AIBU to feel harassed by charity chuggers targeting women in public?

If you have the confidence, here are a few suggestions if you're actually stopped:

1: Say you're not allowed to talk to strangers/aren't allowed to talk to a member of the opposite sex unless your chaperone is present.

2: Tell them you don't agree with the cause the charity is raising money for - they can't expect you to donate money after that.

3: Something I once did is look very awkward and scared and start mumbling "I'm shy" when one engaged me in conversation. I just kept doing this and squirming and mumbling and fidgeting about and he left me alone.

4: Just stand there silently. Say nothing at all when they ask you questions.

5: When they get started on the topic, cut in after a while and say, "I find this subject really boring, can we talk about something fun?"

6: Tell them that you're happy to chat with them, but it will be over lunch in a restaurant and you expect them to foot the bill.

Someone has tried the don’t you care line on me - I said no, just don’t give a shit.

Or if they try flattery, the last one was hey lady with the beautiful scarf, I just said, it is, isn’t it, and just carried on.

I don’t tend to get stopped much. I have perfected the middle distance stare. I perfected it to break up men hogging pavements expecting women to give way. They suddenly clock I am not going to shift aside and they scatter. But it also works on chuggers.

If I do get intercepted again, I am going to tell them Sorry, I don’t speak English in my very English voice.

I’m not entirely sure that they do hone in on the most vulnerable. My DH is always targeted. I sometimes am. My sister, a wheelchair user, could practically roll along beside them shouting: “Yoohoo, down here!” and would be ignored.

If you avoid eye-contact, they tend to go for the person behind you.

Did anyone watch the recent Last One Laughing series. All the comics were asked to think about what their pet peeve was. Alan Carr said chuggers, or as he liked to call them, chunts. All the other comics including the normally unbreakable Bob Mortimer had to walk away from him because they were trying to hold in laughter.

The son of someone I used to work with was a ‘chugger’ a few years ago whilst at uni.

He said his team leader told the men and women to target older women as they were more likely to be sympathetic, but told the young women to also target older men where possible, as older men like to be approached by younger women. The women were told that ‘flirting’ could help, especially with ‘unattractive men’. 🤢🤮

He left after a few days and said it the worst job he’d ever had.

The last time a chugger stopped me, I told him I wasn't allowed to talk to strangers.

More people should try that line - after all, a lot of us were warned about Stranger Danger when we were younger.

I honestly don’t understand how they ever get any sign ups.

they’re outside the tube station where I work and everyone is in a hurry either to get to work or to get home. I actually swerve them outside the tube and there are always about 3-4 of them. Awful.

I’d love to hear from anyone who’s actually given money or signed up with one of these people.

@ToKittyornottoKitty

From what the OP said, it sounds like the chugger made a snarky comment first and she gave him the finger in response to his rudeness.

Charity donations aren't an obligation, so if chuggers are making rude comments when someone chooses to walk past them, that's totally out of line and very unprofessional.

It is enough if you don’t stick around for a chat…
no thanks and keep walking!

They say to me "You look friendly" I say I'm really not and walk off. Or I'm in a rush to get kids.

I'm going to try the already have a dd with them. Although I feel why should we lie to get rid of these nuisances - a polite no thank you should be enough!

My foolproof way of getting rid of them:
Tell them that you already have a Direct Debit with them.

Infallible!

They knock on doors here but don't give you enough time to answer. If I do answer, I give my standard reply (see pp) and nothing else.

I’m not British, despite living here for 20 years, so I often just say “I don’t live here” or “I’m a foreigner” in my North American accent. Sometimes, if I feel like it, I’ll say “I don’t speak English” in French. Both work!

Try “I’ve already donated”.

I understand they're doing a job but I got so pissed off when one of them tried to stop me and I said I really can't as I'm going to be late for my bus. Wasn't even a lie. Well he then shouted at me that I'm obviously a terrible person who doesn't give a shit about the poor little deaf children. Now obviously I'm not going to let some jumped up little twat like that think that kinda shit is in any way ok. I turned around and laughed in his face while saying well that's funny because deaf charities are the kind I do send money to, you know, seeing as how I've got 2 deaf parents. The look of absolute shock on his face, priceless 😁

In my experience the male chuggers absolutely do target women and young girls more. They are a pest in my local (to work) shopping centre. Despite not making eye contact and saying 'no, thank you' loudly to them, they walk alongside me trying to reel me in. 'Oh you've got such lovely hair', 'I love your shoes' 'Surely you can stop and listen' etc etc etc This isn't just one charity - last summer there were four different ones in various places on different days.

My 20 year old daughter and her friends have the same experience both at Uni and when back home in our hometown shopping centre.

I complained about a couple of them directly to the charities last year. When the sun is out they are worse than wasps.

My husband is the one who gets trapped.

If I spot a badge as I open the door I immediately shut it whilst saying no.

He lets them finish their sentences and everything. Far too nice, bless him, but I don't think it's nice to not let them know that their job is exploiting them first and foremost. He actually did this job for three days (paid about £12 in total after expenses).

I think the kind thing would be to tell them to get another job if they can.

I dislike them too but I long learned not to allow myself to get irritated by the guilt trip of "don't you care about XYZ", the answer is "no" so they leave me alone. I'm comfortable with my charitable endeavours and don't need to prove it to a stranger.

if they try and engage me in conversation I just say I’m already donating to charity, and keep on walking!

I don't think they particularly target women but they are definitely the worst. Tbh I'm surprised they actually get anyone signing up because everyone seems to hate them and try to avoid them.

My DH always asks them for a leaflet so he can look into it later but of course they never have them because they want to sign you up there and then and get you on their commission list.

I have no idea if they target women more than men as I don't stop for them so I'm not around long enough to notice either way. Bright and breezy "no thank you" while walking briskly by.
Sorry that amount of alliteration was not on purpose!

One got me last year, by sheer flattery - "Wow, you're quite ripped for an older guy" 😂 I didn't sign up for monthly donations, but I did bung a few quid into the collection tin 😂

I complained when a chugger came up to me in the co op as I was packing the items I had bought via a self service till. I was told my feedback was noted 🤣

I take the cowardly way out now when I spot them and pretend to be on a phone call. They are annoying. In the bit of central London I work in I've spotted young female chuggers approaching men in suits a lot.

It is annoying but they are doing a job so I try to remember that.

"Don't you care about poor deprived kids living on the moon?"
"No."