Child given money by "Vicar" at school

I think so. They've obviously not tracked down the vicar as the schools are currently off.

This thread is just getting silly.
It's been running 4 days and it seems no-one has been able to ascertain who this individual is.
Surely we should have had an update by now and know what action has been taken ??

I'm not really interested in getting into a never ending argument tbh

I don't have kids. Wise not to assume that everyone does

Who gives a fig whether it’s a man or a woman. Do you think women can’t be abusers. What is the point of safeguarding our children and telling them to report anything like this to us if we’re not going to believe them ?

So what - you think she should just assume that her daughter is telling lies and not take it any further until there’s evidence of abuse. Are you seriously telling me that if a child of yours came home and told you a member of the clergy had given her money and told her to keep it just between them, it wouldn’t set any alarm bells ringing ?

The OP has said that her child has been caught out telling lies before. The OP hasn't said this was a man - sure someone pointed that out earlier

I'm not sure schools have CCTV. They certainly didn't when my mum was teaching

Yes. Do you think women can’t be abusers ?

She hasn't been abused - the OP hasn't even said how often this "vicar" has contact with the kids. This vicar or whoever they are has had no contact with the child alone at any point. And - the OP doesn't yet know that her daughters story is what actually happened

Sorry what ? You’ve branded the child a liar when OP said nothing of the sort. She said she has questioned the child several times and she’s adamant that’s what happened. Also another child was a witness and it may have been caught on CCTV. If this man has nothing to hide, he has nothing to fear from an investigation does he ? If the child is telling the truth then at the very least he’s been very naive and needs a stern conversation about his behaviour.

FFS do you not recognise a red flag when you see it ? How did any of the clergy manage to get kids on their own and groom them. What do you want - evidence the child has been abused before you act ?

Sorry?

Great that she’s asking the school to investigate then? 👍

I never said she hadn't?

OP has already talked to her multiple times.

If you email the school, put SAFEGUARDING CONCERN in the subject line so it won’t get overlooked.

Apologies if this has already been said, but the way to go about this would be to contact the front door safeguarding multi agency number - photo attached for Durham. Link here: https://www.durham.gov.uk/firstcontact

A sofa. In a school hall. Right.

I don't think it's harmful to have a gentle and supportive conversation. More details may come out, during a low pressured chit chat which could be useful.

I strongly disagree with the posters who want the OP to keep questioning her daughter. This needs to be handled gently and to keep going back to the DD and questioning her is not helpful.

Yes, as pp have said upthread, it's bad practice not to have contact information for one of the Safeguarding Team.

The child is at home with their parents and the school is closed.

There are childr4en out there who are being abused right now.

THEY take priority in a vastly stretched social service, and rightly so.

Going to the police at this point would be an over reaction as there isn't really evidence of grooming - the guy gave her a fiver but made no attempt to get the girl's contact details or anything like that - so it isn't grooming - yet - tho it is inappropriate behaviour and needs watching as it could become grooming if he has more access to her.

At this point it's inappropriate, unprofessional behaviour that needs flagging so the school can ensure it stops.

It's not actually an emergency as the child isn't at current risk of harm (providing OP is not taking her to any church events, and is confident the guy cannot access her on social media ).

So in a sense it doesn't matter if it isn't dealt with immediately - it's just bad practice on the part of the school, that there is no means to contact their DSL over the holidays, because in different situations there may be a more urgent need.

OP, have you got any further with finding out how to flag a safeguarding concern during the holidays?

It concerns me that the school have provided no obvious means to do that. Their duty of care for the students doesn't just stop because it's the school holidays.

I've previously been a DSL in a school myself, and it was made clear to us in training that there must be someone monitoring emails at all times, so that if someone is put of the country for example the role falls to another trained member of staff - we would work out the rota between us.

It's not that uncommon for safeguarding concerns to arise over the holidays, when families are spending more time together, children may raise things they haven't mentioned previously, etc etc. Also issues between students may arise, and so on.

You definitely need to mention it to the School. If you don't get a reply to your email I'd ask for a meeting with the Head when the school reopens & the kids return . Explain exactly what your Daughter told you, the words the 'Vicar' used & ask them to investigate why he gave her the money & why he asked her to keep it secret. It might all be innocent on his part him thinking he's doing something nice & not wanting other kids to feel left out so asked her not to say anything, however, this is classic grooming behaviour & needs challenging to be sure of his intentions. Praise you Daughter for telling you & explain why you're contacting the school, not because she's done anything wrong in accepting the money or telling you, it's to safeguard her & other kids.