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AIBU?

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Original poster

DH and family left me alone in a restaurant

365 replies

TemporaryWombat · 16/02/2026 11:59

This didn’t happen recently but it still bugs me! Went out for a meal for MIL birthday, I was 8 months pregnant and at the end of the meal FIL paid the bill - I stood up and told DH I was going to the toilet, went (I wasn’t long) came back and everyone had buggered off! I was stood there embarrassed asking the waiters where everyone was. I went to the car park and wandered around in the dark trying to find DH car.

AIBU or is it really inconsiderate to just leave? DH sees no fault and said the meal was over and it was obvious we were all leaving. It felt very crappy and definitely not something I would do or my family.

OP posts:
busyd4y · 16/02/2026 12:07

Why did you have to wander about in the dark, did they move the car to prank you?

BruisedNeckMeat · 16/02/2026 12:06

Total non-event.

The meal was finished, bill paid yet you were asking wait staff where everyone was? You were deliberately being dramatic.

DestinedToBeOutlived · 16/02/2026 12:06

Totally normal.

He met you back at the car, which was presumably in the same place you parked in to get there.

ArcticSkua · 16/02/2026 12:06

I think it was a little inconsiderate, but YABU to still be dwelling on it if it didn't happen recently.

Moonnstarz · 16/02/2026 12:06

Sounds normal if they were waiting in the car. The bill has been paid, you want the staff to be able to feel able to clean the table without people sitting there in the way.
The only way this would be weird is if they drove off without you and didn't realise you were missing.

Isittimeformynapyet · 16/02/2026 12:06

I'm astonished that you've carried this around for any length of time, or at all really. I hope you come round to seeing how silly you're being.

DaisyChain505 · 16/02/2026 12:05

Surely you knew where your partners car was as you came to the restaurant in the car?

If the meal was over and you were all leaving it’s not completely strange that they all went outside as else they’d just be standing around for you potentially taking up room in a crowded restaurant.

That being said your partner could have waited just outside the door for you but it really isn’t something I’d still be thinking about now.

Cosyblankets · 16/02/2026 12:05

OMG did they drive off and leave you?
Surely they were just in the car.
What is the issue?
Why did you need to ask the staff? What else is there to do in a restaurant once you've paid the bill?

Brewtiful · 16/02/2026 12:04

This would be completely normal surely? Did you honestly expect them all to stay in the restaurant when you went to the toilet after paying the bill?

rubyslippers · 16/02/2026 12:04

We do this - thought it was fairly usual
bill all paid, someone pops to the loo and the family go and sit in the car (warm it up if it is winter)

SweeetFannyAdams · 16/02/2026 12:03

Did no-one have a mobile phone?

aBuffetofunreasonableness · 16/02/2026 12:03

So he was waiting in the car for you? What's wrong with that?

angelos02 · 16/02/2026 12:02

It wouldn't bother me at all - wouldn't even cross my mind to be offended or put out.

WhatAreYouDoingSundayBaby · 16/02/2026 12:01

It's not the most polite of them not to wait for you, at least outside the front door of the restaurant, but also not something I would dwell on, I doubt it was done out of any spite.

Rockstick · 16/02/2026 12:00

I think it woukd be quite normal to meet people outside if you'd decided to go to the loo as everyone was leaving, and presumably DH's car was where you'd left it. How big can a restaurant carpark be?