DH and family left me alone in a restaurant

Very rude of them not to wait / say goodbye. However you need to let go of it / pick your battles. Presumably it won't happen again.

I assumed you were all in the same car but it is rude if they left without saying goodbye and drive away but not worth dwelling on.

Exactly! Did you think they were hiding under the table? You had absolutely NO CLUE where they might be? Why were you wandering around the car park looking for the car? Wasn’t it where you had left it?

My husband has the social awareness of a hippopotamus and even he would not leave a restaurant without me. His mum is disabled and would need help to the car, so he might say to me that he would make a head start with getting there. And then come back for me if I had not come out before they got to the car.

well its crazy to me honestly. this would not even register in my mind, I wouldn't even notice it at all. I never ever thought of myself at all. my husabnd would do things that were really stressful for me. he'd leave me waiting at night to be picked up fro 30 mins and I didnt say anything. but the stress and his behaviour when I was submitting my phd contributed to me having a psychotic breakdwon and I lost everythign id worked for and I cant work. I despise myself now. I was so stupid and im so mentally ill. I produced world class research and published books. and I also have disabilities now. if I asked him t odd soemthing he would basically just ignore it. and my mind has gone and im in conscious torment every minute of every day

Totally agree ...rude

I'd at least have expected my dh to wait for me inside the restaurant by the door just to be thoughtful.

No, my DH would have waited for me.

I think it is really rude. I wouldn't just leave someone I had spent the evening with and not say goodbye. I can see whe are your dh got his manners from.

It is a bit rude and I may have been mildly irked at the time. But it isn't a sufficient social faux pas that I would brood on it.

Yes this. It's one thing to leave the restaurant to free up the table and wait for op outside. It's another for DH to leave his heavily pregnant wife behind and for the in-laws to head off without a goodbye.

My DH would have waited by the door or brought the car to pick me up. He would have just wondered off.

I'm thinking that that wasn't the last time DH has prioritised his own comfort or his parents over op or she wouldn't still be mulling over this.

If I was out with someone heavily pregnant and they had gone to the toilet I would definitely have waited just in case something happened. When I was pregnant I had the odd time after eating that I would feel hot and faint you might have felt the same. The inlaws I would say were slightly rude but your husband was unkind.

Well, yes, but it's just daft to still be affected by it for any length of time.

I thought it was rude from your first post

following your clarifying second post I think it’s appallingly rude

This. I’d have forgotten about it by the time I was home. 🏡

Well, you were clearly some time in the loo 🤷🏻‍♀️
Of course it’s normal to wait outside, you’re a grown woman.

It’s really not a big deal, is it? Is the pregnancy bit relevant? Did you have mobility issues and needed help to walk? I’m intrigued as to why you’re still thinking about it.

We wouldn't dream of doing this. We would have left together or arranged to meet. It sounds really inconsiderate and rude to me. Plus if anyone in the family is pregnant, they are the centre of every activity and would have been the absolute priority.

I think it’s rude as well. Your in laws didn’t wait to say goodbye to you and your husband didn’t tell you he’d wait for you in the car. That’s just rude.

It's weird when you finally realise isn't it? You start treating yourself like a princess from now on x

I’m maybe not getting the issue, so they left, went to car. How could you not find the car, did you come in a different vehicle so you didn’t know where it was parked? How big was the car park? Did neither of you have phones.

They were all thoughtless, rude and lacked manners.

It’s not great but it’s also not something that should still be upsetting you months (?) down the line. Ask DH to wait next time, that’s all that’s needed.

Terrible manners and completely inconsiderate.

Like fathers who walk ahead while wife wrangling behind with the young children. Or people who walk at pace while an older or unwell person is struggling to keep up. By the responses on here you'd expect that those scenarios are fine - but it's the same attitude. If you come together, you stick together and do things at the pace of the most vulnerable/weakest.

I don't think it's rude the others left (particularly if they had somewhere to be) but ideally they'd have said goodbye first. Your DH should have waited for you unless you had explicitly agreed to meet at the car.

No wonder so many rude people around these days (particularly men) if goinf by the responses on here, their mothers and partners excuse this inconsiderate behaviour .

Agree with this. I've always been sensitive to this sort of thing though because when I was young, my friends would often walk off without me and I always felt that if I didn't run to catch up they'd just continue because I was so unimportant to them.