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Original poster

To hate "outdoor clothes" in the bed?

156 replies

Clover96 · 20/02/2026 18:00

Bit of a silly one really but please help settle a domestic disagreement 😅

Am I being unreasonable to not want my partner wearing the clothes he's worn out and about all day, in or even laying on the bed? He showered in the morning, went to work, hasn't changed his clothes since coming home and lay in the bed. He thinks I'm being dramatic / naggy to want him to change his clothes.

We only changed the bedding last night and I never wear the clothes I've worn out in the bed, he doesn't really see the issue.

OP posts:
Sassiskt · 20/02/2026 20:51

Cola32 · 20/02/2026 20:43

It’s not irrational though. If you’re sitting on public transport, or on a seat in a cafe, or a public bench, you don't want to carry that grime into your bed.

You just change into a pair of indoor leggings or whatever.

People on here seem to think showering daily is obsessive, yet sitting on the sofa in outdoor shoes and having your dog lick your face is normal.

It definitely skews the other way.

Show quote history

But what’s going to happen to you because of those ‘germs’. The person sneezing on the bus is likely to be a billion times worse for you than these ‘germs’. That’s why I don’t use buses. But outdoor and indoor clothes is a bit mad to me.

Cola32 · 20/02/2026 20:43

BauhausOfEliott · 20/02/2026 20:11

Agreed. I never knew how many people had madly irrational germ phobias until I joined Mumsnet.

Show quote history

It’s not irrational though. If you’re sitting on public transport, or on a seat in a cafe, or a public bench, you don't want to carry that grime into your bed.

You just change into a pair of indoor leggings or whatever.

People on here seem to think showering daily is obsessive, yet sitting on the sofa in outdoor shoes and having your dog lick your face is normal.

It definitely skews the other way.

MsOtisReflects · 20/02/2026 20:38

Ohfudgeoff · 20/02/2026 20:12

I agree with you OP. My DH is one that doesn't get it - he even puts his suitcase and travel bag on the bed and doesn't see a problem with it which really gets my goat! It's literally been on the floor at the bus stop, train station, tube etc, in all manner of countries, and then he brings it home and plonks it on the bed. No, no and no!

Don’t …

I see such behaviour on TV and it frankly makes me want to vomit. I can just about understand if your brand new luggage has gone from the immaculate boot of your car straight to your five star hotel room, you might not think of invisible germs. But I live in a city full of students and tourists and pass strangers rolling suitcases along streets every day. The thought of them reaching their college or hotel room and throwing said muck smeared case (wheels and all 🥴) onto the bed …

Olderandwiserpossibly · 20/02/2026 20:34

CaragianettE · 20/02/2026 19:32

I’d never heard of ‘house clothes’. That must generate a lot of washing.

If you also go to the gym or swimming are you then changing clothes about five times a day? Pajamas into ‘outside’ clothes, outside clothes into gym clothes, then back into outside clothes, then house clothes, then pajamas?

Unless you put the outside clothes immediately into a hot wash every day when you get home, then surely whatever you think is on them is coming into the house anyway? Fleas in the laundry basket is obviously better than fleas in the bed, but aren’t fleas in the laundry basket ultimately likely to wind up in the bed?

I’d never heard of ‘house clothes’. That must generate a lot of washing.

The opposite actually.

StedSarandos · 20/02/2026 20:33

starla, yes, in and out of indoor and outdoor clothes, but it takes about 2 minutes to swap over. Although that's mainly jeans, socks and sweater and into trackpants and indoor sweater Blush. My house clothes are warmer and reduce IBS.

StarlaBell · 20/02/2026 20:30

I have a couple of genuine questions for those who change into house-clothes as soon as you get in...

  1. If you're going out in the morning, then home for a few hours in the middle of the day, and then out again later (but not for e.g. a night out, just to run chores etc, so maybe like doing school run/dog walk/nip to the shops), do you change in and out of your outdoor/house clothes each time?
  2. What happens when you have guests, both for just the day/evening, and overnight? Do you expect them to change out of their outdoor clothes? 🤔

Genuinely interested. It's not something I've ever considered. Personally am far too lazy to do the extra laundry that would involve!😂

Ohfudgeoff · 20/02/2026 20:20

MissPobjoysPonies · 20/02/2026 20:18

I change into leggings when I get home in the same Vein as taking off my bra and freeing the girls. Comfort. I also wear my smart work clothes more than once a week 🤯 I don’t see the same people twice….

how do you feel about PJs and dressing down outside?

Nope, PJs and dressing gown are for inside. Snuggly and cosy. Definitely not to put the bins out, walk the dog or nip to the shop.

twilighteaser · 20/02/2026 20:20

No, and equally clothes worn in bed shouldn't be worn outside. I'm just watching Four in a Bed and so far they have all tested how soft the bed is while wearing shoes. Disgusting.

