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AIBU?

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AIBU to have ditched my family on holiday walk

256 replies

Mounjaroday · 19/02/2026 16:55

On holiday and we’d just started our annual coastal walk. We have to navigate over a very squelchy muddy bit, one at a time. DH goes first, then strides off ahead at pace. As usual. Then the kids leap over, and run off to keep up with him. I’m suddenly left trailing behind at the back yet again, and it’s absolutely maddening.

“Wait up” was met with a rather cross “well keep up then” nonsense from DH. He doesn’t wait for me and they keep going - DH striding away, and the kids trotting along - and they don’t even bother looking where I am. They are easily 20m in front at this point.

So this time, I stopped, turned around and ditched the whole lot of them. Went for a mooch around the lovely gift and antique shops in the local town. Then grabbed a coffee and read some of my book. 2 hours all by myself. It was absolutely fabulous.

Was I unreasonable? They’re all salty about how I’d “left them”.

OP posts:
Happyjoe · 19/02/2026 19:48

Sounds miles better! Nice. 😁

Nearly50omg · 19/02/2026 19:47

Emmz1510 · 19/02/2026 18:25

My OH is really bad for this. He forgets he is much taller than me and DD and always goes ahead, even on a normal walk like round a shopping centre. I also consider myself a quick walker but he’s a nightmare.
I probably wouldn’t have did what you did because I wouldn’t want him thinking I wasn’t ’up to’ the walk and got tired out! But good for you for not being a shitebag like me…..

Don’t make up shit about him “forgetting” because he’s taller! He doesn’t give a shit about you or the children! It’s as simple as that! Complete lack of disrespect and consideration

TheMorgenmuffel · 19/02/2026 19:47

Fuck 'em. If they cant be arsed to wait up then why should you run after them?

An activity should be done at the pace of the slowest / least able person in the group imo. People can always go slower but it simply isnt always possible for someone to go faster.

Prancingpickle · 19/02/2026 19:46

PrizedPickledPopcorn · 19/02/2026 17:12

Absolutely not! This is classic behaviour, the alpha man at the front making no effort to support the rest of the group. Inevitably mum pauses to make sure the DC successfully negotiate the hazards, and is then left to catch up.

Except DC were all waking at Dad's pace! So there was no making sure the kids had navigated obstacles!

WhenRealityHits · 19/02/2026 19:45

You're my hero of the day!

Pepperedpickles · 19/02/2026 19:44

Your dh sounds so incredibly rude. I couldn’t stay married to someone who would talk to me with such contempt.

I am disabled and walk a lot slower than the rest of my family. I know it’s frustrating for them but they always wait for me, walk with me. It’s just polite.

Nearly50omg · 19/02/2026 19:32

They left you!!!

momtoboys · 19/02/2026 19:28

Go, you! I would have done the same thing.

paulhollywoodshairgel · 19/02/2026 19:20

Sounds a much nicer use of time!! Well done and I’m glad for you ❤️❤️

grumpygrape · 19/02/2026 19:20

AlcoholicAntibiotic · 19/02/2026 18:15

Then don’t go on group walks.

SoSadSoSadSoSad can answer for themselves but why did you think they were complaining about group walks ?

Stompythedinosaur · 19/02/2026 19:16

YANBU at all!

I have this issue, and I hate hate hate being forced to slog along at the back.

I'm clear if advance now, that I will not go for a walk with anyone if they won't walk with me.

He was a dick, and you didn't stand for it. Well done you!

BashfulClam · 19/02/2026 18:57

I often have to remind DH to slow down slightly as he strides ahead. He’s not too bad though. Your DH should have helped you with create muddy bit.

Keepingthingsinteresting · 19/02/2026 18:54

In fact they left you, so you were well within your rights. I’m short and hate when people do this and in a partner it just shows disregard and contempt. Also terrible hillcraft as it’s a basic tenet that the group goes t the speed of the slowest walker.

Glad you had a nice day @Mounjaroday .

Iloveacurry · 19/02/2026 18:42

You didn’t leave them, they left you behind! Sounds like you might as well gone on the walk by yourself!

FreyaW · 19/02/2026 18:35

Aluna · 19/02/2026 17:35

I guess I don’t quite understand why your kids can keep up with DH but not you. Is your username a clue are you a bit overweight?

I can see it from both sides. It’s annoying having to walk slowly but it’s annoying not being able to keep up with someone marching ahead.

Talking of user names..are you a bit of a moonbeam?
Wtf
Sort yourdelf out.
Ultra rude.

ErrolTheDragon · 19/02/2026 18:32

We don’t always walk at the same speed as each other - typically DH is a bit faster uphill, I’m much faster than him downhill. But we always stop and wait for the other(s) regularly, don’t get out of sight.

InWithPeaceOutWithStress · 19/02/2026 18:31

It seems a bit mean to not wait for you after the muddy bit, I would expect to wait for each other / help each other if needed.

Emmz1510 · 19/02/2026 18:25

My OH is really bad for this. He forgets he is much taller than me and DD and always goes ahead, even on a normal walk like round a shopping centre. I also consider myself a quick walker but he’s a nightmare.
I probably wouldn’t have did what you did because I wouldn’t want him thinking I wasn’t ’up to’ the walk and got tired out! But good for you for not being a shitebag like me…..

FreyaW · 19/02/2026 18:25

Mounjaroday · 19/02/2026 16:55

On holiday and we’d just started our annual coastal walk. We have to navigate over a very squelchy muddy bit, one at a time. DH goes first, then strides off ahead at pace. As usual. Then the kids leap over, and run off to keep up with him. I’m suddenly left trailing behind at the back yet again, and it’s absolutely maddening.

“Wait up” was met with a rather cross “well keep up then” nonsense from DH. He doesn’t wait for me and they keep going - DH striding away, and the kids trotting along - and they don’t even bother looking where I am. They are easily 20m in front at this point.

So this time, I stopped, turned around and ditched the whole lot of them. Went for a mooch around the lovely gift and antique shops in the local town. Then grabbed a coffee and read some of my book. 2 hours all by myself. It was absolutely fabulous.

Was I unreasonable? They’re all salty about how I’d “left them”.

They left you...
Sounds like you had a lovely time.

AlcoholicAntibiotic · 19/02/2026 18:15

SoSadSoSadSoSad · 19/02/2026 17:50

I am a fast walker. I don’t like walking with dawdlers or slow walkers. I think you did the right thing.

Then don’t go on group walks.

Mischance · 19/02/2026 18:15

All power to your elbow!!

CelestialCandyfloss · 19/02/2026 18:12

You say your DH strode off 'as usual' so it sounds like this is not the first time this has happened. I get you. You had a nice few hours and DH could have taken over the parenting

Benjithedog · 19/02/2026 18:11

I say good for you

outerspacepotato · 19/02/2026 18:07

You asked them to wait, they couldn't be bothered. They were rude, not you.

Good for you for going off and doing something you enjoy. It sounds like they hit a faster pace than you can keep up with and are unwilling to go slower, so you do your own thing.

MissCooCooMcgoo · 19/02/2026 18:01

Tallestone · 19/02/2026 17:49

I've thought about doing this just wandering off. Dp just strides ahead.with Dd and leaves me behind. I wonder how long it would take him to notice I was gone. I might do it next time he does it.

My ex husband used to do this to me in all scenarios when out walking anywhere.

He did not care about me. At. All.

I just went home once on a night out and he didn't notice.

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