Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What’s wrong with me, hospital clueless

757 replies

elm26 · 26/03/2026 15:24

Yesterday at 1pm, I put my 6 month old on the rug with his toys and went for a wee.

As I was walking back I had a sudden severe pain in my right side radiating into my lower back and up to my shoulder, I was in agony.

I called DH who was luckily only on a job 15 mins away, he came straight home and took one look at me and called ambulance, I was shouting out in pain they gave me gas and air and morphine.

I had an emergency CT when dye last night and also have a catheter as lost the ability to wee. Nothing showed on CT, they got me settled on morphine and today I’ve had a transvaginal scan which shows ovaries and womb look normal.

Gynae can’t find a reason so they’ve stopped painkillers and just giving me paracetamol but somethings wrong I feel like somebody’s twisting my insides. The gynae consultant was horrible and said the surgical team will come see me if they think it’s worth it?? So I’m waiting for that if they come.

I’m in so much pain and genuinely scared they’ll send me home not knowing what is wrong with me.

Has anyone has anything similar?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
17
Gremlins101 · 29/03/2026 08:00

Hi OP im so sorry you got discharged without any answers. I hope they find out what it is eventually and its something easily fixable.

I sometimes get extreme pain in my right side, it will start kind of where I would get a stitch and radiate up to my shoulder and arm and i would describe it as agonising... i am bent over with it. I get it nearly always from lying down but never when I go to bed. So its typical when I put the kids to bed, lie down with them and then get up again. But if I go to bed for the night, im alright.

Ive had a fairly comprehensive gyno/abdominal check with all the scans (not covered by my health insurance, I found out afterwards :( cost me over €2000) and no answers at all. My closest guess is gallbladder intermittent pain but im interested by one of the comments here about fallopian tube twisting.

My pain has never lasted days like yours so not sure its too similar. But I wanted to sympathise and hope you do get some answers.

Natsku · 29/03/2026 07:30

lottiestars76 · 28/03/2026 21:07

When I was pregnant with my first I had the exact same pain. Sharp and absolute agony and it started in my back and up to my shoulder blade, I thought for awhile it was trapped wind? I was around 28 weeks pregnant at this point, and even though my first I just somehow knew it wasn’t labour or related to pregnancy on some way. The pain got significantly worse and the only time I got any relief at all ( and this was a tiny bit of relief) was in the bath in scalding hot water. I eventually started throwing up and writhing in pain so my partner drove me to the hospital. We had already called 111 and they could hear me screaming in the background in agony so they had a place on a ward for me already, except for some unknown reason it was the acute geriatric ward. I was 24 years old and 28 weeks pregnant so not sure why I was sent there. When we pulled up at the hospital it was around 5 am an I collapsed on the carpark floor and was vomiting and screaming in agony my partner had to carry me all the way up several flights of stairs with me screaming and sobbing and throwing up. I was then left in a triage room where I carried on sobbing and screaming in pain and this pretty much continued for the next few hours. At this point my sick was green so just pure stomach acid, and I thought I was dying , the pain was nothing I had experienced. I eventually got given liquid morphine which helped knock me out, then I was sent for a scan. Nothing coming up with gall bladder or the baby (thank god even though I kept having to remind them I was pregnant and needed them to check my baby?!) the pain was returning and I was continuing to vomit. Eventually a specialist did another ultrasound and the could see that my baby was lying in such a position my kidney was obstructed. Essentially it was backed up with urine from her lying across and squishing it. They only checked my kidneys due to me being pregnant and otherwise said because my bloods didn’t show infection it wasn’t a kidney infection. Which it wasn’t, it was a kidney blockage essentially, but that doesn’t necessarily flag up inflammatory markers or infection markers on urine samples. I was then going to have surgery to have a stent inserted to manually drain my urine, however baby moved and the relief was almost instant. Still felt rough for a few days but the pain went immediately. That was nearly 12 years ago and I’ve had another two babies since plus lots of other infections, illnesses, a broken bone etc etc. Without a shadow of a doubt this was the worse pain I have ever felt in my life and I’d rather go through my first 60+ hour long labour 100 times over then experience that pain again. I genuinely thought I was dying and the helplessness I felt was unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. It really sounds to me like a kidney problem, and reading your posts about endometriosis I wonder if this has caused issues with the kidney, and is causing it to become impacted and backed up. The lack of weeing and the pain you have described along with blood results etc being ‘ fine’ makes me think it must be something along these lines. I’d push for a referral and a scan of your kidneys, because if it is caused by endo it won’t just disappear this will keep happening 😔 so sorry your experience was traumatic and hopefully once sorted you feel able to complain and raise the concerns around your experience. What you have gone through isn’t ok and you shouldn’t be medically gaslit and your pain minimised. Good luck xxx

