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What age did you start feeling life was finally sorted?

316 replies

Justsorted · 28/03/2026 16:12

To ask…what age (if at all) did you finally feel like everything was sorted, all was in place and you had it pretty much (as much as you can I suppose) all figured out!? I’m 41 and finally just feeling that way, after a fairly tumultuous few years, and years before that of waiting for one thing to happen before I can sort the next. I finally finally feel sorted with my family, my home, my job, finances etc etc. Now I appreciate things can change at any moment but it’s the peace I feel that I’m not waiting, I’m not striving and stressing, I can just live. I didn’t think it would take this long. What about you?

OP posts:
BattyBurg · 28/03/2026 18:42

Still waiting… I’m 45 🙈

Bikergran · 28/03/2026 18:41

Never. I'm 72, and in my experience every time you think life is "sorted", some horrible event/illness happens to scatter your carefully lined-up ducks.

GreyCarpet · 28/03/2026 18:39

Nearly 52 and still waiting 🤷🏻‍♀️

youalright · 28/03/2026 18:38

I think one of the main reasons I felt settled in my 30s is because others stopped focusing on my life and I stopped caring. My whole 20s where people constantly when you going to have more kids, when you moving to a bigger house, why don't you do a uni course, when you getting married. Life felt so judged and stressful.

CoffeeCakeAndALattePlease · 28/03/2026 18:31

We’re 46 and 50 and not there yet! It’s all ok, nothing bad going on, but still lots to get sorted.

lisa7843 · 28/03/2026 18:24

@TheHouse did you find you spent a lot of time focussing on trying to prove people wrong from having children young? I know I certainly did. My mum always said to me one day your friends will be having children and you’ll be smug (not said in a harsh way!), I’m definitely at the smug stage now but am a little despondent I didnt just live for myself a bit more and exerted too much energy worrying about what people thought of me.

Disturbia81 · 28/03/2026 18:03

Definitely 40, felt the best I’ve ever felt, kids at good ages, happy in job, great love life. Know what I want and like. And it’s just got better

TheHouse · 28/03/2026 17:42

@lisa7843

Im feeling similar and I’m also 37. Kids are 16, 14 and 11. Degree, house, career ✔️.

Finally starting to breathe. But then it depends, because… teenagers 🤦‍♀️.

ScorchedEarthAdjacent · 28/03/2026 17:36

I’ll let you know

ginasevern · 28/03/2026 17:32

PumpkinPieAlibi · 28/03/2026 17:22

Can you tell me what you mean please? I'm contemplating having one in my late 30s and this is my fear.

I'm not the OP you asked but you must realise that having a child has the biggest impact on your life you can ever imagine. It affects every single aspect, every single day (and night) for decades. And obviously once they're here, there's no going back. It depends I suppose why you're wanting a child. Is it your lifetime's dream? Would you feel incomplete as a person without being a mother?

TubeScreamer · 28/03/2026 17:32

started mid 40s, but took a good 7/8 years

mindutopia · 28/03/2026 17:30

I’d say 40-42. But then I found out at 43 that I had cancer. I’m 45 now and may not live a long life, so so much for being able to enjoy the fruits of my labour. 😂

outofofficeagain · 28/03/2026 17:29
  1. Still waiting.

Had a brief moment around 30 when I thought I had, but no.

Sunnydaylightwind · 28/03/2026 17:25

I'm 52. Used to feel almost settled and sorted. Now have 2 kids at uni costing a fortune, work being done on the falling down house, worried about job security amidst massive outgoings, dad has cancer, mum will need support when he dies. Hoping to get back to settled and sorted in a few years....

PumpkinPieAlibi · 28/03/2026 17:22

Jopo12 · 28/03/2026 16:35

52 and still waiting.
I was quite happy and settled in my 30s, then I decided I wanted a kid. Big mistake!

Can you tell me what you mean please? I'm contemplating having one in my late 30s and this is my fear.

Brightbluesomething · 28/03/2026 17:21

My life has felt much calmer and happier in my 40’s. Probably because I give less fucks and don’t stress about the things I used to in my 20’s. I’ve still got goals I haven’t achieved yet but the older I get the more thankful I am.
Not sure that’s the same as having my life sorted, I don’t think I ever will because that could just be dull.

Mummyoflittledragon · 28/03/2026 17:21

Jopo12 · 28/03/2026 16:35

52 and still waiting.
I was quite happy and settled in my 30s, then I decided I wanted a kid. Big mistake!

Same except I’m 55. Things are very tumultuous atm with dd. I don’t think she’s a mistake, she was IVF, but omg!

DarkForces · 28/03/2026 17:20

During my 40s, especially the last 5 years. I'm learning my quirky mind is actually my biggest strength and to trust myself. The more I lean in the better things get. I'm so grateful for having a wonderful partner and daughter and that my parents are in good health. I have friends whose company I enjoy and a job that suits me so life is good.

Satarn · 28/03/2026 17:20

When i turned 30 lifes been blissful.

Justsorted · 28/03/2026 17:17

I suppose the feeling of settled and what that is will be different for everyone in a sense. Mine was a stable home, stable job, doing good financially and as healthy as possible. There will always be curveballs of course there will and I’m under no illusions, I’m so grateful for how things are right now and the feeling of peace that I have after years of not feeling that way, after years of thinking, “ok once “this” is done everything will be fine” it’s all very personal though I suppose yes.

OP posts:
SomeOtherUser · 28/03/2026 17:16

Early 30s when I met my husband. Sounds lame but it's true! It could flip again in the future, I'm sure. I'm in my 40s.

squashyhat · 28/03/2026 17:16

Fleetingly for about 10 years mid 40s to mid 50s. Now I am getting old and more and more things terrify me. I wish I could regain some confidence Sad

Morepositivemum · 28/03/2026 17:15

I was content until 38-41 now have relationship crap, health crap, worrying about mum, money crap, work crap. Good for you op though, it’s nice when things slot into place after everything being not so easy x

Ihad2Strokes · 28/03/2026 17:14

Hillarious · 28/03/2026 16:59

Just about getting there after retiring last year. Needing to sort out my sock drawer next, and that will take me a little further in the right direction.

🤣🤣

Ihad2Strokes · 28/03/2026 17:12

Justsorted · 28/03/2026 16:21

Life is full of its twists and turns isn’t it 😢

well, due to my chosen career my life was never settled, but it was 'ok' in my 40's when I was still able to make lots of choices & be optimistic about the future.

Due to growing up & living (as an adult) in several different countries & now the other side of the world to my aging mum I never felt settled here or where she is.

But then I had the stroke at 55 & my mum (the other side of the world) has dementia, it's very very unsettled & fuck all I can do about it.

so if you feel settled, enjoy it!! 💕 & make the most of it as life has a shitty way of throwing curve balls!