Page 5 | To hate "outdoor clothes" in the bed?

Clover96 · 2026-02-20T18:00:26+00:00

Bit of a silly one really but please help settle a domestic disagreement 😅 Am I being unreasonable to not want my partner wearing the clothes he's worn out and about all day, in or even laying on the bed? He showered in the morning, went to work, hasn't changed his clothes since coming home and lay in the bed. He thinks I'm being dramatic / naggy to want him to change his clothes. We only changed the bedding last night and I never wear the clothes I've worn out in the bed, he doesn't really see the issue.

Original poster

Clover96 · 20/02/2026 19:51

MargeryBargery · 20/02/2026 19:41

He gets into bed with his clothes on????

He's a barbarian OP.

Absolutely. Behaviour of a mad man.

OP posts:

SouthernNights59 · 20/02/2026 19:50

I lie on my bed, and sometimes in my bed, with outdoor clothes on. Guess what has happened - absolutely nothing! Why are so many people so hung up on non issues like this?

In the words of The Doors - people are strange.

NotMeAtAll · 20/02/2026 19:50

It would not be an issue for me at all.

SwedishEdith · 20/02/2026 19:46

I don't actually understand the "in bed" bit. Is he getting in under the covers in all the clothes he's worn to work all day?

CaragianettE · 20/02/2026 19:44

greglet · 20/02/2026 19:38

On the bed is fine; in the bed (as in under the covers) absolutely not.

Why, though? What’s the logic? Insects on the top of the duvet cover could perfectly well crawl in the bed. Unless you never sleep with your arms outside the covers, you could touch germs or dirt on the outside as much as the inside. Personally my duvet cover has the same pattern on both sides, so half the time when I’m making the bed in the morning I’m probably turning the outer side in.

MargeryBargery · 20/02/2026 19:41

He gets into bed with his clothes on????

He's a barbarian OP.

TreesinthePark · 20/02/2026 19:41

CaragianettE · 20/02/2026 19:32

I’d never heard of ‘house clothes’. That must generate a lot of washing.

If you also go to the gym or swimming are you then changing clothes about five times a day? Pajamas into ‘outside’ clothes, outside clothes into gym clothes, then back into outside clothes, then house clothes, then pajamas?

Unless you put the outside clothes immediately into a hot wash every day when you get home, then surely whatever you think is on them is coming into the house anyway? Fleas in the laundry basket is obviously better than fleas in the bed, but aren’t fleas in the laundry basket ultimately likely to wind up in the bed?

I'm shocked you've never heard of house clothes!

My houseclothes sometimes I specifically buy as loungwear for home, sometimes its outside clothes that have got too old/worn to wear out. Sometimes it's an online order that doesn't quite suit me but is cheap enough not to bother returning!

TenWeeCaramelJoeys · 20/02/2026 19:39

Createausername1970 · 20/02/2026 19:22

Yes, my son is the same. But he has to be prised out of his room anyway, so they often don't really earn the description "outdoor clothes" as the only "outdoor" they experience is pegged on the washing line 😁

Edited

Show quote history

😂😂

greglet · 20/02/2026 19:38

On the bed is fine; in the bed (as in under the covers) absolutely not.

CaragianettE · 20/02/2026 19:36

Marmalademorning · 20/02/2026 19:34

That is just gross, and I'm shocked that so many people voted YABU to be honest OP. It takes a minute to change into bed clothes.

Are ‘bed clothes’ pajamas? Or another special set of clothes in between?

Do some people have outside clothes, house clothes, bed clothes, and pajamas?

Marmalademorning · 20/02/2026 19:34

That is just gross, and I'm shocked that so many people voted YABU to be honest OP. It takes a minute to change into bed clothes.

onlyoneoftheregimentinstep · 20/02/2026 19:33

This is Mumsnet. In real
life outdoor clothes on the bed aren’t worth a passing thought. On Mumsnet they’re a hanging offence.

CaragianettE · 20/02/2026 19:32

I’d never heard of ‘house clothes’. That must generate a lot of washing.