I had this when I was pregnant. The pain was absolutely horrendous, I was begging the doctors to kill me. They put a stent in but it didn't help so they did a kidney catheter (tube in my side directly into my kidney) but I was still in agony and then they eventually realised I also had appendicitis! Worst 3 weeks of my life (two weeks in hospital before they realised and operated then another week as I had a massive postoperative infection)

Jake624 · 29/03/2026 06:49

elm26 · 26/03/2026 15:24

Yesterday at 1pm, I put my 6 month old on the rug with his toys and went for a wee.

As I was walking back I had a sudden severe pain in my right side radiating into my lower back and up to my shoulder, I was in agony.

I called DH who was luckily only on a job 15 mins away, he came straight home and took one look at me and called ambulance, I was shouting out in pain they gave me gas and air and morphine.

I had an emergency CT when dye last night and also have a catheter as lost the ability to wee. Nothing showed on CT, they got me settled on morphine and today I’ve had a transvaginal scan which shows ovaries and womb look normal.

Gynae can’t find a reason so they’ve stopped painkillers and just giving me paracetamol but somethings wrong I feel like somebody’s twisting my insides. The gynae consultant was horrible and said the surgical team will come see me if they think it’s worth it?? So I’m waiting for that if they come.

I’m in so much pain and genuinely scared they’ll send me home not knowing what is wrong with me.

Has anyone has anything similar?

I'm praying for you

Starbubble · 29/03/2026 06:43

I have endometriosis and adenomyosis and the pain is crippling sometimes. Do not leave until the surgical team have seen you! Advocate for yourself strongly, this is your body and you that has to live with the repercussions if it’s not looked into. Shoulder tip pain is common with gynae issues as the phrenetic nerve is involved with both areas. Wishing you well x

Tinytimmy123 · 29/03/2026 06:05

Thankyou to HotRootsAndNaughtyToots and hedgebets2 for so comprehensively coming up with the research in this.

It was beginning to feel like, ironically MyObservations didnt believe what I was saying and had to go and confirm/or not...with a man ! 😁

ForeverTheOptomist · 29/03/2026 06:01

Drippingfeed · 26/03/2026 22:44

Don't do this. AI simply summarises a lot of Internet hot air and scares people. Press for a proper diagnosis and proper pain relief.
And don't get your medical advice from here.

Show quote history

I agree. It's inherently incorrect.

MummyNJ · 29/03/2026 04:56

Gall stones or blocked gall bladder. The pain starts in your lower abdomen and radiates to your right shoulder. It is the usual pattern for gall bladder issues. Also look out for dark coloured urine almost brown and pale coloured poops. If the pain is severe try standing in a hot shower with the water directed to the shoulder and I find buscopan helps. Gall bladder pain can also make you vomit too.
To confirm you need to get an xray/ scan , but I

HotRootsAndNaughtyToots · 29/03/2026 02:44

MyObservations · 28/03/2026 22:00

And the evidence is where exactly? While you dig it out I'll ask my DinL who is an Obs & Gynae surgeon.

