My sister keeps criticising me for travelling

This is a bit unhinged and nonsensical. Even out of my child free friends and aquaintances I don't really know anyone who takes a European city break monthly - irrespective of income. To that end, someone who does criticising someone else for travelling just doesn't make sense. She's projecting - ignore her.

YANBU OP, ultimately it's non of your sister's business. However, it sounds more like concern than hypocrisy or jealousy to me.

Unless you have an excellent pension and will be able to afford to continue renting in old age, I would be prioritising getting on the housing ladder over travelling at your age.

Thats a bit harsh. It’s great that travelling with kids has worked out for you. I too like travelling with my two. But it’s totally okay to also not want to travel with kids. OP has had the foresight to realise that kids isn’t what she wants - it’s a shame her sister didn’t do the same it seems.

Sounds like jealousy. I'm 35, 1 dd and a baby on the way. My two younger siblings are currently living the life travelling and I'm happy for them. I did all that too before this and now life is just a bit busier. Your sister has no right to judge. Enjoy your life, you never have to justify it to others.

Maybe you’re not too different from your DSis.

Travelling with kids really isn’t that bad. I’ve been on so many holidays with mine and can’t recall a bad trip. We even once travelled around Italy for 3 weeks (with our 7 and 10 year old), using public transport only and choosing where to go and where to stay as we went - it was an amazing experience for our family.

We even took the kids on our honeymoon, we’d never go off and fun without them if they could join in too.

When you have kids they become a part of your lives, you drag them along everywhere. Those that don’t may regret the consequences when their kids grow up to have no time for their parents. You reap what you sow.

Also what was their logic in having another child when they don’t take care of the first one

I don’t understand why you’re bitching about them behind their back to your friends but not giving them what sounds like a very needed reality check to their face. They sound like terrible parents.

She’s projecting - maybe she is feeling guilty that the children are disrupted by their travel plans, maybe they are made to feel guilty by others.

I would also judge them. I would be tempted to give them a piece of my mind if the kids were being upset by their selfishness, but I would resist the temptation to lay into her.

Think carefully about what outcomes you want to achieve if you decide to say something. A good outcome would be that the children are not disrupted, or are disrupted less. And she stops deflecting.

Two words are necessary, Butt out! I never know why people on here engage with rude, nosey family and then moan, don't give them the chance!

Ah, I see what you mean now.

I don't think you would have necessarily got stick for pointing out the other stuff btw. I think, rather, it would have added more context from the start.

Yep, they don't sound like great parents. Have the bils parents made any fuss? Surely, they must be feeling the effects of all this. And the kids must be acting out to their parents, you would think?

It’s not really though is it. It’s totally fair for someone to not like the idea of travelling with children. As long as they remain childfree (which the OP is) if they wish to carry on travelling!

But yet you "feel for the kids" so that's a bit of a contrary viewpoint!

It’s not really ‘valid’ to have 2 kids in quick succession, neither of whom have been on this earth for more than 3 years and dump them 12+ times a year just because you want to travel without them. It’s incredibly sad really, whilst holidays look different with kids, they still can be extremely enjoyable.

That isn’t a valid reason to go without your kids.

If they were going away monthly for work purposes, then leaving them behind would be valid.

Edit. My bad read the post wrong

What does (valid) mean...confused?

Your sister is well out of order. It’s amazing how some people feel entitled to criticise like this.

Having said that, please pay regularly into a stock and share ISA, for the long term. Don’t tell her that you do.

@whoamitocomplain are your 4 holidays a year just using up your holiday allowance from work, or are you actually travelling for long periods of time each of the 4 times you’re away?

If just 4 normal holidays, then that’s nothing unusual and you’re clearly settled just not yet with the mortgage.

If not working and still travelling your DS may just be getting worried about you never being able to settle down.

Saying this though, your DSis leaving her children monthly for long weekends away is an odd but tbh once the first goes to school this freedom will stop. It’s a short lived enjoyment.

You should stop judging each other.

I would tell your dsis that you’ll stop all the trips when you have the responsibility of dc because they’ll come first.

That's awful! I feel for those poor kids. what is their reason for not taking the kids with them? And, surely they see all this upset happening with their kids and chose to ignore it. Also, why don't bils parents shut it down when it's causing upset to the children?