local school the email would only be seen today.

So...hopefully the Op @TakeALookAtTheseSwatches will update this thread at the end of the school day...

Flushitdown · 21/04/2026 13:10

MadeInGrimsby · 21/04/2026 07:42

The incident happened on the 2nd April. It's now the 21st, so I'd be inclined to be very concerned about the school's reporting and response levels.

It's the school holidays. They generally don't monitor emails in the holidays. If there was an emergency then the appropriate authorities will have contact details for relevant staff. Email is not an appropriate contact method for such emergencies. In this case, the police would be able to contact the head/ safeguarding lead if needed.

Flushitdown · 21/04/2026 13:08

DotAndCarryOne2 · 15/04/2026 18:42

Because the first point of contact is the school.

Show quote history

It shouldn't be when the school is closed! This is a serious allegation which needs urgent investigation by appropriate authorities. School would be first point of contact in term time but not in the holidays.

Reallyneedsaholiday · 21/04/2026 12:56

MadeInGrimsby · 21/04/2026 07:42

The incident happened on the 2nd April. It's now the 21st, so I'd be inclined to be very concerned about the school's reporting and response levels.

I'm very concerned about the OPs reporting and response levels.

MadeInGrimsby · 21/04/2026 07:42

The incident happened on the 2nd April. It's now the 21st, so I'd be inclined to be very concerned about the school's reporting and response levels.

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 21/04/2026 07:38

The suspense is killing me. Not really!

GoodWater · 21/04/2026 04:08

Any update @TakeALookAtTheseSwatches ?

LauraJaneGrace · 20/04/2026 13:46

Reallyneedsaholiday · 19/04/2026 17:04

Hallelujah! One more day to go for an update 😂

I hope so.
Very curious about this.

Reallyneedsaholiday · 19/04/2026 17:04

Hallelujah! One more day to go for an update 😂