Proposed to him and he said no

Here comes the judge. There is no need for that statement

I think that is exactly why lots of people get married.

I have read so many posts on here from women who have lived with a man, had children with a man, moved into a house with his name on and then given up work to look after the children whilst he carries on working and paying into his pension who end up gutted when he leaves her with absolutely nothing.

Marriage is so much more than a piece of paper.

It makes me cringe when I hear people say, “he’d never cheat, we’re married now” or hearing people promise to love someone through sickness and health then one of them gets sick a couple of years later and they divorce them because they can’t hack it. Marriage is a joke these days. It’s not worth the ‘piece of paper’ it’s written on. The fact you can get divorced in less than a day on the internet says it all

Love, insecurity (as in they believe he’ll be less likely to cheat or leave her if they’re married), as a marker of ‘success’, because it’s “just what people do”, just to have a fancy wedding

I know several examples of men in long-term relationships who "didn't want to get married at all". One broke up with his partner, met someone else, (yes, he really did meet the new gf AFTER he'd broken up with his partner) and married his new girlfriend within six months. What these men mean when they tell you they don't want to get married, is that they don't want to marry YOU. Sorry for being so blunt, but it might help.

Why do the vast majority of women want to get married then in your opinion?

And it’s always people who don’t want to get married who say it (what’s the issue then if it’s ‘just a piece of paper?’). They know perfectly well it isn’t just a piece of paper. It makes as much sense as saying your mortgage is just a piece of paper so I won’t bother paying it.

If you don’t know after two years if you could see yourself marrying that person then you’re wasting that person’s time in my opinion.

Year’s ago I had a bf with the same attitude as yours. I finally left after six bloody years!!

This. I can't believe that some people really believe marriage is just a piece of paper. I cringe when I see/hear someone say this. How can anyone possibly think this?! It's an extremely important and vital document. I'm embarrassed for anyone who thinks or says marriage is just a piece of paper. LOL, get a clue! Probably think 'common law wife' is actually real too. hint: it's not.

Lol don’t pretend the vast majority of women want to get married for the legal and financial implications

Because of the legal and financial implications? It's not just 'a piece of paper'.

All this for a piece of paper. Why are women so obsessed with marriage?

Don't waste any more time with him.

You only live once never compromise. Although its not included in the text I wonder if you secretly are the type who pines for unavailable men. Reflect on what made you so sure he is the one for you because he definitely doesn't feel the same way for you

Sorry your heart broken but its better that it has happened now. Its time to move on and find someone who loves you. Hope with time you can see how he's not the one for you. And you have avoided a loveless marriage and future divorce or even a one sided relationship or romance even. Sometimes its hard to see that especially when your madly in love. All the best sweetheart ❤

My youngest daughter lived with her husband for 7 yrs before they married, on their wedding day she was 6 months months pregnant with her second child.

However, after 4 yrs she did go backpacking for 6 months to make her mind up, they got back together, they are very happy with 4 children.

So for the OP take a break go backpacking.

Run girl, run! He is keeping you at arms length. Have seen this before - stringing you along and wasting your best years. Still won’t commit in a few years time… you’ll split and then he’ll marry the next woman who comes along like someone else also said above. He is not the one for you, certainly not right now anyway. Sounds immature tbh and the emotional fencing is a disastrous way to begin a marriage. He wants to have his cake and eat it and you are letting him girl. Eg 1. I love you more than life - but I don’t want to commit to you. 2. I am so emotionally available to you - but I keep my guard up around you. 3. I’ve told you that you’re my ‘one’ but I have said no to actually making that commitment real (through engagement). Read the signs girl, they are all there. And then head for the hills!

If you carry on together it will be difficult to go past the refusal he made to marry you because if he felt the same he would have said yes, whatever his previous relationship was like.

I don’t think your boyfriend’s parents should have said anything if honest, it’s something they should have steered well clear of.

I would definitely think about calling it a day and find someone new, this man is not for you!
.

OP hasn't replied once since they posted 5 days ago, I'm amazed people are still commenting!

Bear in mind that they do not even live together.

Never ask a man to get married.
That's his job.

If he is undecided after two years but you stay together how could you ever know he is being honest if in the future he said he was ready for marriage! I know a lot depends on how strong your relationship is but be wary.

From a guy's point of view, this is needy to the point of giving an irrepairable 'ick'.

A major turn off for any self-respecting guy. You might not like to hear that and I appreciate it's blunt but Jesus wept, read the room.

As always.....The best advice is to talk.

Wrong.