"Not all men” replies are ridiculous

@CanSeeClearlyNowTheRainHasGone

If 1 in 4 women will be raped in their life time it can’t be a tiny minority, even accounting for each rapist making multiple rapes.

1 woman is killed every 5 days by a man in the Uk

More men are killed by MEN than women.

99% of women have encountered a man acting inappropriately towards them, examples are flashing, up skirting, stalking, groping, date rape drugging etc. Of these 99% of women nearly all of them have encountered this multiple times.

It is not a tiny minority.

Sigh.

• Almost a quarter of men interviewed admitted they had committed rape

Do you understand how bad that survey was? Or at least how badly you quote parts of it completely out of context?

This was a survey, exclusively of men, primarily within a tight age range and covering behaviours over their lifetime. It includes "verbal coercion" to "kissing or sexual touching" and records the vast majority of incidents with people that are known to each other, on a date together.
It fails to record whether the response to "I'm going to kiss you (statement/ action)" was welcome or unwelcome.

It also fails to baseline the survey with a comparable sample of women allowing you to assume that no women ever leaned in for a kiss or touched a man without first seeking consent. That allowed the authors to make statements like "a quarter of men..." without having to acknowledge "and 25% of women".

If you're going to quote stats (a good habit by the way, and credit for the links), please please please try to understand what you're extracting and what the actual significance is.

You might want to read my comment on the previous page, filled with some stats.

I'd argue that most men are 'shits' in mild ways, especially in regards to excusing and allowing other men to be abusive - but only a large minority are actively abusive in serious ways.

Yay?

"Yes, most people in power are men.
Yes, most people in power seem to be shits.
No, most men are not shits."

Your statistics point, already made many times on this thread, is sound. However, the above is also flawed logic. The two premises do not prove or disprove the conclusion 'most men are not shits'. We don't know. Thing is, we don't have population wide data on what men do (conviction rates likely to be very low for sexual crimes) or would do if they could get away with it (although the Pelicot and Cyprus cases and some surveys asking men whether they would rape if consequence free suggest significant numbers).

There is absolutely no basis for saying it's a 'tiny, tiny majority of men' as in a previous comment. Even if a significant minority, that's far far too high and we should be more worried about the harms to women than about offending the men who aren't shits. They benefit from the situation, by being 'one of the good guys'.

I disagree.

If 1 in 4 women will be raped in their life time it can’t be a tiny minority, even accounting for each rapist making multiple rapes.

1 woman is killed every 5 days by a man in the Uk
More men are killed by MEN than women.

99% of women have encountered a man acting inappropriately towards them, examples are flashing, up skirting, stalking, groping, date rape drugging etc. Of these 99% of women nearly all of them have encountered this multiple times.

It is not a tiny minority.

Your understanding of statistics is appalling...

90% of crimes are committed by men does not equate to 90% of men committing crimes, which is what you are trying to imply.

If there was only one crime committed, and that was committed by a women, would you cite "100% of crimes are committed by (all) women"??

The fact that most women (around the world) do not have equal rights doesn't imply that men are bad. It certainly doesn't imply that UK men are bad just because other countries subjugate their women. Some believe (mistakenly or not) that increased protection is worth reduced rights.

You are making the common mistake of confusing "men" with "people in power".

Yes, most people in power are men.
Yes, most people in power seem to be shits.
No, most men are not shits.

"All dogs are animals" does not equate to "all animals are dogs".

Exactly what I was going to say. The hotel case in Cyprus a few years ago, when random men along a hotel corridor were invited to rape an unconscious woman and all either accepted, watched or didn't report, made it clear it wasn't the exception there. I and many others thought it was unrepresentative- a combination of bad luck and the kind of men who went on a particular kind of lads holiday. The Gisele Pelicot case disproved that. It was Monsieur Tout le Monde. Not a minority at all.

Maybe because some poster's get sick of I hate all men but I am desperate to get one and now I follow him and search through his phone or social media because I am craving attention and I am worried he is cheating. I cant think for myself because men do all my thinking for me. I want to endlessy complain about how terrible of a man and father he is but I will keep on doing nothng because he pays the bills and means I dont have to work but I have a child with him then have more but remember I hate all men

Or more realistically 10 Maltesers and 3 were made out of poo

That may be your experience, but in that case you're a statistical outlier, and very unusual in having experienced more 'sketchy' behaviour from women than men.

The statistics make it undeniably clear that men are consistently far more harmful - in both minor and major regards - to women, to other men, and to children, than women are.

That's simply not true. I can assure you I've encountered more sketchy behaviour toward me from other women than I have from men. I tend to pay more attention to people I know rather than 'randoms' I don't - and the men I actually know are amazing!

Which surely proves the point that it's not all men? And, again, it's surely down to personal experience. The men in my life have been nothing short of incredible - I likely wouldn't be here without two of them. The women? Not so much. 🤷‍♀️

And sadly, as so often, it's nailed in the first post. I don't know where we go from here,

• 54% of young Australian men watch pornography weekly.
• Almost one in six Australian men has sexual feelings towards children and teenagers
• Almost one in 10 acknowledge having committed child sexual offences, despite few being caught.
• 1 in 15 men admit they would have sexual contact with a child aged 14 or younger, if no one would find out.
• Almost one third of Gen Z men agree a wife should always obey her husband
• 59% of Gen Z, 56% of Millennial, and 53% of Gen X men agree men are expected to do too much for sex equality.
• 57% of Gen Z, 54% of Millennial, and 52% of Gen X men think society is now discriminating against men
• 1 in 3 men admits to having been emotionally abusive to an intimate partner
• 1 in 10 men admits to being physically abusive to their partner
• "A high proportion of men report that they would commit a considerably violent rape if they could be assured that they would not get caught" - Psychology Professor Richard E. Mattson, who co-conducted research on the subject.
• Almost a quarter of men interviewed admitted they had committed rape

It's at minimum a pretty sizeable minority of men...and in some cases, a definite majority. So no, it's not 'all men', it's: 'a depressingly huge percentage of men, so have fun figuring out if the one you're talking to is one of the one in fifteen who'd rape a child, or one of the 50+% who thinks you should obey him if you marry, or one of the one in ten who's physically abusive'.

So what do they do about it?

I am glad you are surrounded by men like this. Most women are sadly not. And that’s what not all men dismisses - which I think op was trying to say

Yes I agree with you, the fact is lots of boys hate the ‘type’ of boys we are are talking about themselves!!

if people said eg majority of x would that be better ?

First post nails it.😆🤷‍♀️

No but like he pointed to low conviction rates for rape as a good thing 🫠
also he’s a man so he wouldn’t be a pick me.
also I have boys too, that’s why I want them to be extra aware of this than just pretending it doesn’t exist and hurting a woman by accident - which a lot of men do.
but not all men, right?
by refusing to believe we can do better, you’re expecting the best of the men in your life?

That makes no sense
if you say ‘all men’ then you do mean your DH your DF your DS

Don’t even bother
you will be called a ‘pick me’ girl because you dare to point out simple reality of statistics
I love my 3 sons, I know they are fucking amazing
to be told that makes me an apologist is tragic
i will never apologise for choosing to believe in good men and boys, despite the fact the bad ones cause so much damage

Of course on the whole nobody thinks that about their own son/brother/father/husband.

But it's somebody's. And it is so prevalent (see my post about the 70000) that yes, it will be our men too.