Show quote history

Starting with a BBC article because it's a good introduction to the subject:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/future/article/20180518-the-inequality-in-how-women-are-treated-for-pain

A short article in the BJN:
https://www.britishjournalofnursing.com/content/editorial/women-and-pain

A piece in the Wellbeing of Women:
https://www.wellbeingofwomen.org.uk/news/over-half-of-uk-women-feel-their-pain-is-ignored-or-dismissed-new-report-shows/

See also the Journal of Pain:
https://www.jpain.org/article/S1526-5900(24)00480-2/fulltext

The Lancet:
https://www.wellbeingofwomen.org.uk/news/over-half-of-uk-women-feel-their-pain-is-ignored-or-dismissed-new-report-shows/
...with this notable paragraph:
"Women are more likely to encounter scepticism regarding the severity or legitimacy of their symptoms as a result of gender biases and cultural norms ingrained in the medical discourse about women’s bodies and diseases over centuries. These beliefs can contribute to health-care professionals downplaying or attributing women's pain to psychological factors or hormonal fluctuations rather than addressing its underlying medical conditions."

Harvard Health Publishing:
https://www.health.harvard.edu/pain/the-dangerous-dismissal-of-womens-pain

This is just a starter-for-10. Medical misogyny is not only real, but well recognised within the scientific and medical communities, even though it remains prevalent.

It goes further than that though. Did you know the extent to which the world has been designed around men?

Until, I believe, relatively recently, car crash dummies were modelled on the male figure - height, weight and proportions - which mean that crash tests are passed when they would otherwise fail had the test modelled women's bodies.

Body armour, worn by those serving in the armed forces and police, has been designed to fit the male body, not female. Ask women who serve whether the stab vests they've been given fit correctly, or comfortably.

Men not women tend to be used for testing medicines, which mean doses and potency has been based on male height, weight and metabolism.

Anecdotally, you don't have to survey women widely to find numerous accounts of medical misogyny. These aren't vague and assumptive such as, "I was writhing in pain and sent home with paracetamol", but legitimate serious and life threatening health problems and medical emergencies. Or accounts of men and women being given totally different pain relief for the same presenting complaint - OTC for the woman, adequate pain relief for the man, and this is alluded to in one of the links I've provided above.

A relatively cursory search here on mumsnet will bring up dozens of accounts of women being forced to undergo painful medical procedures without any aneasthetic at all.

I'm really don't understand why you appear to be so affronted at the idea of medical misogyny?

Pain bias: The health inequality rarely discussed

When they’re in pain, women wait longer in the ER and are less likely to be given effective painkillers than men. BBC Future investigates for our new series the Health Gap.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/future/article/20180518-the-inequality-in-how-women-are-treated-for-pain

AppleDumplingWithCustard · 29/03/2026 02:39

BigBoxOfBees · 28/03/2026 21:10

Incorrect it’s a marker for the proteins in Ovarian cancer. Having seen a family member similarly dismissed multiple times (with endometriosis history and prior heavy periods, similar pain history) prior to discovering late stage ovarian cancer it seems wise to ask for this simple, quick check.

I know what it is. I’m merely saying that a number of conditions can cause a raised CA125. These include endometriosis, fibroids, inflammation and even menstruation. It is of little value as a stand-alone diagnostic.

bittertwisted · 29/03/2026 02:03

Wow, I cannot believe the lack of acknowledgment of your level of pain
I had similar symptoms, but not the changing to a dull ache
I was screaming in pain, had to curl in a ball when attempting to walk somewhere
had all the tests. completely dismissed and belittled by 111 and out of hours. Basically what do you expect us to do
I have had 3 big babies without epidural, smashed my elbow joint, with my bones sticking out

this pain was much worse and I was absolutely terrified of it

not had it since early January, I think now it was a twisted ovarian cyst, I really hope it doesn’t return and I have every camaraderie with your experience of pain being belittled and dismissed

AbleMa · 29/03/2026 00:18

Could be a hernia even trapped nerve sound awful but those things are

Cara707 · 28/03/2026 23:57

Also I agree with @FFSToEverythingSince2020 , you know something is wrong so don't give up until you have an answer.