Ohfudgeoff · 20/02/2026 20:19

Sassiskt · 20/02/2026 20:17

A dog in bed would be FAR more disgusting. It’s not as though they wipe their bottoms when they poo.

Ugh, grim.

cardibach · 20/02/2026 20:19

In v on does seem like a different thing, though it’s not really logical. Plus when I was a boarding houseparent I was permanently sleep deprived so I know I occasionally feel into bed dressed if I wanted a nap and on,y had half an hour plus it was daytime and the house was cold (no heating except morning and evening). Nothing bad happened to me. Well, not from the clothes. I had burnout from the workload eventually.

MissPobjoysPonies · 20/02/2026 20:18

I change into leggings when I get home in the same Vein as taking off my bra and freeing the girls. Comfort. I also wear my smart work clothes more than once a week 🤯 I don’t see the same people twice….

how do you feel about PJs and dressing down outside?

Sassiskt · 20/02/2026 20:17

A dog in bed would be FAR more disgusting. It’s not as though they wipe their bottoms when they poo.

Sassiskt · 20/02/2026 20:16

SouthernNights59 · 20/02/2026 19:50

I lie on my bed, and sometimes in my bed, with outdoor clothes on. Guess what has happened - absolutely nothing! Why are so many people so hung up on non issues like this?

In the words of The Doors - people are strange.

Me too! I might have gone downstairs and eaten breakfast, dropped my child at nursery, gone to the shops, eaten lunch then felt the need for a nap. I’m just getting into bed fully clothed. If I say was a road worker or worked In A&E i suppose I might get changed first.

Owlmoonstar · 20/02/2026 20:15

CaptainMyCaptain · 20/02/2026 20:00

I've never heard of house clothes. I lie on my bed whenever I like whatever I'm wearing as does my husband. The dog also sleeps on the bed and gets in the sofa. I'm never ill. You people are nuts.

Show quote history

It's not a fear of getting ill. It's just a sense of disgust.

Or at least that's how it is for me.

Ohfudgeoff · 20/02/2026 20:12

I agree with you OP. My DH is one that doesn't get it - he even puts his suitcase and travel bag on the bed and doesn't see a problem with it which really gets my goat! It's literally been on the floor at the bus stop, train station, tube etc, in all manner of countries, and then he brings it home and plonks it on the bed. No, no and no!

Original poster
Clover96 · 20/02/2026 20:11

@sharkstale It stresses me out 😅 I do try bite my tongue at times but I'm on edge just now with being pregnant and in a lot of pain after the dentist, I couldn't not mention it today.

OP posts:
BauhausOfEliott · 20/02/2026 20:11

onlyoneoftheregimentinstep · 20/02/2026 19:33

This is Mumsnet. In real
life outdoor clothes on the bed aren’t worth a passing thought. On Mumsnet they’re a hanging offence.

Agreed. I never knew how many people had madly irrational germ phobias until I joined Mumsnet.

sharkstale · 20/02/2026 20:10

Makes me feel sick just thinking about it 🤮 can't believe how many people don't see a problem with it

TamarindCottage · 20/02/2026 20:09

If I fancy an afternoon nap, I change into my jim jams. Getting in bed fully clothed would be uncomfortable

IAmKerplunk · 20/02/2026 20:05

It doesn’t bother me at all - but I don’t share my bed with anyone. My dd gets changed as soon as she walks through the front door - she hates wearing outside clothes indoors.

eta I can well imagine my dd being like you if and when she lives with somebody. She is very particular!

NotMeAtAll · 20/02/2026 20:01

CaptainMyCaptain · 20/02/2026 20:00

I've never heard of house clothes. I lie on my bed whenever I like whatever I'm wearing as does my husband. The dog also sleeps on the bed and gets in the sofa. I'm never ill. You people are nuts.

Show quote history

Yep.

CaptainMyCaptain · 20/02/2026 20:00

TreesinthePark · 20/02/2026 19:41

I'm shocked you've never heard of house clothes!

My houseclothes sometimes I specifically buy as loungwear for home, sometimes its outside clothes that have got too old/worn to wear out. Sometimes it's an online order that doesn't quite suit me but is cheap enough not to bother returning!

Show quote history

I've never heard of house clothes. I lie on my bed whenever I like whatever I'm wearing as does my husband. The dog also sleeps on the bed and gets in the sofa. I'm never ill. You people are nuts.

Original poster
Clover96 · 20/02/2026 19:57

@Flowersandfauna Haha, I know how bonkers I sound to him so was just curious what other people thought. Its not something that's become a full blown argument by any means, I know I'm quite OCD with other things but I thought the bed thing was quite normal, he looked at me as if I had two heads and doesn't believe anyone else would find it strange to just jump in bed whenever you want, without giving a second thought to how clean you are 😂

OP posts:
Flowersandfauna · 20/02/2026 19:53

Nowt so queer as folk 🤣

borntooobesilly · 20/02/2026 19:52

On bed ok
In bed okish

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