Vet advice… AIBU about costs.

The vet has to tell you what all the options are even if you've had other conversations before and he knows you likely won't take it. A different client might go ballistic if they had their dog put to sleep then discovered later there was a treatment option they hadn't been told about. Just because he mentions it doesn't mean you have to do it, or even that it's a "suggestion" as such, let alone a recommendation.

Do you have a suspended type bed for her? She might be feeling the benefit of the sling support.

https://www.argos.co.uk/product/5814129 for example. My 10yo, 30kg arthritic mutt is really preferring hers to the sofa these days. She has a soft pad on it for some extra warmth.

Shes lucky to have you ❤️

Tbh i saw thing recently that said its ok to let them go on a good day. And we as fur mums occasionally let them carry on too long, and almost noone feels they let them go too soon.

Not feeding and grooming are the very end stage discomfort. Im not saying youre at time yet, but for a large breed at 11 youre unfortunately getting close to that even if there was next to nothing wrong

Your vet no doubt knows how much you love your fluffball and might want to give you all the options. But dont doubt yourself you know your animal best and when its worthwhile to extend her life and keep her happy and when it would be for you to avoid letting her have some peace.

I wish you both more good times for a while yet x

Aw, 💐. I understand your dilemma very well.

We lost our DDog last year to what we believe was bowel cancer, but as she was an elderly dog we opted to treat the systems that were presenting, rather than go for invasive investigations that would probably have confirmed something we would not have treated anyway.

We knew we had about 4 - 6 weeks and we loved and spoilt her for those weeks, but fully in the knowledge that any day could be the last day. We could possibly have given her a few more days, but we have a couple of lovely photos and videos of her pottering around the garden and generally enjoying the sunshine about an hour before we took her to the vet for the final time. We walked her there and she was doing her doggy things on the way.

I wouldn't have had it any other way, and if we had gone for invasive investigations, her last few weeks would most likey have included crate recovery, and why put her through that for no reason.

Do what you think would be kindest for your DDog.

Sorry you are going through this. Dear Cat was 17.5 and literally treated like a god by me and DH. She had multiple health issues and the week before she was PTS they were still suggesting diagnostic tests costing £3.5k on my heartbroken husband. I called it in the end - would we actively treat her even if we knew what was wrong with her? No we would not. She declined massively over the next few days and ended up putting her peacefully to sleep the following week

It may be worth getting a second opinion @MyFairLady22 just to see if more can be done for her without the diagnostics . I don’t altogether trust a lot of vets ( or doctors for that matter ) as we’ve had some pretty shit experiences . I got banned from one local horse vet who wanted me to start steroids and nebulisers on our 26 yr old pony when what I wanted was a pot of ventipulmin for use in the summer . We had been using this system since she was 11 with our previous vet who retired . They basically said I was neglectful so I found a different vet who agreed with me . Pony is now 33 and last year we didn’t need the ventipulmin at all . I wouldn’t have minded but we had tried nebulisers back in the day when she was first diagnosed but she’s quite obstinate and won’t play ball .

I think vets feel they need to tread a careful line when they talk about euthanasia. Vets probably get some very strong responses when they offer it as an option, not from all owners, but some. Sometimes vets seem relieved when you suggest it before they do.

Your vet may have forgotten that they gave it as an option, so hasn't brought it up again.

Just to add i had a thread about it here at the time and got some v good advice about getting prescriptions for pets online.

Didn't say this earlier didn't have time - but wrt vets and fees ...

Just recently i had to take our eldest cat to the vet (16). She had what was very obviously a UTI, she had one about 2 years ago and we all know what the symptoms are! That time she was prescribed a simple antibiotic and got better within 2 days.

I rang and asked if we could just be prescribed the same again. It would be on her notes from back then. No - i had to bring her in to be seen. Fair enough, but a shame to stress her out so much. Sure enough, yes, they saw her and it was a UTI again. £40 consultation. BUT - would they just prescribe her the ABs again? No! They wanted to come back in later in the week, anesthetiser her !!!, do a bladder test, wait for it to culture, have me bring her back in a 3rd time to tell me the results THEN prescribe an AB. This would all cost fucking hundreds of pounds plus leave her in pain for another 10 days before starting treatment!!!!! 😳😡

I threatened to just have her put down. I said if they did not just prescribe the old tablets again i would bring her in and have her put down because she was suffering. I had to do this in tears in the phone to the practice manager.

He relented and said this time he'd just prescribe them but wasn't happy.

Guess what? I went and got them that afternoon and she was better 2 days later.

I don't trust the vets any more.

