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Original poster

Do I ring him? Or sack him off?

247 replies

MissNameChage3000 · 27/03/2026 17:27

Supposed to be going on a date tonight. The man confirmed the restaurant last night (he booked the table) but didn’t specify the time. I messaged him saying let me know the plans tomorrow.

I have not heard from him all day. I messaged an hour ago asking whats the plan. He hasn’t been online for a few hours.

Shall I ring him? If we’re still going I need to start getting ready soon. (Shower makeup etc) but don’t want to come across as needy.

OP posts:
hcee19 · 28/03/2026 17:58

I know this is a very late response, as 24 hours have passed since you posted. Just wanted to say, for a first date, if he is not courteous enough to answer your messages, he isn't someone that is going to be reliable. I hope you didn't message him, & l hope you pissed him off....Goid luck for finding someone honest and decent

MyFairLady22 · 28/03/2026 17:53

Not attractive in a man, this low energy nonsense. I’d say I’d made other plans then, be strong.

Evaka · 28/03/2026 17:38

So many deranged responses on here OP. He's a low energy loser and you're absolutely right to have sacked him off. Hope you're having a nice Saturday and not too disappointed x

Langpants · 28/03/2026 17:34

OP, read your post this morning and popped back on to check in. Sorry this has happened to you. It’s his loss. I hope you find someone decent soon. Stay true to yourself. X

Langpants · 28/03/2026 17:30

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Did you actually RTFT? If you did, and still made that comment, please return to the 1950’s. Nowhere has OP come across as rude. The man she was meant to go on a date with was the rude one, and she herself has dodged a bullet. What you’re saying about OP in this situation sounds very misogynistic. Not sure anyone else reading this thread would
agree with you I’m afraid.

Chetchy · 28/03/2026 16:55

You dodged a loser.
He'll be back.
I would leave him on unread if he does try to contact you again.

CBA2RTFT · 28/03/2026 16:51

Walksspecial · 28/03/2026 16:34

The table had never been booked I would bet

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I thought that, too… he said it was booked, but not what time? He’s fibbing.

Then no apology? What a prince!

Original poster
MissNameChage3000 · 28/03/2026 16:37

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Excuse me?

OP posts:
Walksspecial · 28/03/2026 16:34

MissNameChage3000 · 28/03/2026 16:33

The table was booked for 7.
He was still at work after 8.
He didn’t even apologise.

So yeah.

No misunderstanding on my side.

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The table had never been booked I would bet

Original poster
MissNameChage3000 · 28/03/2026 16:33

Trainup · 28/03/2026 07:29

It’s not clear from this whether he was still up for meeting but had just not been in touch because of the customers? Which would mean he couldn’t have checked his phone. Sounds like you’ve thrown this away on what could have been a misunderstanding.. is there a reason you immediately think the worst?

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The table was booked for 7.
He was still at work after 8.
He didn’t even apologise.

So yeah.

No misunderstanding on my side.

OP posts:
Amira83 · 28/03/2026 16:17

When he phoned you and said he's booked a table, why didn't You ask him what time for ? I would have asked that straight away. As a man he probably doesn't even realize that he didn't give you the time

Walksspecial · 28/03/2026 16:06

EvieBB · 28/03/2026 15:03

I agree he probably wouldn't give a stuff (whether it was true or not), but I'm imagining that that is why op would've said that she was all dressed up/waiting - she probably thinks it might make him feel guilty (and that's why she thought about saying it)

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But the op didn’t say that to him.

you suggested she go back to him with a lie in an attempt to make him guilty

EvieBB · 28/03/2026 15:03

Walksspecial · 28/03/2026 13:42

Well it would be a lie for a start because the op wasn’t all dressed up and waiting.