Cara707 · 28/03/2026 23:55

Wow, it sounds like you've had an awful time in hospital (during a painful and traumatic time when you needed care and support!!). Do you have a supportive GP who you can discuss this with or could you contact PALS?

Are you in a position to pay for or raise money to see someone privately?

Sapphireblueeyes · 28/03/2026 23:38

Go to a different district and hospital just say you are on holiday.
Good Luck 🤞 💐

ScreamingBeans · 28/03/2026 23:14

I hope you are okay OP

FFSToEverythingSince2020 · 28/03/2026 22:54

elm26 · 28/03/2026 10:03

They’re sending me home. Surgical team refusing to see me even though I’ve been promised for the last 3 days they’ll come and review. I’ve asked for it to be noted on my notes that they’ve refused. They don’t know what’s wrong with me, said the scans would have shown any kidney stones, gallstones, pancreas issues, bladder issues but they can’t find anything. Referred me back to gynae for a new type of contraceptive pill for those with endo. Still don’t know what that’s got to do with anything. Discharging me with paracetamol even though I’ve needed oramorph 3 times since 10pm last night. I’ve given up. I’m so fed up. In pain. She said if I get another “attack” like I did, to go to A&E and not to ring an ambulance unless life threatening.

While you don’t owe anyone an update, I just wanted to say that I hope you’re okay, OP. I hate knowing someone else is in so much pain and there’s nothing any of us can do to practically help. I’m hoping that your silence is because you are finally getting the medical care that you need, though I really, really hope you didn’t have to worsen to get it. When I was in hospital in January, there was a woman across from me who had been to the hospital in terrible pain for a week; they couldn’t find any cause so sent her home. She went home, terrible pain for a few more days, and then she actually lost consciousness and her teenager called 999. Back she goes to hospital and now a scan shows that part of her spleen lost blood supply and the issue was only visible on scans at that point. I guess this random story is hopefully a good distraction! And the point of it is to say, please don’t doubt yourself. You know your body. Very, very best of luck.

itwasyourshowallalong · 28/03/2026 22:52

likelysuspect · 28/03/2026 22:09

Oh well you must be right then

I attempted this with one of my clients which is why Im talking from experience, the people on the ground clearly dont agree with you. We were (virtually) laughed out of the ward, but it wasnt taken seriously at all, in similar (not identical) circumstances, patient not great, but not deteriorating and can be managed at home

OP will come back no doubt and say this worked yes?

Show quote history

I would bloody well hope so, yes

The aim is to make care safer, and we have been VERY clear that if that means additional reviews then so be it

I would strongly advise that, if you feel that you are not taken seriously, then you escalate as needed. I’ve had one recently that needed urgent OOH attention and was sent to the director on call, who then made the necessary arrangements with CC outreach. However, this is very much an exception to the norm. I’m sorry if your experience hasn’t been helpful, but that doesn’t mean that’s the case across the board

Abricot1983 · 28/03/2026 22:46

Which hospital are you in? If they discharge you then go to the A&E of a teaching hospital

Littlejellyuk · 28/03/2026 22:38

FFSToEverythingSince2020 · 27/03/2026 20:19

Have they mentioned if your blood infection markers are normal? Low stats can be an infection. Blood clots should show on a blood test, but I don’t know if it’s on the routine ones. But this all needs to be discussed because you can’t leave the hospital and care for the children, especially a baby and a toddler, until you have a solution for the pain. It sounds like it’s only manageable right now on Oramorph and codeine.

Show quote history

This 👆 💯
Get blood infection markers checked and also get them to check your bowel. It could have an infection or be twisted in a certain area.
I know of different people this has happened to and it wasn't pretty, but bloody painful.

Hope you're okay OP @elm26

Abricot1983 · 28/03/2026 22:36
  • Martha's Rule (England): Being rolled out from April 2024, this allows patients, families, and staff to request a rapid review by a separate critical care team if they are concerned a patient’s condition is not improving or being taken seriously.
Jukeboxjulie69 · 28/03/2026 22:13

elm26 · 26/03/2026 15:24

Yesterday at 1pm, I put my 6 month old on the rug with his toys and went for a wee.