I know people are saying the vet is just giving options but it is a bit more than that (my dad was a vet so I'm not anti vets).
When a pet is a significant part of your life and emotional support (and I have a graveyard for still born kid goats and cry when they die after knowing them for 2 days if they don't make it, so well know emotional connections to animals) and you are given expensive choices to defer a decision to end their life or interventions that might prolong life, you start measuring your capacity for compassion for your loved pet against the financial cost to yourself. None of us like to think we will be ruled by the financial side when it comes to these decisions, but we are, and vets well know it. If he they come in at 20k for diagnostics then we have no choice to make because we can'tafford it. But 3k, we start thinking maybe we can get the cash, make some sacrifices, borrow, etc
But our compassion and love for our pets should be when they are living happy and healthy lives not prolonging a life well lived to find the business of veterinary practice. If vets gave ti give this information then they should be very clear of the benefits to pet health and not just vague ideas about possibke outcomes, additional costs and benefits.
We actually do cost benefit assessments for human treatments everyday in the NHS, but for some reason Vets don't do this.

@MyFairLady22 You need to always remember it's a dog life and not a human life, so sometimes you have to do what is kind.

Our previous dog (14 years ago now) had something similar where they kept collapsing, then would be OK. We had them put down as they were so confused when they came around it wasn't nice for them. They were 12. It was sad but we did what was best for the dog.

After that we got a rescue. Two months ago, at almost 11 years old, he just wasn't himself. Lethargic moments, struggling to jump up on the sofa etc... The vet found a liver tumour. We decided the stress of (risky) surgery wasn't fair on the dog, along with other potential complications, so had him put down. It was very sudden but for the best.

We still have our older dog, and again if she was ever in pain or suffering, we would make the same decision.

Sometimes you have to do what is kind for the dog even though it is not the decision you want to make.

And some of us with a sick elderly parent wish we could make those choices. We can give our pets a graceful loved gentle exit and should never be made to feel wrong in doing so.

Listen OP. I've said this before on MN a few times in case it brings comfort.

We are all going to die. It's the nature of life. We as humans know this, animals have the luxury of knowing nothing about death. A loved pet is a lucky lucky animal! They have you (OP) to give them a good life and a good death. Your final and arguably most important duty. It's OK ♥️

This is a decision there is no right answer for. I think it's wise to think about at what point you think it is wise to pts. She is 11 and I think spending ££££ is just unwise for anything save a complete cure

@MyFairLady22 we were in a similar situation but with our cat. He had hyperthyroidism which had been managed with medication for several years, but the blood tests were getting ridiculous. Our cat was getting stressed by all the needles and he was a cat who would tolerate a lot. The vet refused to prescribe any more medication without doing yet another one, bearing in mind all his previous ones had come back fine and he was good in himself. We contacted another vet who just deals with cats and he was happy to prescribe the medication without more tests, and would only do them if he or we had concerns about his health.
On another note, recently our other cat was ill and the vets she's at wanted to do a range of blood tests which were going to start at £250 when all online prices said should be under £100, and it would have been a longer wait for the results as they were being done out of house. If we wanted in house and fast results it would be more. So we contacted yet another vet, different to previous, and the bloods were done in house, results in 20 mins and was about £60 all in.
I think it's good to contact other vets, especially when the bigger ones, which ours is currently is at, have these pressures from the owners to make certain amount of money each day/week. We are planning on moving to this other vet soon, if not with this cat at least with the puppy we are hoping to get this year.

I think if your vet is happy to treat the symptoms as they are without more tests to make your dog more comfortable then I would do that, but if they are saying they will only treat if your dog has all these tests then I would probably speak to another practise and see what they say

Can you phone the specialist vet for a discussion about what potential diagnosea could be even if it means paying for a phone appointment (if that's a thing)?

It does, though, sound like you're towards the end.

An anaesthetic / sedation brings it's own risks. The potential diagnoses bring additional problems such as the costs which may be prohibitive in any case.

So that being said, it doesn't sound as though an expensive search for a diagnosis is the way to go.

Which kind of leaves you with the daily assessment of both your and her quality of life. You're both allowed to say that things have become overwhelming and that it's time to say stop when that's the way of it.

Sorry @MyFairLady22 I meant it is ridiculous that a vet would suggest it to you . Your dog looks like a very well loved girl .

I have had friends who treated their dogs when I wouldn’t have but I supported them as they thought it was best for them.

What I said to them was what I am saying to you. You know your dog better than anyone including your vet. There is no right or wrong answer in a lot of dilemmas. Once you decide what to do even if that means nothing or PTS or treatment then it is the CORRECT decision as you made it at the time with the knowledge that you had.

Shame on your vet for pressurising you. Ask yourself 'How is Ddog's quality of life today.' If it's acceptable then carry on. If not, then PTS.