If you also go to the gym or swimming are you then changing clothes about five times a day? Pajamas into ‘outside’ clothes, outside clothes into gym clothes, then back into outside clothes, then house clothes, then pajamas?

Unless you put the outside clothes immediately into a hot wash every day when you get home, then surely whatever you think is on them is coming into the house anyway? Fleas in the laundry basket is obviously better than fleas in the bed, but aren’t fleas in the laundry basket ultimately likely to wind up in the bed?

TreesinthePark · 20/02/2026 19:31

I have this as a "rule" for myself but bite my tongue when my partner stays over. I have outside clothes, lounging in the house clothes (that i might have cooked in, frying onions etc) and nightwear for bed with little to no crossover.

I can see how it would sound like nagging to someone else if its just not on thier radar.

Nofeckingway · 20/02/2026 19:28

No fucking way would he get in my bed with anything like that on . Especially if I changed sheets . I feel bad getting in my clean sheets without shower and clean PJs . Only PJs or clean boxers allowed at any time . And would be cringing if he was sitting on top .
And on the other side , there are people who allow dogs and cats in beds .
Nowt as queer as folk .

GingerPants · 20/02/2026 19:25

MasterBeth · 20/02/2026 19:23

Well, good for you. But plenty of us manage to go through the day without getting grimy.

Show quote history

Well not me.

Even if I’m not grimy I wouldn’t get in my clothes.

StedSarandos · 20/02/2026 19:24

Yanbu. I wouldn't even have my own outdoor clothes on my bed.

oviraptor21 · 20/02/2026 19:23

It doesn't even need to be said in this household - it's just not done. Who even wants to get into bed in outside clothes?
On the bed is OK as long as the clothes are not dirty/smelly.

MasterBeth · 20/02/2026 19:23

GingerPants · 20/02/2026 19:05

I definitely do. I walk in woodland and I work in a reception classroom. Both are dirty in different ways.

Show quote history

Well, good for you. But plenty of us manage to go through the day without getting grimy.

Createausername1970 · 20/02/2026 19:22

TenWeeCaramelJoeys · 20/02/2026 19:13

I had no idea this was a thing for some people. It isn’t the sort of thing that would come up in our house, but if it did I wouldn’t give a hoot. My 17yo is probably sleeping in his clothes right now (he has ASD/ADHD and sleeps at stupid times) but I’m not about to burst in and check.

Yes, my son is the same. But he has to be prised out of his room anyway, so they often don't really earn the description "outdoor clothes" as the only "outdoor" they experience is pegged on the washing line 😁

Createausername1970 · 20/02/2026 19:19

On the bed - no problem. I sit on the bed to get undressed. I am getting older, balancing on one leg to take off a pair of leggings could end in tears before bedtime. So I sit on the bed in outdoor clothes every day.

In the bed - not so great, plus it would be far less snuggly than my PJs, so I couldn't imagine doing that.

JemimaTiggywinkles · 20/02/2026 19:19

Naked bodies are definitely more germy than clothes (even if they shower regularly) so I think you’re being illogical to allow him on the bed but not his clothes.

UniquePinkSwan · 20/02/2026 19:14

I really don’t care.

TenWeeCaramelJoeys · 20/02/2026 19:13

I had no idea this was a thing for some people. It isn’t the sort of thing that would come up in our house, but if it did I wouldn’t give a hoot. My 17yo is probably sleeping in his clothes right now (he has ASD/ADHD and sleeps at stupid times) but I’m not about to burst in and check.

PandoraSocks · 20/02/2026 19:12

MsOtisReflects · 20/02/2026 18:48

Agree with everything @Olderandwiserpossibly says. I’ve been accustomed to changing into house clothes my entire life (60 odd years). Anything else is gross.

And also, those people wearing their grimy outdoor clothes at home are the same people wondering why all their clothes wear out so quickly and never look crisp and fresh.

I am curious. What do you use as 'house clothes"? Just normal clothes that you never wear outside? Joggers/PJs?