Added to which, you are imaging that he would give a flying fig what the op thought of him, when he’s made it abundantly clear he cares so very little what she thinks of him by his actions @EvieBB

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I agree he probably wouldn't give a stuff (whether it was true or not), but I'm imagining that that is why op would've said that she was all dressed up/waiting - she probably thinks it might make him feel guilty (and that's why she thought about saying it)

Walksspecial · 28/03/2026 13:42

EvieBB · 28/03/2026 08:22

I'm reading her message differently
By telling him she's been dressed and ready for ages is showing him that his lack of communication/ambiguity has consequences and that she took him at his word and isn't up for playing games..... It's an attempt to make his feel really bad.....like, we made this date and look you've left me here hanging
I'm not seeing it as pathetic - more like "look what you've done you arsehole"

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Well it would be a lie for a start because the op wasn’t all dressed up and waiting.

Added to which, you are imaging that he would give a flying fig what the op thought of him, when he’s made it abundantly clear he cares so very little what she thinks of him by his actions @EvieBB

Walksspecial · 28/03/2026 13:37

I would have said - Oh that's sad I've been dressed and waiting for ages

So you would have lied @user1492757084
the op hasn’t dressed up.

AprilinPortugal · 28/03/2026 13:01

If a man likes you, you know about it! They make it obvious! It's as simple as that!

mcmooberry · 28/03/2026 12:06

Hopefully as it was yesterday you are feeling a bit better OP, totally understand the disappointment and definitely the right call to say let's leave it. He's not who you thought he was.

LiloLido · 28/03/2026 12:01

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@RealReginaPhalange I can't see what she says that was rude although I've not read every single word of her posts.

Maybe you can elaborate?

I read her first post and the updates.

I don't think she was rude, but more exasperated (and venting here) that a man should be so flaky and not set up a date properly.

Do you not see it like that?

Pedallleur · 28/03/2026 11:25

pimplebum · 28/03/2026 09:16

I disagree

until you know someone you dont know if his communication is disrespectful reg flag / how he rolls or something else

we can all have life events and
scenarios where being a poor at organising/ communicating just happen and are not a reflection of our characters

i find it shocking how many women would write this man off before hearing his explanation

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Experience tells them he was a chancer. All he he had to do was give a time and place to meet. He didn't because there probably wasn't a place. He's done, move on

Andepeda · 28/03/2026 11:12

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Meanwhile, in the real world........

RealReginaPhalange · 28/03/2026 11:03

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Grapes308 · 28/03/2026 10:48

pouletvous · 28/03/2026 09:04

Fiver says he will message again soon with something vague like “hi, how are you?”

Ha yes! I agree. I think the responses on this thread are split between those who are seasoned online daters and can recognise these type of men from a mile off, and those who have never needed to venture into the OLD world and genuinely can't see this is a typical response from a man who can't be bothered/ is ambivalent about the OP or dating in general. This has happened to me so many times I just rolled my eyes when I saw the post (towards the man, not the OP). Not one of them ever came back with a decent excuse.

FFSToEverythingSince2020 · 28/03/2026 10:32

MissNameChage3000 · 27/03/2026 21:44

Despite my MH struggles, I am sure enough of myself to know I don’t want somebody “lovably incompetent”.

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Sorry OP, but I did find this hilarious. What??? You aren’t falling down on your knees and thanking sweet baby Jesus for sending you a “lovably incompetent” man? What’s wrong with you?!?!? We should all be so lucky to have a man who is selfish AF thick as pig shit “lovably incompetent.” Because you know, men just go wife a woman who is “lovably incompetent”; oh wait, no, they don’t, because that would mean a woman who couldn’t carry the family’s mental load. That’s almost worse than a broken horse 😔 I mean, if she can’t carry the mental load, what’s the point of her, right?

LiloLido · 28/03/2026 10:30

CBA2RTFT · 28/03/2026 10:29

Eh?
Are you reading the same thread as everyone else?

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Exactly. I'm wondering what on earth that poster meant.

CBA2RTFT · 28/03/2026 10:29

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Eh?
Are you reading the same thread as everyone else?

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