As I was walking back I had a sudden severe pain in my right side radiating into my lower back and up to my shoulder, I was in agony.

I called DH who was luckily only on a job 15 mins away, he came straight home and took one look at me and called ambulance, I was shouting out in pain they gave me gas and air and morphine.

I had an emergency CT when dye last night and also have a catheter as lost the ability to wee. Nothing showed on CT, they got me settled on morphine and today I’ve had a transvaginal scan which shows ovaries and womb look normal.

Gynae can’t find a reason so they’ve stopped painkillers and just giving me paracetamol but somethings wrong I feel like somebody’s twisting my insides. The gynae consultant was horrible and said the surgical team will come see me if they think it’s worth it?? So I’m waiting for that if they come.

I’m in so much pain and genuinely scared they’ll send me home not knowing what is wrong with me.

Has anyone has anything similar?

Possibly gallbladder. Classic symptom of choleocystitis is right side upper abdominal pain just under liver that radiates to the right should blade area

hedgebets2 · 28/03/2026 22:13

MyObservations · 28/03/2026 22:00

And the evidence is where exactly? While you dig it out I'll ask my DinL who is an Obs & Gynae surgeon.

Show quote history

Endometriosis is the most obvious one. I’ve never seen a man left crying and screaming in pain for a decade, on morphine and told it’s just how periods are
There’s also been more studies into male pattern baldness than endo, and it says everything that one study was how attractive endo sufferers are

then there’s the heart attack gender gap
https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/understanding-heart-attack-gender-gap-201604159495

This is more up to date
https://www.bhf.org.uk/what-we-do/news-from-the-bhf/news-archive/2019/september/heart-attack-gender-gap-is-costing-womens-lives

Here’s a report on gynae issues
https://committees.parliament.uk/committee/328/women-and-equalities-committee/news/204316/medical-misogyny-is-leaving-women-in-unnecessary-pain-and-undiagnosed-for-years/

Here’s a report including Mumsnet
https://www.theguardian.com/society/2026/mar/08/nhs-letting-women-down-medical-misogyny-report

A BMJ report because coil fitting never routinely had pain relief until my friend fought for it

https://www.bmj.com/content/390/bmj.r1234.full

Here’s one with some links, it wasn’t mandatory in the US to include women in clinic trials until 1993
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2024-07-27/women-share-experiences-with-medical-misogyny-in-australia/104034918

i mean I could go on with talking about pain relief for hysteroscopy, descriptions of “discomfort so take a paracetamol beforehand” and exactly how I nearly lost my job over endometriosis and being told to take the pill as they couldn’t do anything else but these are a good start

Understanding the heart attack gender gap - Harvard Health

...

https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/understanding-heart-attack-gender-gap-201604159495

likelysuspect · 28/03/2026 22:09

itwasyourshowallalong · 28/03/2026 21:38

No. She wouldn’t.

And as someone who
has been responsible for rolling this out, I can categorically state that you are factually incorrect

Show quote history

Oh well you must be right then

I attempted this with one of my clients which is why Im talking from experience, the people on the ground clearly dont agree with you. We were (virtually) laughed out of the ward, but it wasnt taken seriously at all, in similar (not identical) circumstances, patient not great, but not deteriorating and can be managed at home

OP will come back no doubt and say this worked yes?

Restlessdreams1994 · 28/03/2026 22:06

TheWindyWildebeest · 28/03/2026 22:03

No…..you’re probably right NosejobNelly. Having read a bit further down, sounds like the consensus seems to be that likely a renal/gallbladder problem. Know my husband passed a kidney stone a few years ago and pain was so bad, he went into shock. And Cholecystits/gallstones are also meant to be agony. Definitely think OP should stand her ground and insist these other potential causes be excluded before being discharged.

She had a CT scan of her abdomen with contrast. This would have shown any kidney stones, gallstones or any significant cholecystitis, pancreatitis, pyelonephritis, any bowel obstruction or perforation etc. Blood tests were also done.