When I'm distressed I talk about my feelings alot

This is a recently banned poster who has a long history of threads on these same topics.

I don't know if you're in therapy or not but that would be a good step

I have found that if I need to vent I do it to chatGPT You can vent as much as you want and it'll reply.

I find myself hardly ever venting to my real life people and they're probably relieved

You need to stop talking to your ex about your trauma from the relationship. The person who hurt you can't help you or heal you.

You’ve had so much advice on this thread and the others you have started. You choose not to engage and so I’m not sure what you want here. You need to seek real life support.

what does support look like to you?

Can't you see that you completely dismissed his feelings because you wanted him to feel something for you that he doesn't. He was telling you loud and clear that your relationship was over and you just kept at him, thats not healthy.
Even now over a year afterwards you are still badgering him and going on about what you want and how you feel.
It really does sound as if your marriage ended because you couldn't stop talking about your feelings and going over and over and over it again. You say your angry because he just stopped loving you but it wasn't sudden it was a death of a thousand cuts, everytime you started on about your "trauma" it will have killed his live for you a little bit more.
Your friend Debbie has depression and you've stopped talking to her, what does mean have you ghosted her or have you just stopped talking about your problems? Do you ever let her talk about her feelings, do you support her at all?
The sad fact is that everyone in real life are saying the same thing as most of the posters on here but you wont listen, you need to stop talking about it and move on (yes i know easier said than done) with the right psychiatric help whether thats cbt, dbt or some other type of therapy. When everyone is telling you the same thing they are telling you the truth and you really need to listen and stop painting yourself as the victim because you aren't, you are the master of your own misery

Good point. Will hide post now.

The best thing we can do is not engage. She’s not in a particularly stable state of mind at the moment and is misconstruing our remarks, and so Im concerned we might inadvertently make things worse.

She’s been posting for at least six years. I totally agree re the help she needs

OP, your previous threads include posts in which you admit to throwing plates, and more than one in which you admit to being drunk. In one post you said you’d drunk nine pints of beer in an afternoon without even realising it.

You have been posting semi-coherently and angrily for two or three years and you don’t accept any responsibility for your own behaviour. I think you were sectioned at one point. You are very unwell and you need psychiatric support and you need to stop drinking.

I know you hate the term trauma dumping but your writing style suggests a stream of consciousness.

Forget about counselling, I think you need to go to the GP and, if necessary, go back to hospital. Things have clearly been bad for a long time and you owe it to yourself and your family to heal.

Okay, bye.

@Hippychickbbbb Kindly, I don't think you are going to find the support you need here. You sound quite unwell, possibly suffering from complex PTSD, and most people on Mumsnet won't be able to help you with the impact of that on your life and relationships. It can be supportive here but it can also be quite "tough love" and that can be hard to hear when you're not in the right place to take that.

The Complex PTSD workbook by Arielle Schwartz might be helpful alongside therapy. DBT skills may also be beneficial to help with building the inner resources to cope with distressing feelings without resorting to doing unhelpful things, such as overloading others with your distress and trauma and straining your relationships. Rebuilding after trauma requires a conscious effort to rebuild your identity, think about what your values are and how to live them, engage in activities that feel positive, creative or constructive for you, even small things, and try to visualise the future you would want for yourself.

Counselling may not necessarily be helpful if it's just talking, as that can keep you stuck. It can be useful for some people, but if you don't find you're progressing, you may need to find a therapist that has a more trauma informed, integrative approach and can offer something like EMDR to help you process past experiences if you are having things like flashbacks or intrusive memories that affect your day to day life.

I strongly suspect OP has a diagnosis of a personality disorder. It’s often as a result of trauma in childhood, which from OP’s other threads I suspect she has. Unfortunately, it does often mean that the affected persons perception of reality bears no resemblance to the truth.

ETA my personal experience means I think it’s pretty impossible to engage in constructive conversation when someone is acting like OP.

@Hippychickbbbb I really don't think that you understand quite how damaging and frankly toxic your behaviour (as described by you over multiple threads over the years) is. Your need to always centre everything around your feelings and "trauma" ignoring everyone else's feelings and needs is a sign of a maladaptive personality disorder.
You fail to see the harm you cause and refuse to accept that your behaviour is borderline abusive. Your need to always control the narrative even on this thread to the point that you want to control the speach of posters on here is another form of you shaping facts and situations so that you can maintain your victim hood instead of facing the reality that you are the problem and until you can accept that this recurring situation is is due to your behaviour and victim mentality you will never change and every relationship that you have will end the same.
Its time for you to make a decision to actually engage with proper psychiatric help and really look at things from other people's perspective and see yourself not as a victim of circumstance or other people's reactions to you but the architect of your own misery of continue as you are and watch everyone including your dd walk away from you for their own sanity.
I understand that what I've said will be hard for you to hear but that doesn't make it any less true. I hope that you listen to what pp and I have said to you over this thread and talk to your therapist about it as it will help you if you want to change.

People have asked you questions in an attempt to support you. Nobody can do that if you completely ignore the questions people have asked.

It’s a bit rude too tbh when people have taken the time to reply to you.

Was that to me? It really is easier if you can quote posts.

Okay if you are sober then you still come across as angry to people who are suggesting help, getting defensive about the term trauma dumping.

You need to find a good therapist who had experience with your type of trauma. You are clearly not coping and there are people out there who can help you.

Were you diagnosed with psychosis or mania?